His behavior has been crazier than usual. He is so down & wants to drink all the time. His work enviro is really bad- long hours and he has lots issues. like debt, etc. When he started the meds, he started going out every Thursday w/ co-workers and staying out until all hours. I saw that a female co-worker called his cell at 3 am 2 weekends ago, and last Sat I caught him calling her when we were out at a bar. Of course he was drunk.
He admitted to having 'feelings" for her, but says they aren’t that strong. He says that it’s not weird to call people when you are drunk. He even gets drunk and calls his guy friends. I said are these 'feelings' strong enough to risk loosing me? He said know and gave me the whole you are my soul mate speal. He has been engaging in really risky behavior-drinking and driving, etc. He says that he just doesn't care anymore what happens to him or who he hurts-even his mom, who he use to love. Has the zoloft made him crazy or is it me that he doesn’t want to be with? Seems like this girl is part of his risky behavior and his not caring and need to drink. Ideas?
2006-06-07 08:12:25 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
3 things:
1)Alcohol and Zoloft are a bad combo. In fact it sounds like he is headed for becoming an alcoholic. Is he receiving any therapy other than Zoloft. Often times people want to just take a pill and feel better, but the drug just helps them never face up to their real issues. He needs counseling in addition to a drug regiment.
2)You can't save him. He needs to save himself. By letting him do what he is doing, and blame Zoloft/drinking. You are encouraging him to get worse.
3)People who drink don't become different people. They just tend to act out things they'd normally try to conceal, or suppress. To me it sounds like he is actively thinking about cheating on you with this other woman. Otherwise he would not be calling her.
Personally I say you need to get out and save yourself before he drags you down. It might be worth making one last attempt to get him to realize he is on a downward spiral. By telling him you are leaving him if things don't change. At minimum he needs to stop drinking so much, see his doctor again, and stop calling the other woman.
2006-06-07 09:30:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand the depression aspect of it all and the "don't care" attituded - there myself somewhat and I don't have medication. It's hard to tell what he's up to but having an I don't care attitude can make you allow yourself to do things. I know that may not sound like it makes sense and unless you've felt THIS low before you won't know. Sad and VERY depressed are two different things. It is NOT strange to make phone calls when you are drinking and people to tend to do that (cuz they want to talk) -- it usually isn't a good idea though since you may not remember what you said or you say something wrong (and you wouldn't say if you were sober). I'd talk to the doctor - it seems like if he's taken the meds for a month they should be working.
2006-06-07 08:20:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Zoloft and alcohol together are a sure recipe for disaster. If he's taking one, he should not be taking the other, and I think you know which one he should quit.
Sounds like he is becoming an alcoholic. He needs help. A LOT of help.
If this relationship is important for you, stick around and help him get out of this depression and alcohol abusive behavior. Right now he's going down, fast. He will hurt himself and his surroundings (including you) blaming it all on alcohol.
If you're not committed to this relationship, get the hell out of it, as soon as you can. Before he kills himself while drinking and driving, or cheats on you while being drunk.
In any case, this is not a healthy person you want to be around. Either help him get cured, or run away.
2006-06-07 08:42:24 · answer #3 · answered by brand_new_monkey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have some really big decisions to make. Speaking from personal experiences, your boyfriend may need to try other meds. Many times, as with my mothers case, you have to try sevaral meds to find the one that works for you. Chances are that your boyfriend does need to change his meds, but that doesnt exscuse the phone calls to female workers, even if he is drunk. Try to get away from this guy as soon as possible, because in the long run, its only going to cause you heartache. He has already exibited the signs of cheating, the longer you stick around, the more painful it will be for you. You deserve better, and you know it.
2006-06-07 08:25:15 · answer #4 · answered by mr.margarita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well,......i think it's a pretty good clue,....i mean you noticed the connection between the zoloft and the timing in his behavioral thing......so yep,....i think it's a pretty good bet that it has to do with the zoloft......one of the reactions a person can have when taking zoloft is a feeling of "disconnection" and though alot of folks would disagree with that,.....i can assure you that it does happen......drinking and zoloft dont go together well...If he doesnt care,...then he'll continue acting this way,....If he does care, then things will change,......Take the clue here,......words are cheap, you can buy the entire english language in a book for $29.95....it's called the dictionary!.......How much do you have invested in your relationship?....more than $29.95 I hope!
2006-06-07 08:30:34 · answer #5 · answered by theoregonartist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
#1 it's losing not "loosing"
#2 it's schpeal not "speal", if you use yiddish, use it right.
He might be so depressed because his girlfriend doesn't have the skill or desire to properly use the English language.
Just a thought.
2006-06-07 08:33:14 · answer #6 · answered by Landau C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
run run run before your feelings are to strong and you feel you cant leave trust me been there you will wind up feeling stuck with nowhere to go
2006-06-07 08:18:28 · answer #7 · answered by Sue D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋