how does the divorce effect the children in the later yrs.?

Answer 1

That all depends on your actions after the divorce and whether or not you're mature enough to continue to remain friends with your ex and strive to keep continuity in the lives of your children.
I've been divorced from my sons' mother since 1989, they have both lived with me since then and to this day their mother visits here regularly and they see her constantly. She and I have remained friends despite our differences and as time as passed the wound of a failed marriage have healed and our children have grown with the feeling of a mutual love from both parents.

Answer 2

Having gone through a divorce when my children were 6 and 11 I have some experience here. My 11 year old was old enough to have some understanding of why his Dad was leaving the house (my wife at the time asked me for a divorce and I didn't see it coming). I have a great relationship with him (he's now 23) and he has turned out to be a good young man. My 6 year old didn't understand, she was a daddy girl and it affected her to this day. She is now 19 and going to college but our relationship fell apart and though we both try, we just can't seem to connect. It will be different with each child depending upon many things that were going on for them but this is what happened for me.
All you can do is try to be there for them and don't say mean things about your former spouse. My ex had nothing by bad things to say about me and I'm sure this didn't help my relationship with my Daughter.

Answer 3

Much depends upon how the whole thing is handled and it also has a lot to do with the individual child. I am the oldest of 7 and our parents divorced when I was a teen and youngest sister was a few months old. You can look at us to see the wide range of effects. I look to be OK and I think that I am My sister is not and has never been able to have a trusting relationship with a man. One brother has been in and out of jail and another contracted aids from drug abuse and died 4 years ago. One brother is on his second wife and he cheats on her just like dad cheated on mom and another brother is undercover gay. My youngest sister seems to be all right but she is constantly worrying that her husband is going to leave even though anyone can see that it would take dynamite to blast him away from her. I think it is all because of the divorce and how it effected us. I was old enough to have a better undrestanding of what was going on but the others were so young. I hope this answeres your question

Answer 4

I have four children and have been divorced for some time now. My children's dad and I have been good friends over the years and have really come together in raising our children. We have always talked and not fought over silly stuff. We kept our children's needs first. The best thing you can do is keep an "open door" policy with them should they need to come to you and talk about anything! Letting them know that you both love them and want what is best for them even though you two aren't together gives them more security. It isn't easy for some. Maybe you would benefit from a support group for divorced parents?

Answer 5

My parents have been divorced for about 33yrs now. I was only 3 yrs old back then. All I can say is that it does affect the child/children. I grew up without my father, but gotten the chance to get to know him when I was 14 yrs old. I missed him and told myself that maybe it is my fault that they divorce, or maybe if I wasnt born then they would still be together. Those kind of things. I lost the sense of 'trust" in men. Now, I am going through the same thing. I've been married for 16 yrs and I filed for divorce. My kids are well adjusted now, but for the first few months of my separation with their father it was very hard on them. I know that they went through the "blame" part. My youngest child which is my daughter (7 yrs old) kept telling me, "it is my fault mom or is it my fault mommy that dad left"? It hurts them to see that their parents are getting a divorce. They will feel like it is their fault, they will lose their sense of family security and it may even affect their future relationships. Kids tend to "model" their parent's relationship. They will think that if my parents got a divorce, then maybe I will, too.
Just make sure that you are there for your kids. Always tell them that even though your mommy and daddy are not together anymore that we both love you and that we will always be there for you. Dont use your kids in order to get your husband/wife back. You dont have to be together with your spouse just for your child/children's sake. Most of all love your child/children. Good luck

Answer 6

the way it works QueenBea (atypical call for a guy) is she has to pay for a DNA try $3 hundred. if the try proves your the dad then she has you got a lawyer and he's taking that and records a petition for back help for those years. The decide determines while you're in certainty the dad and determines the quantity after which you've a fee time table to pay on each month. this might bypass interior the path of the youngster help branch for the state so which you get credit each month. yet she is staring at passing some greenbacks to get this going.

Answer 7

It took a long time, and there has been some therapy for me. My sister is still pretty messed up though. There were many other circumstances besides my parents divorcing. Although I realize now that my parents did the best they could, and it's ok.

Answer 8

divorce shatters a childs sense of security our views of the world tend to be more pessimistick and the feeling of love is harder to have for others later in life
we tend to see our family as less respectful and really wonder who was the f.ckup who caused it to all fall apart
and lastly we wonder why did you get married at all ...if as a child i am suposed to be a symbol of your love what does it mean when u break up? maybe i was a mistake to

Answer 9

That all depends on the kids and where they are at with things in their life. It can mess them up but so can a messed up marriage where they see mom and dad never love each other or get along either!

Answer 10

We stayed kinda messed up as in who can we really count on