How do i get my self to go away? i know i have to, and i know i don't deserve him. his abusive words really gets to my nerve all the time, but i have developed the tendency to just ignore it, and sometimes pitty myself, other times i shout back. but the problem is whenever i insinuate that i want to get out of the relationship, he begins to imply that it is as if, i was the sole sinner in the relationship and his attitude does not count. he implies that i decided to end it between us, and so it follows that the reason why i want it to end is because i want someone else. and also everytime we fight, he brings out my past relationship, and telling me i will also cheat him like i did before (when i was with my ex, i met this present one and sort of overlapped).
2006-06-06 22:57:48 · 12 answers · asked by soula 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Open door then walk through it and don't go back through it again.
If you don't walk out then anything else is just staying together no matter how you paint it.
2006-06-06 22:59:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was very similar. It was very hard to take those steps to leave. My relationship had gone so far as to come to blows and yet I still covered up the abuse because I thought he would change. I believed it was all my fault. You have already taken a step that took me two years to reach. You told him you wanted out.
Do not allow him to guilt you into staying. You are not the one to blame for his abuse. Placing the blame back on you is simply another tactic used by abusers to try and control you. So far it is working.
My husband actually broke down into tears and begged. He offered therapy and everything imaginable. Therapy seldom works and these promises were proven to be false when he would turn violent days later.
Start looking for an apartment. Contact the local housing authority if you are worried about money. They often offer income-based rent and deposits.
The things you have described are signs of an abusive relationship. They are also the first signs that someone could become violent in nature. Abusive relationships are not always about violence, but more about control. You know you are in an abusive relationship and you know you want out of it. Do not let him change your mind. Things could get worse.
It's a mind game. He's playing it and right now he is winning. The next time he accuses you of leaving him for someone else, inform him that you are not leaving him for someone else, you are leaving him for YOU!
Please feel free to contact me if you need emotional support or advice. my_honest_truth@yahoo.com
2006-06-07 00:00:32 · answer #2 · answered by Ell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, relax n be confident about urself, gal tell her that you dont want him anymore, as he doesn respect you, and tell him you think whatever you wanna think about me, as everybody in the world is free to think, and tell it doesn't effect u even if u think bad about me as you know who you are.
Go for someone who respects, why b in the past which gives u pain, remember only the past which makes you feel happy, destroy the rest if you wanna live happy.
so don't listen anymore as to ur integrity it does make a difference, gal start thinking positive, grow up.
take care, hope things b fine with you soon.
2006-06-06 23:06:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack his bags. Open the door. Throw his crap on the front lawn. Get HIM to leave. He's the abusive one. Or if you think it'll be easier to go yourself, then pack your stuff and walk out the door. However you do it, don't look back. Look forwards toward your new life.
2006-06-06 23:28:17 · answer #4 · answered by smurfette_au2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you get so sick and tired of hearing this man run his mouth and accuse you of things and it brings you to the point where you can't take it anymore, leaving will be easy to do. How can you stand his mouth and bad attitude day after day?
2006-06-07 00:35:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you gather all of your things together find aplace to go before you leave if you cant go to womens shelter and you rid your self of him do not make contact with him nor leave him your number but a simple note telling him you are never going to return and now are free to live your life with happiness,be strong and live the life you always wanted
2006-06-06 23:31:43 · answer #6 · answered by treatau 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
PACK YOUR BAGS
SAY GOODBYE--OR NOT SINCE HE'S SUCH A JERK
AND LEAVE!!!
WALK OUT INTO THE WORLD AND FEEL THE WIND BLOWING THRU YOUR HAIR AGAIN AND THE SAND UNDER YOUR FEET---U'LL BE A FREE WOMAN LIVING HER LIFE AND DISCOVERING A NEW WORLD EACH DAY U GET UP IN THE MORNING.
SO GO FOR IT!!!
2006-06-06 23:04:59 · answer #7 · answered by KITTY 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it might sound strange but actually love to be treated badly. if you wouldn't you would have left ages ago. what other reason is there to still stay?
try to get out of you behaving pattern....
2006-06-06 23:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by 42 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just pack ur bags and leave. Cause his an jerk to be treatin you like that.
2006-06-06 23:31:51 · answer #9 · answered by *QeEn-BeE* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
really i read ur story he is really a arogant man.U get rid of him
as early as possible and come with me
2006-06-06 23:05:39 · answer #10 · answered by Sachin T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋