Sleep issues for a 10 month old?

Question

My son is doing it again...he's waking up around 2:30am and crying and thrashing in his sleep. Nursing isn't helping as he pulls off after a few minutes and continues to cry. I do not want to be used as a pacifier (bad habit), but I will not stop nursing him. Is anyone else having this issue? We have been up walking, rocking, swaddling, etc from 2-4 for the last three nights and I don't think we can take much more of this. I do NOT believe in having them cry it out though. He also refuses a bottle...

He gets fed at dinner and then a 'snack' (eats until he's full) before bedtime...then nursed to sleep. He's full when he goes to bed (average of 10pm is when he falls asleep).

We do pull him into bed with us, but he still cries--cosleeping/bedsharing, whatever its called--he still cries and thrashes.

Answer 1

my son also was like that he started again when he was around 9 months. I didn't know what to do, and still can't give you any advice because he just finally stoped. Give it time.

Answer 2

Some babies are really out-of-sorts (including crying) when they are coming down with a virus. If this is the case, you may never know because nursing him may prevent him from ever actually getting sick.

It could also be that he is approaching a developmental milestone. If in 3 days, he starts walking, and then he sleeps better, you can be pretty sure that this is the cause.

Maybe he's too warm or too cold. Or maybe his clothes or the bedding is uncomfortable. It could be too light in the room--try darkening it entirely. Or, it might be too noisy for his tastes; if you can't eliminate all noise, try a white noise machine (a cheap option for this is an electric fan).

Could he have food allergies? If you have starting giving him a new food (or even just a new *brand* of something), he may be having a reaction. Try eliminating it and see if things improve over the next week or two.

Good for you to *not* let him cry alone. It causes the release of cortisol, a stress hormone, even *after* he is no longer crying, and that means that calories that he needs for growth and development will instead be burned to combat stress. It also teaches him that when he is young and defenseless, the people who love him the most won't help him when he needs it. Crying in the arms of a loving parent (or cuddled up next to a loving parent) is *not* the same thing.

Sometimes, there is just no obvious reason. I remember hearing a pediatrician saying that his patients' parents always want him to be available for the baby--even overnight--but that they (the parents) aren't always willing to do the same for their *own* child.

And, just one more comment... He *isn't* using you as a pacifier. A pacifier is an inanimate object that is used to replace a *human being* when taking care of him isn't practical for some reason. A *person* is always preferable to a *thing* when caring for a baby. When he is a teenager, and his friends tell him that something (maybe drugs?) will make him feel better, do you want him to use the *thing* or come to you (a *person*) for help? Nursing is a *good* thing--no matter how often he needs you.

Answer 3

I am assuming that since he is 10 months old that he is already walking and speaking somewhat, and that toilet training is beginning or completed.

I am also assuming that, given his age, your desire to continue nursing is more for you and not him. I would imagine he is already starting on other foods that satisfy him with a supplemental bottle; i.e., juices, cereals, fruits, some vegetables, etc. The "binky" bad habit you wrote about can also be transferred to the "nursing" bad habit; when your breast becomes the "binky" or pacifer.

How many teeth does he have? How active is he walking, talking, and socializing with other children? Is his bed by a window where bugs can fly in? Do you have a house pet that might have fleas? Is he allergic a newly introduced toy, pillow, soap, or lotion? Is there a pillow or blanket with feathers in it that may be sticking his face when he turns over?

If he is not being potty trained, maybe he's telling you that the diaper thing getting wet in the middle of the night is really annoying---"Can we get rid of this thing, Mommy?"

You've put four pretty big restrictions on answers because of what you will not do; i.e., giving up nursing, crying it out, not introducing a supplemental bottle. Unfortunately, those three things are most commonly the solutions. So, if you are "NOT" going to try those solutions, then I would suggest you have a very long road to hoe.

I am a mother, foster mother, grandmother. Been there, done that, bought the video, own the T-shirt. I'm sure you'll do fine.

Answer 4

There could be another reason besides hunger that he is waking. If he is pulling off after nursing and crying I would say that he has an upset stomach. Did you change your eating habits? It could affect your milk, also has he tried something new? Usually it's something that has changed in the average routine and if you can weed out what is different that might explain his discomfort. Does he have reflux? That causes pain, and bubbles that really hurt them. You can try some mylacon drops or mylanta. You can get the ratio for his weight from the doc. Poor little man, I hope he feels better soon.

Answer 5

My parents gave me the hard way, I was just like him. He needs to accept a bottle or a pacifier would be perfect. The habit will go away at 3 or 2, depending when you stop giving it to him. But if you dont want to do that,

1.See if hes hungry, let him "eat"\"drink" untill he stops (babies sleep good on a full stomach)

2. Is he in the same room as you? If so move him to a different room.

3. When he cries after you have nursed him, let him be. Hes just going to do that everynight if you always rock him. He WILL cry himself to sleep close his door and your door cover a pillow over head, you will be good. If I an not best answer, please try this anyways


*~Ashley Jones~*

Answer 6

Is he teething?? My 9 month old is teething like crazy right now and, although he doesn't wake up in the night, he will only nap for 20-30 minutes during the day and he wakes up. I am almost positive it his his teeth bothering him because he is cutting a couple right now.
If you are sure he isn't teething then I would check with your pediatrician for some other causes. Understandable that you don't want your nipples to double as pacifiers....are you planning to start weening him to a bottle? You may want to try giving him a bottle during the day and then maybe he will be more receprtive to it at night. Not to replace nursing, but as another option.
Good luck!

Answer 7

Ok try milocon drops maybe he has gas..otherwise..with my son we finally had to let him just get up and play for a while. it took a little while but we got him to start playing and then falling asleep on his own.. another trick we have a celing fan and he can get to the light switch on the wall and he turns it on and watches it ... I think part of the problem with nursing is that they get food soo much faster from other things that they some times go through a stage when it's not as convient.. Try giving him baby yogurt before bed..it's made with whole milk and it stays with them longer so they are more likely to sleep through the night. I am still nursing my son..he turns 2 in 4 months.. you'll get through it!

Answer 8

Sounds frustrating. I would suggest doing what you're doing. I would maybe comfort him without picking him up though. I understand your concerns about letting them cry it out. I would suggest nursing him if he wants. Put him back to bed and go back every 5 or 10 min, but don't pick him up. Rub his back, so he knows you're there. Try not to talk though. The less stimulation the better. Picking him up and talking will confuse him that it's time to get up, and it will wake him up even more. He will probably cry, but it's not like he's crying it out... like you've just abandoned him. You're still showing him that you're there. The crying is just protest because he doesn't want to go back to sleep, or be in his crib. But of course, you know best whether he understands that or not. Don't give up, it will pass. God Bless

Answer 9

If you don't want to let him cry it out then maybe you should consider bedsharing? I think he just wants to be with someone.

When it came down to it, I wanted to bedshare less than to let my daughter cry it out. So she cryed it out and she's sleeping from 9pm-7am. It took about a week but for me it was well worth it.

Those that I know who bedshare say that it's well worth the peace of mind to have the child right next to them and everyone gets a good night sleep.

Answer 10

what time is he gonig to bed? What time is he napping? Have you tried changing him the moment before you put him down. I have a good friend who's son refuses to sleep the night through if his diaper isnt changed before sleeping.

I think you've expressed the most of your options. If it were me i might try to let him cry it through, but thats not an option for you, i think you need to just accept that this is his schedule right now. You can try changing it by moving his nap/bed times around a little.