How do you get a really, really cute guy to notice you?

Question

He's smart and hot and Im kind of dumb and weird looking
(I can finnally admit it!!!!!!!!!)

Answer 1

You have said very little about the guy in question. It sounds to me like you may have a LOT of thinking to do before you take any action at all.

First of all, why exactly do you want his attention? The reason I ask is that this will have a very big effect on the strategy you adopt. If you are just looking to spend some time in nice company, it would be wise not to get emotionally or physically involved. It will only lead to heartbreak for one or both of you.

You could ask him out, but it has to be very clear to both of you what your intentions are and aren't, in order to avoid any possibly tragic misunderstandings (e.g. date rape) - again, a good reason to think about all this beforehand.

Indeed, it would be wise to delay emotional involvement until a moment when you feel ready for a permanent relationship, and until you know enough about what you are looking for in a potential permanent partner/husband to be able to measure him against your standard, and find that he fits.

And there is much to be said for delaying all physical involvement until after you are actually in that permanent relationship (some, perhaps even most people call it marriage). The reasoning here is to ensure that when you do get emotionally or physically involved, it will have the right meaning, because once you've done those things, in a very real way, there is no turning back.

Indeed, let me point out: the relationship where people leave their parents, commit to each other permanently, and become physically one is one in which God joins people together. This is why Jesus said 'What therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder' - telling us why we should not break up once we have taken this step.(1)

The reason I mention this is that it therefore makes very good sense for you to above all take care of your relationship with God (and make sure the man you have your eye on is doing that too).

OK, now let's say you feel you might want something more serious. Take an inventory of what you want in a potential permanent partner. Think 'the type of guy I would want to live with for the rest of my life'. Talk to people you know and trust who are already married to find out what sorts of general characteristics 'work'.

Observe many different people and relationships - not just ones that are attractive, but also ones that aren't. Ask yourself 'Why does this person or relationship appeal to or seem good to me?' or 'Why doesn't this person or relationship appeal to or seem good to me?'

Think about what is involved in a relationship, ask yourself, 'Do I really want this? Is this something I can do? If not, what do I have to do to correct that? Is *that* something I can do?' etc., until you are sure that you really want to be in a relationship at all. If you come to a point where you realize you don't want to be in a relationship right now, don't move forward.

But let's say you've decided this is what you want, that this is something you really can do. Now, and only now, are you ready to make a start. Before you take any action to attract the guy's attention, try to find out what he's interested in. What groups does he belong to? Is any of this stuff you would find interesting? If not, take that as a warning and don't go any further unless you find something later that you do have in common.

If there is some evidence of common interests, figure out how you can get involved in some kind of activity in these areas, a group situation where you can discreetly observe him and figure out in what measure he fits the profile you came up with earlier. Again, if he significantly falls short, does not have some really important characteristic(s), don't go any further.

But let's say, for the sake of argument, that he turns out to be a really nice, good, honorable guy, with more enduring values than just appearances, possessions, etc. As you find out what his values are, you will get more and more ideas of how you can get to know him better, what kinds of situations you can observe him in, what kinds of things you might want to read up on so you can talk knowledgeably with him about his interests.

So, for starters, you say he's 'hot and smart'. What makes him hot? Is it, for example, that he has that sense of personal style? There is certainly nothing wrong with making an effort to discover and cultivate your own style. Surf on the Net, observe your surroundings, try on various ideas and combinations and see what works and what feels good. Make sure the ideas you adopt contribute to rather than detract from your own self-respect. After all, you want him to respect you too, right?

You also say he's smart. This would tend to imply that this is a guy who prizes the life of the mind. If you are serious about attracting the attention of such a person, you need to be cultivating your own mind and interests. Independently of his, because he will want to hear more than just 'Yes, dear' from you. He will want someone, yes, off of whom he can bounce his ideas, but also someone who will introduce new ideas to him.

But you will of course need to go a good deal further than that, both in your observation, and in your cultivation of your own life. For if you want to have a good partner, you need to first of all *be* one. And as you get to know him, it'll snowball, it'll get easier and easier to build your life and find out what you need to know about him.

And if the moment ever comes that you think it could make sense for you to be spending time alone together, to talk about stuff that you might not talk about in a public forum, then you could consider simply asking him to spend time with you. By that time, you ought to know enough about him already to know where a good, interesting place to spend that time would be. I would make two points here:

1) Make sure the place is suited to what you actually want to do. This means that if you want to talk about personal things, the movies might not be a great idea, because you'll be too busy watching the movie;

2) Even more important, you ought to know what your moral standards are, because particularly the first time, you want to make sure it's a place/situation where there basically isn't even the possibility of anything happening other than that which you believe to be right.

And if you think he would think this is 'too square', take that as a warning and don't go any further. You need to have enough respect for yourself to stay out of dead-end situations from which no good will come.

Otherwise, I wish you all the best! God bless you.

Answer 2

First you gotta change your look girl! You must take good care of yourself, a little bit of vanity is good for everyone. It doesn't take much work: just a new haircut, a light make-up, and some sexy clothes, ask your friends some help on that. This way you will feel better with yourself, feel more confident and pretty, than you'll can get anyone you want. Believe, self confidence is the key!

Answer 3

First of all never call yourself dumb because that isnt true. The first step to getting a guy is by loving and respecting yourself. A guy wont like a girl who is insecure and who feels sorry for herself. Tell yourself that you are beautiful and if this guy doesnt see that then someone else will. After you feel that you have better self esteem, then do what all girls with good self esteem do when they like a guy.... Flirt, smile and laugh at his jokes, he should get the point that you like him.

Answer 4

if being yourself doesn't get you noticed then show a little skin just enough to catch his eye.but don't make yourself look like a....... well I think you know what I'm tryin to say.if you feel like your dumb and weird then he probally does to.have confidence in who you are and let no-one tell you otherwise.you are beautiful just because you are a woman.we are one of the greatest creation that "God" has made,so hold your head up smile and strut your stuff with confidence in knowing who you are!!!
good luck

Answer 5

Make eye contact ... let 'em sparkle! Just don't be someone you're not for the sake of meeting a guy... it would never work out anyway. Learn this one thing while you're young: Be yourself!

Answer 6

well be out going and flirt with him

its hard to say other wize cuz guys like diffrent things

but if you laugh at him and notice him he will notice you (people like to talk about them self)

n a t e

Answer 7

Just be urself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

there's not anything sexier than a confident person, don't pretend to be someone else u think he might like, be urself; its so hot to be with someone who knows what he wants and is not afraid to show it.

Answer 8

FLIRT!! Be girly, dress nice around him, not slutty or sleazy, compliment him, take pride in ur appearance!

Answer 9

Buy him a drink first and just lick your lips !

Answer 10

you must be yourself and don't try to do anything that you don't somethng special just for him and then tell him how you feel.

Answer 11

make a loud, screeching noise. he'll notice.