my boyfriend had an emotional affair (on my space) talking to them many times a day. women calling him and setting up dates even though he says he never went through them. i gave him another chance, if he stopped talking to them and he agreed but it still bothers me and i cant stop thinking about it. im driving my self nuts. he hasnt talked to them in 1 week, i have thought about it less but its still there. should i give it time? or should i give up? we have been together for 4 years.
2006-06-07 03:08:24 · 17 answers · asked by BeAuTiFuL 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Definitely give it time because if you love him at all you will realize that even if it does work out you can at least know you tried and not have to wonder what if.
2006-06-07 03:13:39 · answer #1 · answered by Jack 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
lol women are the best.. all i can say to you is if you can find a guy that is attracted to u and no other that island would be very small and would have no TV. if you are willing to trade in 4 years for a small indiscretion (not even) well it shows how much you value this relationship. Maybe you are looking on a reason to get out.. check yourself. Suppose he had done something more severe would the 'punishment' be the same?... Is this the first person you have ever loved? that is what i am wondering as well and i dont know how young you are either. So if it is and you are young believe me you will fall in love again.
2006-06-07 03:20:05 · answer #2 · answered by dynobrit 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate my bf of 8yrs had a sexual affair with someone, he met at work, this went on for months. Until I found out. She perused him for a while (that's what he told me) until he gave in. I have been a basket case ever since! I'm trying to process this in my head,it has been very difficult. I know I need to get on with my life but, he was a big part of it. I read the im's that they had written to each other and I was heart broken to say the least.As I will be for a long time to come.He has moved out on his own now.We are trying to be friends. However, I love and miss him very much so, I know how hard this is for you. You will never erase the past, remember the good times,that what I do now.I will always love him and hope is
2006-06-07 04:45:13 · answer #3 · answered by SpecialLdy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your sure about this "EMOTIONAL AFFAIR" which i think that there is no such thing, it is either you are having a physical affair or not, things for you to think about is, is he a popular person to have many friends male and female (notice i say friends) these women that call are they many women or one woman, does he leave the room when he gets the calls, are these calls recent or have been going on since you've known him, do you have concrete proof or over jealous, once you answer these questions honestly you ll know if he cheats. also remember before he met you he had friends, its unfair to stop him from communicating with his friends because your jealous. is he offended when you meet or talk to your friends? how do you know that dates are being set up? does he tell you?
2006-06-07 03:36:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's NOT looking for something that you can't give him!!! - That's BS. When someone cheats, it usually has nothing to do with the person they are in a relationship with, but rather their own restlessness and doubts. That's something he has to work on internally. There's nothing you could do or not do to make him more committed. (Given the fact that i don't know you or your relationship)
You have two choices - you can start working on yourself to really, truly forgive him for his emotional deceit, or if you, in your heart, know you just won't be able to let it go without reminding him of this then let it go. It's not fair to either of you to continue if you won't be able to move on.
BTW, people usually go through with the my space dates 1/4 of the time. If he had 10 girls who were saying they were going to meet him for a date, he probably went through at least 2 of them.
Sorry :(
2006-06-07 03:19:27 · answer #5 · answered by avlin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys are much more physically and visually oriented than women. The emotional affair, I suspect, didn't mean that much to him (but in your mind it is a huge betrayal). He, as we all do, was seeking validation that someone else found him attractive and that he still had "it." While not defending him, I think you should not let this matter hit you so hard. He did not consummate the affair and that says something to me.
2006-06-07 03:14:18 · answer #6 · answered by c_schumacker 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best i can tell you is this LEAVE but if you love him so much, than talk to him, relationships are based on truth and if you dont tell him how much it bothered you that he did that you will only end up getting more hurt. So just tell him, the worse that can happen is or would be that there would be a big fight or he just will leave and he if leaves he wasnt the one for you to be with! Good Luck my friend
2006-06-07 03:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by The-chicken 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it time. It's only been a week. Give yourself time to get over it. And see if he stays that way for longer. Then you'll know for sure if you made the right choice in him.
2006-06-07 03:20:15 · answer #8 · answered by Bugsy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's looking for something that you're not giving him. Pay more attention to him and less time thinking about what's he's done. The pain will fade.
2006-06-07 03:10:24 · answer #9 · answered by kalsmom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
read what you wrote you gave him a second chance. follow through with it. at least he didnt take it further. give him the chance and if he doesnt follow through dump him. but make sure your giving him the time he needs also.
2006-06-07 03:11:49 · answer #10 · answered by sweeetkisses2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋