我的英文日記，麻煩大家幫我訂正。

Question

I'm student of Aquatic Bioscience my name is Yu-Zu Chang
Last week I went to Tung Shin with my friends.Because their teacher
let my friends to teach English.So we went to Tung Shin Long Gang
Elementary school.And my friends have to teach those students English.
After class,we played with students and ate lunch with my friends at
school.
And when the afternoon.We went to Tung Shin Fishman's Whart.We saw
the setting sun at Tung Shin Fishman's Whart.It was very beautiful.And
when we back dormitory.I felt so tired,so I have a good sleep.


中文翻譯:我是水生系的張御族
上個星期.我跟朋友去東石.因為我同學的老師要他去敎英文.所以我們就去了東石的龍崗國小.然後我朋友開始交那邊的學生英文.
下課之後.我們跟那邊的同學一起玩，然後順便在那邊吃午餐.
下午.我跟朋友一起去東石於人碼頭.觀賞夕陽.納邊實在很漂亮.等到我回到宿舍之後.我實在是非常的累.所以我就睡的很好.


我的英文老師要我上台報告自己最近的生活.所以我打算報幹這一篇.但是...我的英文不怎麼好.所以麻煩各位幫我訂正文法+改錯字或是稍微修改文章一些........

PS:其實我朋友只是去那邊當英文志工(老師叫他去)，然後我在敎國小一二年級的學生ABC.....Z而以.....(我也有順便敎一些)

Answer 1

I am a student of Aquatic Bioscience, and my name is Yu-Zu Chang. Last week, I went to Tung Shin with my friends. Because my friends' teacher wanted them to teach English, so we went to Long Gang Elementary school in Tung Shin. 我會拿掉以下這一句 因為你在之前就已經說你朋友是去交英文:[(And my friends have to teach those students English.)] After class,we played with the students and ate lunch with my friends.

During the afternoon, we went to Tung Shin Fishman's Whart. We saw the sunset over there. The sunset was very beautiful. When we came back to the dormitory, I felt so tired; therefore, I slept well that night.


我有幾個給你的建議:

1. 英文句子最好不要用 "And" 當頭。 你可以用以下的字來代替"and": (in addition,) , (also,) .

2. 一個句子裡面一定要有一個 "動詞" 跟 "名詞", 這種有動詞加名詞的句子才是一個完整的句子。

3. 如果一個句子要以 "Because"做開頭的話，後面要有一個結果。
如: Because I was hungry, I ate an apple. ←正確
Because I was hungry. I ate an apple. ←錯

{Because I was hungry,} 是 原因
[ I ate an apple.] 是 結果

懂了嗎? ㄏㄏ 你應該有學到一些東西ㄏ
希望幫到你
不懂問我

2007-12-30 21:09:31 補充：
不要用 "And" 當開頭是因為 "and" 是用來連接一個句子裡的兩個想法。 所以"and"適用在句子的中間。
例: I went to a house and a park this afternoon.

"and" 是這樣用低

中文跟英文差蠻多的ㄏㄛˋ?

Answer 2

I'm Yu-Zu Chang, a student majoring in Aquatic Bioscience.
Last week, my friends were asked by their teachers to be volunteers for teaching English in Tung Shin Long Elementary School. I also wanted to give some help, so I went with them. I mainly helped some lower form students to recognize English alphabet. After the lessons, we played with them and had lunch together.
In the evening, my friends and I went to Tung Shin Fishman's Wharf, where we totally immersed in the beautiful scenery of sunset.
When I went back to my dormitory, I was so tired that I went to bed immediately.

Answer 3

My name is Yu-Zu Chang.

I am a student major in Aquqtic Bio-tech.

I had a trip to Tune-Shil with friends.

It was a good chane for me to practice English with them.

We visited Long Gang ( Dragon Harbor ) elememtary school.

The most intersting thing is one of my friends taught the school childrent English , he( she) was really cool!

After class, we played with the childrent happily and we had lunch together.


We went to Tung Shin Fishman's Whart in that afternoon.

We had a great time.

It was a bit little late, we sat on the stones around the warf watching sunset. How beautiful it was!

After I got back to dormitory, I was exausted and fell asleep soon.

Answer 4

I'm a student of Aquatic Bioscience. My name is Yu-Zu Chang.

Last week, I went to Tung Shin with my friends. It was because my
friends were arranged to give an English lesson to the students of Tung Shin Long Gang Elementary school.

After the ending of the lessons, we played with the students and had
lunch at that elementary school.

And we went to Tung Shin Fishman's Whart . The
sunset was very beautiful and we had a very good time there.

when I went back to my dormitory. I felt so tired and I went to bed
immediately.

我想這樣好一點 錯誤比較少

2007-12-30 20:40:59 補充：
And we went to Tung Shin Fishman's Whart that afternoon.

Answer 5

感覺你的連接詞用的不得宜!!
Because~~~~~~~~~~~~~. SO~~~~~~~~~
英文 "因為" "所以" 不可以一起出現~~~~~