Why are daughters more attached to their fathers & sons to their mothers?

Question

It is my observation that fathers are more affectionate to their daughters & mothers like to pamper their boys. Is this a universal phenomenon & why?

Answer 1

I don't think that's the rule, but check out Dr. Freud's psychology. He would say that's some kind of trauma that children develop (Edipo & Elektra)

Answer 2

I've noticed it my family. My wife has a much easier time talking to our two boys, while I find it MUCH easier to talk to my daughter.

The relationships are blatantly different. I suspect it carries over generally to many families.

What I notice with my daughter is "pre-flirting" behavior. I'm not sure what else to call it -- it's flirting without the sexual component. She sort of views herself in competition to my wife for my attention emotionally, she loves to dote on me and play around in conversation, and so forth.

I feel like she is unconsciously "practicing" for how to relate to a guy when she gets older. Also, she is looking for affirmation that she is desirable and someone I want to be with. She also loves it when I do things that show how "strong" I am -- picking her up, swinging her around, and so on. The boys like it as well, but more in the "play sense" -- where she seems to be emotionally affirmed and feel more secure as a person by knowing I am strong enough to take care of her, and that she's safe here.

My wife really nurtures the boys, and they like to be affirmed and feel secure knowing that they have a safe place to go to, where their needs will be met, after the stresses of the day. It's like they use her for a secure haven from which they can venture out, then come back later to refuel.

I hate to compare it to "romance" because that has negative connotations, but there's nothing sexual about it -- it's like all of the emotional aspects without the sexuality. I love her, I think she's beautiful, I love to be with her, I love to take care of her and enjoy it when she feels safe and valued. I protect her and am strong for her.

While I love my boys as well and do those things for them, my relationship tends to be a little more impersonal and doesn't feel quite the same way.

Sorry I can't quite articulate the feelings, it's hard to put into words.

Answer 3

Oedipus/ Electra Complex by Freud.. says you develop a different kind of relationship with a parent of the opposite sex.. And have a sort of subconscious envy/competition going on with the parent of the same sex..

Answer 4

in my point of view the phenomena of love affection is of different type like mother affection towards the their child is different than the love of a wife toward the husband sooo love is a mystery it is good to be a mystery and Ur question is type of mysterious love which cant judge on why

Answer 5

well one of my sons prefers his father over me, but the rest of them 1 more boy, and 2 girls prefer me!!!I understand what u mean though that is the norm. I'm not sure why though.

Answer 6

maybe because the girl will get information of how to get boys from her dad and the son will also get information of how to impress a girl form the mom . or the girl might get to know what boys like . and also the boy will know what girls like .

Answer 7

It is, mostly because the parent of the oppiste sex gives u the most straight foward advice about, well everything

Answer 8

usually, when kids go to their dads, that means that the mom is more out of date then him so she totally prefers him then her. dont take that personally moms!

Answer 9

No, that´s absolutely not true - I mean you shouldn´t generalize that!

Answer 10

actually it all depends to the child...