Is my neighbor being too nosey?

Question

My neighbors TV room is right next to my driveway. She keeps an eye on what is going on outside all the time. She knows when my car leaves the garage and when I am outside or not.

She left a message at my house this morning asking if I was sick, because she saw my husband pulling weeds in the garden the other day. what?!

If she is keeping track of who is doing what at our house (outside), is this an invasion of our privacy?

Just because I am not pulling weeds, and my husband is, there MUST be something wrong with me? oh brother.

I understand my neighbor is in her 70s, and is home a lot watching TV, but I feel that she is being nosey just a little too much.

Any thoughts?

I forgot to add - my neighbor lives with her daughter and two granddaughters. She has 13 children, but 12 of them do not live at home. She's not living by herself.

Our garden is BEHIND our garage. Our garden cannot be seen from her TV room window.

"have sex in the driveway" - I like that one!

She is a sweet lady. I'm not saying that she is a witch or anything. It's just kind of creepy that somebody is constantly watching over here. We keep our blinds closed on that side of the house.

My neighbor across the street from us stands in his front yard and stares at our house a lot. He's in his 40s, married and has two kids! We've lived here over 11 years now. It's not like we are the "new neighbors" on the block or anything.

Answer 1

Have sex in your driveway. She'll leave you alone.

Answer 2

yes, she is a pain in the butt, but she also seems lonely. Try inviting her over for coffee and cake. You might actually enjoy her as a person as you get to know her. You'll feel better and she won't be so lonely.

Hello In There
by John Prine
originally from the album "The Divine Miss M" Bette Midler

We had an apartment in the city.
Me and my husband liked living there.
It's been years since the kids have grown,
a life of their own, left us alone.

John and Linda live in Omaha.
Joe is somewhere on the road.
We lost Davy in the Korean war.
I still don't know what for, don't matter any more.

You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in there. Hello"

Me and my husband, we don't talk much anymore.
He sits and stares through the backdoor screen.
And all the news just repeats itself
like some forgotten dream
that we've both seen.

Someday I'll go and call up Judy.
We worked together at the factory.
Ah, but what would I say when she asks what's new?
Say, "Nothing, what's with you?
Nothing much to do."

You know that old trees just grow stronger,
and old rivers grow wilder every day,
ah, but, but old people, they just grow lonesome
waiting for someone to say,
"Hello in There. Hello."

So if you're walking down the street sometime
and you should spot some hollow ancient eyes,
don't you pass them by and stare
as if you didn't care.
Say, "Hello in there. Hello."

Answer 3

well, i wouldnt say she is being nosey but it isnt right that she asks stuff like that on your message machine. u also have to understand that old people NEED to look outside because if they die soon they i am pretty sure that they would want there last view to be outside. Try being a friend with her so she doesnt feel so lonely and u should offer her some food. I had do do the same thing. Oh yeah i forgot to tell you that u SHOULD mention to her that she shouldnt watch you guys. watch how u talk to her !!!

Answer 4

Is your nieghbor lonely maybe? If she is maybe she is trying to spark a friendship (the wrong way). Even if she is not lonely, she might just want a friend, and maybe you could talk to her sometimes or go over there with a baked good or something sweet and talk to her about how you are feeling. You can let her know you feel a little uneasy about her always knowing what is going on in your household... but she just may be lonely, or she could be one of those nosey neighbors who must know EVERYTHING (I had one of those neighbors once) but just casually bring it up in topic if she is bothering you... I think she is just being harmless myself, but elderly women or men sometimes need a friend to talk too, and maybe she just doesn't know the way of coming out and sparking that friendship in other ways. I hope this helps!

Answer 5

I have a neighbor EXACTLY like that, but it's an old man and not an old woman. I urge you to plant some bushes or install a fence. You may also need to get a little snippy with her; for example, regarding this incident, your husband may have said, "Mrs. (Jones), I appreciate your concern, but my wife and I BOTH do chores around here. If I need you to keep an eye on my house when we're on vacation, I'll ask you. However, I'd appreciate it if you'd just let us live our lives."

Answer 6

Feeling observed like that is something that bothers me too. I think it's typical of people who don't have much going on in their own lives, such as in the case of some 70-year-olds. There is a retired couple who comes to my work (a restaurant), and watch us all work, and listen in to conversations if they can. Grrr. I guess your options are to either put up with it, tell her (politely, I hope) that feeling observed makes you uncomfortable, or if possible, build a tall fence in between the two houses.

Answer 7

I think she is being a little nosy but she might be just reallly lonely and need some company. Does she have any family. Maybe you shoud invite her over for a barbaque or something she might be the best thing you have been missing. She could become someone you can count on.

Answer 8

Let me give you a little advice...Be thankful that your little old 70 y.o. neighbor is nosey...she is actually watching out for you and the other neighbors...Alot of crimes have gone solved because of people like her..that watch the neighborhood...even in their old age they are not afraid to come forward if they know or saw some illegal activity...Imagine,,,(god forbid) if anything truly happened in ur neighborhood and all ur other neighbors who dont care never saw anything..but this lady did....she will be able to help the police...so dont take it wrong...be grateful...that she is constantly watching...I wish I had a neighbor like that...Id love her

Answer 9

Yes, she is being nosey. I had a neighbor like that once. Start paying attention to the things she does and make comments right back to her and see what she says. If she makes a comment like you should mind your own then tell her thats how you feel about her.

Answer 10

I don't think she is being too nosy...maybe she really cares whats going on. and perhap you should try being freinds with her, she might be a little lonely. She might just not know how to get started to befreind with you. Give her time she'll probably stop. Well you'll be old someday. Maybe you'll do the same thing she is. If she's really a bothersome just ignore her! She'll get the hint.

Answer 11

Honey, yes, she's being nosy. That's what older people do when they are lonely. Trust me just be patient with her, and maybe give her a call every now and then. Just because she doesn't live alone doesn't mean she isn't lonely. You may not believe it, but when she's gone, you'll miss her. Maybe not all the time, but there will be days that you will