How do you stop bulling in the work place?

Question

i work in a very small place, there are 2 people who are there who keep makeing my life hell, they spread lies and do of "she said this and that" i keep getting pulled into the office and reprmarned like a child for saying these things, these 2 people have been there for 8 years and ihave been there 2 years and because of these people i have been in trouble with the boss 3 times, and last week was the worst one, it is like being back at school,When i asked the boss if they had any problem with my job they said no your work is brillent it is just the"gossip" i have apparntly said. In which i have not said anything of the sought, Also thes 2 people have refused to work with me cus i apparntly am too hard to work with. Belive me when i say i normaly dont talk at work at all i just go in do my job and come home.
i love my job and the hours and pay, leaveing is not what i want to do, but i realy can not cope with this any more, im currently off work for 2 weeks due ot stress

Answer 1

This happens alot especially in smaller businesses where you have family members or people who have worked for the company for a long time. Plant a small tape recorder somewhere near the place where people have a tendency to gather and talk. Break room, smokers area, lunch room.You might be able to head off some of the roomers before they get to your Boss. Try to make them look foolish. You cannot play this for your Boss but it could come in handy if things got to a point of he said she said. These 2 people do not like you because the boss obviously likes your work and they feel threatened. Whether the threat is real or not. In private explain to your Boss the situation at hand and without pointing the finger at the 2 girls who have it in for you. Just tell him that you are not like that and he will have to form his own opinion about you. You like working here but you will seek another position elsewhere if he feels that theses accusations are true. Ask him if he has had this happen with other employees? Sometimes they don't see a pattern until you bring it up? Had the same problem with the New Head Chef where I work. She was out to get me fired because I was too meticulous in my work. She would tell people what she made and then blame me in front of the boss for telling people what she made(I am the Payrolll clerk/Bookkeeper) I stuck to my guns and stayed on top of her all the time. I finally saw a problem with things missing and people fighting with each other all the time. I went to my Boss and left him a note saying think about when your problems here all started? I left it at that. He started watching her more closely and found out she was stealing stuff from the freezer on a daily basis. He fired her and apologized to me and we have a very good trust relationship going now. It was not easy and I had to bite my tongue many many times. Be careful if you use the tape you may hear things you did not really want to hear. Stick to your guns and keep your cool. If they think they are starting to wear you down they will keep on doing it. If they think it isn't working they will give up.

Answer 2

You need to do your best to ignore them and not be any part of their childish ways, its really a bad work enviorment and Im sorry you are having this problem. You need to step away from the drama and let those people know you are there to work and not going to participate.

Is there a Human Resources person you can go to?
Are you in a position where you can wear headphones and "tune" the bullies out?

DO NOT PARTICIPATE what-so-ever. These people have some sort of insecurity problem and are wasting time & energy, dont get sucked in. You have to ignore the gossip and tell them you dont care to know... Have evidence to the harrassment. You need to log all of these events, time, date and who was present when things happen and exactly what they are saying and also how you handled it...

You will be suprised how much more focused you are and how much more work you get done when you are not seemingly "involved" with their stuff. The boss may even notice too and realize you are not in that click of time wasters.

You should call your state unemployment office and ask them for resources for coping with stress on the job. They will direct you to who to file a complaint with so its on record esp. if your job is in jeopardy due to these people's behaviour.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

Confront these persons, letting them know in no uncertain terms will u be tolerating their behaviour towards u and if it doesn't stop u will have no choice but to take it to the next level. Also when ur boss comes to u with this gossip ask him or her for proof of what u did and if they can't give u proof just look them in the eye and ask them then y r u reprimanding me if then go on to explain what has been happening.
If this does not work then i suggest u go to whoever is above ur boss, follow the chain of command first and if all that fails get urself a laywer but make this a last resort since when u take this step, things may get more difficult at work. So chin up take a deep breath and do what u need to do.
Good luck

Answer 4

It may be a battle you can't win. Since it's a small company I'm going to guess they DON'T have an HR department. As for your self evaluation here on the net, I'm dubious about what you say, especially after reading your command of the inglesh language. Nevertheless, if you have NO OTHER alternative you (if you are in America) can contact the labor board and ask them what to do. You have the right not to have to work in a hostile environment by law. If no one within the company is protecting your rights then it may be time to get an outside agency involved.

But you can expect problems to only get worse. If you do something like that, they will look for reasons to get rid of you. You also need to face the fact that your performance may not be as good as you think. Inevitably you will loose the job. Best be prepared for that outcome. OR change jobs.

Stress is a killer, slow but effective. Find another environment where you can work without having to deal with bullies.

I hope you can resolve your issues, best luck.

Answer 5

Although I agree with the Oregon Kid, I still like to add that there are some other things that you can do along the way. Ask for a meeting where all your accusers are present and the boss. Explain that you want to have the opportunity to clear the air about things. State that you were wrongfully accused of gossip but that you are ready to forget it and if you are again accused in the future that you would like to be called in and be able to stand with your accuser(s) with the boss present. But a word of caution, if your boss only needs hearsay, then try to bury them with a lawyer. You probably need documentation, but your employer will resist any cooperation. Take your lawyers advice and contact the Bureau of Labor Relations in your state for further advice before taking any other suggestions. Be strong and patient.

P.S. Susan Davies has some great advice too.

Answer 6

OMG. This sounds sooo like my last job. I had this borderline personality pyschospaz who was a total gossiping backstabber. If she didn't like you, your life was a living hell. And she was so friggin needy that you ended up loathing coming in to work.

I went to my bosses and they did nothing. Small office too, by the way. They told me that Marion was going nowhere and to pretty much deal with it.

After a while, it got so crazy that I was bursting out crying to my bosses and acting crazy myself. They eventually canned me because they didn't want to deal with the drama anymore.

She had been there for 14 years. I was there for 3. Same crap you're in.

Honestly, i'd start looking for another gig. I don't think they'll ever take your side, especially in a small office where standards are kind of a gray area.

I work for a big law firm (over 400 employees) and I must tell you, being fired was the best thing that ever happened to me. While its stricter and more uniform, I don't have to worry about being mistreated and no one doing anything about it.

Good luck to you.

Answer 7

You can't change their behaviour and turn them into adults. Its making you ill. Start jobhunting. In the meantime, keep an event diary. Get support and advice from a trade union or solicitor.
You'll need proof of your innocence to fight this; and proving you didn't do something can be impossible, especially when there are 2 trusted witnesses.
If these people have refused to work with you, how do they know what you said? Doesn't your boss think its odd?
You might try putting in a complaint to your boss, in writing, about their behaviour but get some help with it. Make sure you stick to the facts. Say its affecting your work but don't get overemotional.

Answer 8

Talk to someone else besides your boss, HR Dept maybe or another manager and let them know how you feel. Sounds like these two individuals are creating a hostile work environment and that is a form of harassment. You can ask for help in resolving this matter and tell the mgr or your boss that if this doesn't get resolved you have no choice but report them. good luck!

Answer 9

sorry to here about your problem,but you are not alone,it is very common for bullying at work.
there should be codes of practice and a grievence procedure in place at your work.this is not a typicall example though because it seems to be based purely on hearsay without any tangible evidence at all.your word against theres.
solution 1-although not ethical is to have a small recording device to tape any conversation you have with either of these two,then if you are accused of saying anything you can play the conversation back to the boss,this would then put thier honesty into serious doubt,this is somrthing you could only do the once.2-try to have an impartiall witness about when talking to them
3-write down any conversation you have with them,and tell them what you are doing and why
4try and be strong,do not let them win
mike

Answer 10

Have a discussion with your boss about the situation. Refrain from making it a personal issue... stick with the matter at hand and talk about the impact on work.

Let him / her be the one to open the topic of gossip and follow their lead of questions, but only after they start it.

That will demonstrate that you're interests are what's best for the business and office environment and not just your personal beliefs.

Then allow some time for them to make whatever changes.

If ample time has elapsed and nothing has improved, then and only then, go talk with their boss.