what do you do when your gut feeling tells you something just is not right and your being lied to by a loved 1

Question

my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 yrs in the beginning I cheated with my x husband I admited my wrong and we well I thought moved on now I found a condom in the boyfriends golf bag I found e-mails from 2 females thanking him for going to some party and when I confrented him he blew up and brought up my wrongful doings so whta do I do I love him but I can't be lied to either we have kids and that just makes it harder to decide what to do please help me I'm so confused... Help

Answer 1

It's always a tough call, when children are involved. It sure looks like he is cheating on you, as the evidence proves. He didn't deny it, either, just brought up your past transgression.
You need to ask yourself the question, can you live with him, knowing the facts as you do, and what will it do to your children, if you are unhappy every day.
It may be rough and tough, but I think, if he won't stay true to you, you have little choice but to leave.
You might ask him if he is willing to see a counselor, and work through your problems as you did before. It may not work, and if he says no, then your choice is clear.
Good luck, it's not a happy prospect.

Answer 2

It is hard for him to except that you told him you sorry that a excuse to do what he want to do by throwing up the past. he need to let that a long and if he want to get out there and cheat and leave condom around so you can see them it sound like he just don't care about you and what might happen if you found them and the e-mail because it a way to do anything without letting the other know about it.

Answer 3

Oh boy, tit for tat. Why did you tell him in the first place? I'll never understand that. If they don't know you should live with the guilt rather than screwing up their lives as well as everyone else's. That being said, he's lying. Get out while you can. It won't get better-neither of you trust each other and how can anyone live that way? You both have reasons not to trust so every time one of you walks out the door the other is always going to be wondering.............

Answer 4

he's probably defensive because he's busted. yes 2 years ago you cheated, he decided to stay and work it out so it is in no way grounds for his screwing up now. believe what you see, why on earth do you need condoms for golfing? and what party was he at and who are these women? if your relationship has survived infidelity before then you know that these questions must be answered, if he refuses to answer them and behave in a way that shows regret and remorse its because he doesn't feel those things and you know to end it because he's a dog and thats that.

Answer 5

When you get the feeling something is not right, it's probably because something isn't right.
Staying with him is another matter, pesonally I wouldn't stay in a relationship where there is no trust, but changes in your lifestyle such as separating are typically not easy.
Best of luck.

Answer 6

Your gut is never wrong. And he will obviously throw this up in your face as long as you stay with him and use it as an excuse to do things behind your back. I think it might be time to leave.

Answer 7

I can't stand a liar! If he lied to you once, he will again. Sit down and tell him to come clean with you, then when he does, decide what your next step should be, Good Luck!

Answer 8

If you love him forgive him. Make him see that you are going to give him three chances to change, but if he keeps on cheating on you dump him and say that you can't live with a liar.

Answer 9

If he acted like that then he is proudly guilty of something. The most important thing in a relationship is trust and if you guys don't have it, u'll never get it.

Answer 10

You need to tell him to keep it moving. I don't think you should stay even because of the kids. They will have to get over it. This decision will be up to you.