i wrote this.. what do u think of it??
I woke up from this dream
So sensuous
But ended with a scream
The nightmare of knowing
What you had inside
Was so scared that
At last
It's time to find
The monster of who you are
To which I kept acting blind
Roaring from faraway
Echoes in my head
But I thought it was just a rainy day
& the stray angel
Will find his way
What a fool I could be
Trying hopefully
To do the impossible
To prevent the inevitable
What was I thinking?
To fight for a ghost
But you never know
How it feels to be sinking
In an ocean of deceit
What a life
What a dream
Something so bitter
But tastes so sweet!
2006-06-07 01:11:11 · 8 answers · asked by prettygreeneyes 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Other - Arts & Humanities
Papo send me ur email..
2006-06-07 01:57:54 · update #1
very poetic way to express yourself. sounds like u are talking bout death
2006-06-07 01:15:18 · answer #1 · answered by wedjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, you have put down well, but I feel its not in order, anyways at the end of the day what matters is the power of expression, which you have in your say,
so here I go gal
replying to u
Were you tormented by this
ignoring would have been a bliss
so horrendous it goes
In your words it flows
was that the desire of night
or was it a dream over fight.
why din't you wink your green eyes,
the monster could have appeared a pleasant surprise.
anyways its nice..... ha ha
hey can we share more... I have my work all dumped in my notebook, & iam at office working now.
I kind of liked your work .....
can v make up more,
do you mind disclosing your ASL to me.
2006-06-07 08:32:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its too twisted and plays no order. Try putting in breaks and making it more understanding. You have the imagination for your writing but need more skill in writing. Keep trying!
2006-06-07 10:38:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good. Sounds like you have had an epiphany.
2006-06-07 10:58:23 · answer #4 · answered by Dee_Dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
really pretty...
u having a hard time? koz that is a bunch of feelings u got going on there...
2006-06-07 09:53:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats deep and twisted,, nice poem... are you feeling guilty about something?
2006-06-07 08:16:19 · answer #6 · answered by ann d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love it... real beautiful.
2006-06-07 08:31:08 · answer #7 · answered by papo9112001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him go.
2006-06-07 08:17:59 · answer #8 · answered by oldawglost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋