My husband and I have been together for 5 years...Our relationship since day once has been really bad..He verbally and emotionally abuses me to the point where my self-esteem is to the ground...It's always about his friends and he doesn't pay much attention to me or my 4 year old daughter...His own family has told me that he's cheated on me in the past...When we started living together I was a virgin so just the thought of him messing around with someone else really upset me...N-E-wayz so his nephew which is 5 years younger than me started living with us...We got along really good right away...To make a long story short his nephew pays attention to me and understands me in wayz that my husband never has...My husband and I got in a big fight one day, I ended up leaving home and well I slept with his nephew...Now a month and a half afterwards my husband and I are back together..My husband is acting alot better now....everytime we get intimate I think about his nephew..what should I do???
2006-06-06 07:52:08 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Call the Jerry Springer show !!!!
2006-06-06 07:56:05 · answer #1 · answered by gozedown 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abusers don't change! They only disguise their true nature. Yeah, they seem better for a while, but the demon in them that causes them to be abusive always rears it ugly head... eventually. Yes, you cheated on him. If you still think of the nephew, is it because of the warm, tenderness he showed you when you felt unloved and hurt by your husband, or do you have stronger emotional feelings for him? If you do, how do you feel about your husband? Still, you need to decided which road you're going down and stick with it. Married to your husband and remaining faithful to him until death or divorce? Or divorce him and then look for other men.... or the nephew. You can't keep two men... not even in your mind.
2006-06-06 08:19:16 · answer #2 · answered by sweet_harmonie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confess it and begin to BUILD(not rebuild because I dont think anything was ever built) a relationship with each other. IF thats what the BOTH of you want.
Sounds like there is a ton of immaturity going on..rather than communicate I will just be abusive or I will sleep with someone showing me attention rather than tell my husband how I feel. I understand he has probably shut you down emotionally.
I would also suggest some marriage counseling. Again..thats IF you guys want to fix this. My heart goes out to the 4yr old. All this will affect her in more ways you can imagine..
2006-06-06 07:58:02 · answer #3 · answered by Hoops Mcann 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand your situation. I been there, sortof. Yes, what you did was cheating. That said..I understand why you did it and there are lots of women out there who have done what youve done. If youre not getting your needs met and youre being mistreated it leaves the door WIDE open for someone to come in and say the right things and before you know it youve lost your head and gone with it. I think you at least owe it to your husband to tell him about what happened...but not alone one on one. Try to get him to go with you to a counselor and tell him there so there will be a mediator there who can explain the situation to him and explain your behavior. If he is not willing to get counseling and do whats best for your marriage and your family, maybe the best thing you could do for yourself and your daughter is to get a divorce and move on. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. I wish you all the best of luck. I hope this helped you,
2006-06-06 09:16:08 · answer #4 · answered by Mia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow tough situation! Sounds like your heart is with the nephew already so what are you debating about REALLY? The morality of it? Yeah thats pretty bad because it seems like you wanted to get someone close to your husband so that if your husband finds out, he would be REALLY hurt because not only is his wife cheating but his trusted nephew betrayed him.
2006-06-06 08:04:12 · answer #5 · answered by boomerang3que 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first off, you should have found if he did truly cheat on you. Then you should have left him after that. But you should not have slept with his nephew because he understands you more than your husband. Y'all need to sit down and have a long talk about this.
2006-06-06 07:56:35 · answer #6 · answered by ladia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow it is a miricle, he is all better now and will stay that way for every, I am sure that you have nothing to worry about now, maybe you can bang the nephew on the side and keep your wonderful, loving companssionate husband!
2006-06-06 08:00:33 · answer #7 · answered by buxomkity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out of the marriage and get away from the abuse! But do not lust and commit adultery as this is as wrong as the abuse and two wrongs dont make a right and definitley do not lust after his nephew! Seek help and counseling and like i said get out and take your daughter with you! But if he has changed and is not treating you badly anymore then work on your marriage and seek counseling and help and marriage counseling as well!
2006-06-06 07:58:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to divorce your husband. Then if you want to mess around with his nephew go ahead, but for now, STOP! You wouldn't want your husband to sleep around with one of your family members, would you?
2006-06-06 08:01:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you label this "Would you consider it Cheating?" With what you described, what else would you call it. It is cheating, you are a cheater. No matter how bad he treats you or if he cheated in the past it does not excuse your acts. If your marriage is bad, leave it. If you are not smart enough to do that then just put up with what you have decided you want.
2006-06-06 07:58:58 · answer #10 · answered by muffie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it's cheating, but what you need to do is leave your husband i don't think he'll be growing up anytime soon. but dont get with his nephew either, that's just a pile of drama that you dont want. and your child needs you more than anyone so be the best mom you could be and that means to not please yourself first.
2006-06-06 08:02:30 · answer #11 · answered by ♥Miss X♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋