Should I ask her to get rid of it?
2006-06-07 03:40:56 · 16 answers · asked by Mr. Red 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your wife is sentimental. She may have her old wedding album but she probably also has many, many other collections of memorabilia of your relationship as well. It is obvious the wedding album makes you uncomfortable. Otherwise you would not be seeking the advise of others. You have two options. One, you can ask her to get rid of it which is going make you appear insensitive and jealous. Additionally, you will be adding resentment to your marriage. Do you want your wife to resent you over a wedding album? Your other option is to ask her about it. If she is important to you and this album is important to her, ask her to share with you what makes it so special. This will create bonding and will show her you are really interested in knowing and understanding her. She will appreciate your support and interest. If listening to her story is difficult for you then there are already some esteem or trust issues you need to work out. Have faith that she is yours and yours alone. Showing faith in her will create an open atmosphere of love and respect.
2006-06-07 03:54:12 · answer #1 · answered by lyricsop 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well if she had children in the previous marriage then she should keep it for the kids but if not she needs to get rid of it! The kids could have it when they get older but put it away until they start asking for it. If there were no children involved then I do think there is a problem with her wanting to keep it. Oh, if she was married and the husband died then she should keep it too. Since the husband is no longer alive and he was her husband first then she should keep it to remember him. Obviously she can have him back but the memory is important if he has died.
2006-06-07 10:47:58 · answer #2 · answered by Deanna M9903 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her previous wedding represents a happy time in her life. She should cherish and keep it. What truly matters is how she feels about her happiness with you now. Concentrate on that and her old wedding album will become merely a book about her past, not a disruption of the present.
2006-06-07 22:02:06 · answer #3 · answered by marvelljones 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Treasures as in looks fondly on it by candlelight each night? Or treasures like it's sitting on a shelf in a room somewhere? Either way those things cost a lot of cash, so they should be kept for that reason alone, but it should be kept in a place that is nearly inaccessible to her like the attic.
2006-06-07 10:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No - never ask a person to throw away memories of their past no matter what. Been married 25 years - we both still have photos and memoirs of our past and it doesn't affect anything negatively. There are other people in that wedding album besides her ex. Those people mean something to her or they wouldn't have been invited. Remember, everything you experienced, people you met along the way is what makes you YOU now --- and who is she married to NOW???
2006-06-07 10:45:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that it is okay. I would let her know that it bothers you and maybe come up with a compromise. Such as keep the album at a relatives house. Im with you I dont want pictures of my spouses ex, especially wedding pictures in my house.
2006-06-07 10:57:58 · answer #6 · answered by randella_24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes for the frist question. and no but u might have a thing that u like doing too. so this way u both have something too do by Ur self. it is OK .
oooooooooooohhhhhhhh by the way i would not ask her to get rid of it cause it may cause a fight . when she is lookin at it go and do that thing u like.
2006-06-07 10:50:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her alone.
Weddings are special to women. They're at their prettiest, they were happy, hopeful, etc. She may simply like the way she felt that day and not necessarily be mourning over a "lost love."
Her friends were there. The dancing was good, etc.
Best advice: open it up and look at it yourself. If she's using it as a tool, you'll negate her advantage.
2006-06-07 10:45:35 · answer #8 · answered by William 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you make me think about my man's ex wife. you go to her house (she lives with the bf) and you'll see pictures of her wedding day with my man and also pictures of him!!! she make people believe is because she wants to show her daughter (with my bf)
that she came from a family with love... BS! they had to get married because she was pregnant! plus i think that's disrespectful for her bf and for me too. i dont really care since i have him and we live together but she thinks that being married once give her a "lady status" in the society.... for me she is just a 36 yo. ugly woman with a kid and with a white trash bf lol
so if your wife keeps that photo album is because of the good memories it brings to her. GOOD enough to keep the pics around, don't you think she shouldnt give a crap since she is married to you now? tell her to get rid of it because it's past and she should only care about her present and future with you!
2006-06-07 10:59:43 · answer #9 · answered by chikis 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has a right to have her memories. There is nothing wrong with her having it. Just make sure that he feelings toward you are true, that's all that matters. Don't be jealous about it.
2006-06-07 11:11:18 · answer #10 · answered by kathyjr1979 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋