How do you handle a person who is the opposite from you and your are not on drugs and they are and they say they will never stop for no one, he has been doing this sisnce he said 13, i said it's time for a change. i maried him not to change him but i guess my hrmones was in the way when i was pregnant and he sweep me off my feet. It is not his child but he came too me so nice and he loved both my children at the time. he still do after 6 yersa but he has a bad anger problem he smokes not at my house but out, he can't hold a job for only 6 months or less he tension spand do not last long if he does a job, he will not finsh what he started until weeks later. what should i do yes i amd starting to pray faithfully now but shoud i let him see that he is going to loose a precious wife who cares for him.
2006-06-06 18:33:15 · 13 answers · asked by girlmiddle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why would you hook up with someone that is the totally opposite of you? I know we all make mistakes. You have children that you have to think about. If this man can not keep a job, this means that your children will have to go without the basic things. I know he's nice but he's not willing to change and you can't change him. Maybe you should leave. What I have found out is that you can pray but if that person does not have the desire to change, it probably will not happen. Pray for strength in your mind to do the right thing for you and your children.
2006-06-07 04:04:51 · answer #1 · answered by kitcat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really don't know why you are staying with a man that not only put you in jeopardy but your kids safety as well. Not to mention I can only imagine the emotional strain it must be putting on the kids and you as well. A person that uses drugs sometimes have to hit rock bottom before they realize what they have been reduced to.so you have to actually leave him for him to see the light. If you love someone that much then you have to know when to let it go and if it was meant to be then it'll come right back. Pray and turn your life over to the Lord and he will lead the way and provide the strength and understanding that you need to get through this.. GOD is the TRUTH and the LIGHT so keep the FAITH!!!!!!!
2006-06-07 01:49:09 · answer #2 · answered by reeseusps 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's really sad but all the things you listed are probably an affect of doing drugs for soooo long i understand your concern but know that your praying thats all you can do you can't force him and since he said he won't change you need to do whats best for your kids do you really want him as their role model your rite forget the hormones theres more to a relationship lots more especially when kids are in the picture Example: just say you need to go some where really fast and you have to leave the kids with him he high or gets high while your gone and something happened to your kids? or lets say he is driving with them in your car gets pulled over and arrested for possesion meanwhile you have to fight defax to get them back. don't try to think this can't happen that crap that he never smokes at home is crap i used to think the same thing but going outside or smoking in the garage is the same thing and he does it in the house when your not there believe me. My x was a drug addict it's sad to see someone flsuh their life down the toilet but your keeping him from hitting the bottom if you move out of the way and stop trying to better his life thats not your responsiblity do you want a husband or another child i say leave and let him grow up he'll have too then and you really should think more about being a precious mom husbands and wifes come and go but those kids have only one you God holds you more responsible to take care of them after all they can't do it themselves your husband is suppose to be a grown man rite if not he already broke the vow.
2006-06-07 01:47:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't think anybody has the answer but God really, and so that's why not only praying for you and your spouse, your kids, but you also want to listen, take the time to listen to His answer. Not on yahoo answers here, but from Him. If you truly give it to Him, and let it go, you will get clarity, in time, God's time. I don't think anybody can sit here and judge you or say things because nobody is on your journey but you and God. So I would say just keep on praying and do what you then hear back, what is in your gut, your heart, He'll let you know!!! I know the way I grew up in an addictive household with an alcoholic father, I would never get into that myself nor be married to somebody who was. Instead I married a workaholic. It has gotten better over the years, we both have worked on it, together. We even seperated, we were finished, but God let both of us know, in His way, that we weren't, time,love and patience will tell you. Good luck! I will say extra prayers for all of you.
2006-06-07 01:44:42 · answer #4 · answered by Laurie S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, how long have you been living together in that situation?
From your story, the first thing that I noticed was you married him for the wrong reasons. If you are a Christian, you must have forgotten the biblical teaching about not being yoked with unbelievers when you decided to marry this guy. See what happens when people do not follow God's commands? I am not here to judge, but I see your marriage with wrong foundations. If it were that way and things are happening this way with your life now, try to do as much as you can to win back your husband. (When I say win him back, I mean discourage him from his vices, and then encourage him to surrender his life to the Lord for his own salvation and your family's peace)
If he responds positively, give him a chance...
After all efforts have been exerted and nothing happens, then I say it is best for you to let him go. This may be hard for you, but you also have to think of the welfare of your kids and of yours as well. Don't wait for things to get worse and something happens that you will regret for the rest of your life.
Finally the best thing for you to do is KEEP ON PRAYING WITH STEADFASTNESS.. and continue to DRAW YOUR STRENGTH FROM THE LORD. He sees your heart.. and I believe that He'll help you find a safe way out of your present situation.
2006-06-07 01:46:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek counseling and help for this. Buy the book the Power of a Praying wife by stormie Ormartin... It is a great and helpful book and encouraging and they sell it at places like Walmart and other book stores. Lay him on the alter and trust God for him and for your marriage. You just continue to work on yourself and being the wife you need to be to and for him! There is a website at http://www.marriagetoday.org that may be helpful to you and i also have a yahoo mail group at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/letstalkmarriage I am here to help in any way that i can and to be a christian friend to you through all of this..... You can talk to me anytime. Also ask him to go for counseling and marriage counseling too but if he chooses not to then be strong and get the help for yourself that you need!
2006-06-07 07:42:50 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray, Pray, Pray, and Pray, do not enable him to do the drugs, don't lie for him,don't give him money. I am not sure about where you live but I know here, in IL, you can get the parents even of an adult, to enroll them into rehab. drug centers. But, unfortunetly, unless he wants to become drug free, it won't work. He needs to feel the love of God in his heart and be high on life. When you pray ask God to come into his life and open his heart and mind. Good Luck and God Bless
2006-06-07 01:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by rqtpie19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay fervant in praying if it doesnt offend him read your Bible in the same room as him go to church and allways stay a good wife show him Gods love through you He is the only One that can change him . but dont push God or religeon on him just show him how dedicated you are to him and God , and allways be a good example . Oh and try to get your kids to pray for him. hope i helped Jesus Loves You
2006-06-07 01:42:47 · answer #8 · answered by floweronfire2 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God wants us to be equally yoke to one another. Yes we all make mistakes, but you have to take yourself out of this situation before he hurts you and the children. Seek God for counsel, and at the same time get out before its to late. I'm praying for you
2006-06-07 07:36:58 · answer #9 · answered by tcnb1234 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell me why you married him when you knew all this about him. Oh yea you must have been in love hahahahahahahahahahaha.
2006-06-07 01:38:18 · answer #10 · answered by windyy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋