Do the marriage vows really mean anything anymore in modern societies?

Question

My wife and I are in the processing of divorcing after being together for 18-years (married for 16 - two children). We had an unpleasant marriage for most of those years mostly because we didn't get along even though we loved each other and had a great sex life: the main problem was that our lifestyle values were very different and that we were not respectful or considerate toward each other.

Now the marriage vows state - "For better or worst, in sickness and in health, till death due us part." If you marry before God and make a promise to your spouse to live according to those vows, at what point does that promise lose its meaning? Aren't a couple supposed to work together to solve all problems? To me the vows are more as follows in actuality: " For better (90%) or worst (10%); for richer (60%) or poorer(40%); in sickness (5%) and health (95%); till death due us part (0%). What do you think?

Answer 1

Marriage vows should mean everything when you say them even today... They are a vow made before God and to each other. God as the center of a marriage is a very important part and key to have in the marriage.... Makes all the difference in the world. Yes couples are supposed to work on the marriage and seek marriage counseling and help. I feel that all of the things you have stated it beind better worst for richer for poorer in sickness and in health should be 100 percent in all things things including till death do us part... The word divorce should not ever even be in a marriage dictionary or an option unless it is a biblical reason like adultery and fornication and i feel also abuse!

Answer 2

Hi, i'm sorry to hear your marriage isn't going so well after such a long time being married or being together for 18 years. I'm only married for 1 year and 7 months. I can tell you that it wasn't easy to live up to our marriage vows. That story I will share to you next time.
To answer your Q : ''Do the marriage vows really mean anything anymore in modern society? '' my answer is ''YES'' and ''NO''. It all depends on the person who is making the vows. You see the society made rules and regulations called law. These laws in a way help the individual think of ways to break their vows. What I'm getting at is that countries with ''divorce'' gives individuals the choice to break their sacread vows. Helping people to easily forget and break thier word of honor and the reason why they got married in the first place. The meaning of marriage vows really lies in the strength of character and personal upbringing of a person. I'm a Catholic and from a country where we have no ''divorce'' instead we call it annulment. Annulment Isn't easy to get and it takes lots of tidious and carfull scutinization before it is granted. Also takes a lot of money to begin with. So not so many people get divorce and remarry. But just the same they separate without the legal papers.
So there, in modern society marriage vows lifeline all depends on the strength and values of the individuals making them.

Answer 3

Don't base it on society --- what matters is both of you doing what it says.... if you made mistakes correct them --- it's your marriage and it's never too late to improve it or redo it --- I read about a man and a woman that allowed God to work in their lives (they had divorced) and both still loved the other but they didn't respect each and both worked long hours to have a very comfortable lifestyle.... to make a long story short they put aside the materialism and disrespect and learned to value what was important - they learned respect, patience and communicated their inner feelings - resolved issues and they healed the brokenness and got remarried (to each other)

Answer 4

Whats the deal with the percentile? You either do or you don't... those are yes or no questions. I think that its all a matter of how hard you are willing to work. Its easier to be lazy and get a divorce. Its also easier for people to get married in order to be faithful than to stay in a long term relationship without a contract. I find that people don't take marriage as seriously as they should.

Answer 5

I've had to remind myself of my vows many times over. Marriage is hard work and it isn't always plesant, but if you really love each other just think of those vows when times are tough. Because, life is ever changing, nothing stays the same!

Answer 6

Yeah, I think the social way of marriage is very very important. Usually guys don't want the girls to be married, they want it as living together, because if a guy gets married with a girl then he have to share his properly with the girl according to the court rules and regulations. So it really is a good way to fool the girls, in this way there is no risk of money but you can always have fun.