Who should pay more?

Question

I've recently married and my husband and I have an issue with whom should pay more household bills. I'm very old school and my ex-husband use to pay for all the household bills and I basically paid for my own expenses. I understand that times have changed and I understand that we have to help each other pay for the bills. We have seperate checking accounts, by my choice and joint savings account. We have seperate checking accounts because we are both big spenders and it's easier for me to keep track of my expenses. I also don't want to be explaining why I spent money for this and that and vice-versa. Here is the problem, he thinks that we should pay everything 50/50, but he makes double of what I earn. I don't think it's fair to pay half of the household bills when his check is fatter than mine. What do you think is a fair percentage for each of us to pay the household bills?

Answer 1

Maybe a more diplomatic solution is to compare what your husband makes to what you make, and use that ratio as the multiplier to determine who pays how much? This way, you can both say that you EQUALLY contribute the same amount as a percentage of your own income.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Perhaps i'm the only one that's gonna say it but .. if you to are fighting about money already, things are doomed from the start. It's supposed to be marriage - a combining of the souls/hearts/minds/bodies .. lives. You still retain your individual identity, but are now apart of each other. So who cares how much the other makes? Does it really matter - you still own a house, a car or 2, eat food, have utilities ... etc. The "money" needs to go in a single place to pay for those. And really, there is no such thing as 50/50 in a marriage ... it's 100/100, and that includes money too. The amount he makes plus the amount you make equals the amount the marriage makes. Think of it like that and then discuss how you two together will use it.

So, a little compromise might be a good way to go... 1. Get a joint checking account. Keep your two separate accounts active.
2. Make a budget for each month that pays all your bills, and gives X amount of dollars to each of you to spend on whatever you want. That way you both get the same amount to spend - and that is equal and fair, and the remainder goes to savings for retirement and/or fixing up the house .. or a rainy day .. etc.

Now, the main account pays the bills. Your X amount goes into your separate checking accounts. That way you can spend it however you want, or save it for a rainy day - what ever you'd like. Then, what ever is left, move that over into high yield savings or money market account.

Have a good one.

Answer 3

When I met my guy, he had a savings account and I had a checking account. I made more than him at the time, but we had agreed up front that, once we moved in together (which we did last November), we would get a joint checking account at his Credit Union and use that to pay the bills. We would both put money into it, splitting the bills pretty much 50/50 (except the car payment as I am the one that drives it more than he does). Now that I am not working and am looking for work again, he pays for everything. But, that account is still used for our bills. His stuff is paid for from his savings accoutn, mine is from the checking. Once I get another job, I can contribute more. But, neither of us cares who makes more, stays home more, etc. We just split things down the middle. We both use the electricity, water, build up garbage in the cans, use the phone, etc.

I, too, can be a big spender, but now that he is paying for everything, I need to account for eveything I spend so I have stopped spending like I did. He has never been that big a spender, unless it's on his model trains, but he always made sure his bills were paid for, and still does.

So, I believe that you both need to pay for things 50/50 since you both use things that need to be paid for. I don't believe it matters who makes more, but how much you both want to put into the relationship, and this is just one part of it.

Answer 4

You won't like my answer, but why should he have to pay all of the expenses just because his check is bigger, and you be able to just spend yours on whatever YOU want??? That is very selfish. I think you guys need to sit down and seriously talk about finances. 50/50 isn't really realistic, but I have a feeling he tossed that out because he thinks you are using him as a sugar daddy. Make a list of all the joint expenses - mortgage/rent; electric; gas; water; trash; cable; whatever. When you add it up, you should be responsible for about 30-40% and he should be responsible for the rest. Either split the bills that way (like you take the utitilites-he takes the mortgage and vehicle payments) or establish a joint account that you both deposit that determined percentage into for household expenses. Then you will both still have a portion of your income to yourself to do with as you will. Goood Luck!

Answer 5

My husband and I put our paychecks in a joint account, and we pay all the bills out of that account.
We discuss any big purchases before one of us goes out and buys something large, but it's usually ok with the other person because if the other wants something, we agree on that too.
You are in a marriage, which is a partnership 50/50. His money is your money. Your money is his money. And it's all for the common good. Don't be so selfish.

Answer 6

If you use less than half of the household, then you pay less than half. The 50/50 thing sounds fair to me. Punishment for a fatter check isn't right.

Answer 7

Wow... this is a tough one. I hate to say it, but I really think since you chose to keep things separate you may have to live with a crappy situation. You use the house equally, you should pay for household expenses equally. Sorry, honey! I'd love to find a way to be on your side of this one but I can't!

Answer 8

You're the one who wants everything separate, so everything should be split right down the middle - regardless of who makes more. You need to quit your "big-spender" ways and find a way to contribute to your 1/2 of the bills.

Answer 9

You could use what i call trick psychology...everytime you go shopping you can buy something nice for him also. But you need to keep in mind that you agreed to share everything in your life...My solution would be to pay all the bills put the leftover in the bank and save save save...

Answer 10

the bills should be slit 50/50