請大大幫幫我，幫修改一下這篇英文!!!3QQ

Question

各位高手，以下的文章是講我戀愛的經驗，
我寫的文章沒有什麼說服力和立足點。
可以幫我修改一下英文作文嗎？謝謝 20點
The most unforgettable experience that has led to my frustration may be breaking up with my ex- boyfriend. I still could not forget him though missing and souvenirs are useless. Many years ago, I fall in love with a boy Named Chen. He is my first love.I did not forget this experience with Chen. In my 16 years old, I met a very good friend through the Internet. I met his brother Chen accidentally. We were having many good memories together before we broke up. A true heart seemingly to be the best way to understand each other. As we came to know each other more and more, we become to know each other gradually and be lover. We fell in love very fast. In that time I hoped I could meet him after finish the school everyday. I felt I was very contented and the world was so great in that time. We went to the cinemas and shopping all the time. The days we had before were wonderful; Chen gave me many happiness and good memories. To our surprise, we found that we shared several interests’ feelings. I liked watching the movement of sky, so did he. He liked the spray by the sea, so did I. Both of us loved the natural world deeply. Prosperity not often, after have mutual understanding with Chen. I realized Chen deceived me by carrying on a sexual relationship with other girls. I realized that he is a womanizer. Chen can not get involved in a relationship.
I separated with him when I found Chen carry on a romantic relationship with my best friend. I have just realized that we no longer need each other. Love with each other is easier than live together. It is impossible to avoid conflicts when dealing with other people. Without each other we might have a better life. It might be I did not have any experience on it, so I did not know how to make a good relationship. After the first love I wish I might learn experience and grow up. Actually I did it, I have a boy friend which I have this relationship for three years and love each other deeply.

戰哥可以在文章後面.幫我增加內容好嗎

Answer 1

The most unforgettable and heart breaking experience of mine was breaking up with my ex-boyfriend. My memories of him hurt me too much, and I try very hard to let it go. He was my first love. I was 16 years old when I met him though the internet and become very good friends. His name is Chen. We started going out and have a lot of fun time together. At the beginning of our relationship, I wanted to see him after school everyday. It was the sweetest and best time of my life.  We went together watch movies and shopping all the time. Those days were wonderful. Chen gave me many happy and wonderful memories. As we get to know each other more and more, we were madly in love with each other. We found we shared a lot of common interests, perspectives and feelings.  We both enjoy observing the blue sky and the movement of the clouds. We both love to watch the weaves of the ocean. We love the nature sights. Our relationship did not last. After a while, I discovered that Chen cheated me and having sexual relationship with other girls. I realize he can’t be faithful in a relationship, but involve several girls at the same time.A honesty is best way to understand and trust each other. I separated with him when I found Chen was in romantic relationship with my best friend at the same time. I realized that we are not meant for each other. It is easier to be in love than maintaining a love relationship. It is impossible to avoid conflicts between us. It better off that we go separate ways and stop hurting each other, and we probably have a better life with out each other. I think I was too naïve in my first relationship and it’s was my very first love relationship. After that heart-breaking experience, I learn to grow up. And now, I met my true love. We are very much in love with each other, and together for three years now. My boyfriend and I are looking into our bright future together and continue to be in love for a long time.

Answer 2

gs71099's is better.
文章沒有什麼說服力...
try to express what you have learned from your first love experience, how cheating can hurt the feeling and relatioinship, what are the positive impacts of the previous experience on your current one, etc.

2006-11-30 04:05:27 補充：
You are right on gs71099's "too many errors".

But to me, his is better (just my personal 2 cents... nothing personal) by simply glancing through two replies … not a rigorous comparison or judgment though.

2006-11-30 06:10:58 補充：
The most unforgettable and heart-breaking experience of mine was breaking up with my ex-boyfriend, whose name is Chen. He was my first love. I met him on the Internet when I was 16. Soon, we became very good friends due to our common interests, perspectives, feelings, chemistry and dreams. We started hanging out and had a lot of fun memorable time. Together, we watched movies and went shopping all the time. We both loved to watch the ocean waves and the natural scenery. We both enjoyed observing the blue sky and variations of clouds (sounds silly, huh!?). Some say love is blind and I can fully understand that. During those early days of our relationship, Chen was in my mind almost every minute (or second). It was the sweetest and happiest moment of my life. The more we knew one another, the more we felt we were meant for one another forever. We fell in love, madly and blindly.

Good old days did not last long though. After a while, I discovered that Chen cheated on me and had a romantic (or sexual) relationship with my best friend (or other girls). How could he treat and hurt me like that? How could he be so unfaithful in a relationship? How could he destroy my trust and respect for him?

Honesty is the best policy in many facets in life, including in the love relationships. I realized that we could not be together any more. With a broken heart, I left him right away. I learn that it is easier to fall in love than to nurture a love relationship. A relationship needs to be built based on honesty, trust and mutual respect. After such heart-breaking experience, I learn and grow up. Now, I have been having a steady and healthy relationship with my true love for three years. We are in true love. We nurture our relationship as a couple as well as an individual. We are looking forward to our promising and bright future.

Learn from the past, treasure the present and hope for the future.

2006-12-05 00:09:42 補充：
of course, with the 3rd one added ... gs71099's is not the best ...

ha ha ...usually this voting system can't choose the best one... that's the sad thing of this system ...

Answer 3

My most unforgettable and frustrating experience may the break up with my ex- boyfriend. Many years ago, I fell in love with a boy Named Chen. He was my first love and I have not forgotten what I experienced with him. When I was 16 years old I met a very good friend through the internet, whose brother, Chen, I met by accident. We had many good times together before we broke up. It seems that a true heart is the best way to understand each other. As we came to know each other better and better, we gradually became lovers. We fell in love very fast and at that time I hoped that I could meet him every day after school. I felt very content and the world seemed so great back then. We often went to the cinema or shopping together. The times we had before were wonderful and Chen gave me much happiness and many good memories. To our surprise, we found that we shared several interests. I liked watching the sky and so did he. He liked the spray of the sea and so did I. Both of us deeply loved the natural world. However, I realised that Chen had deceived me and cheated on me with other girls. I realised that he was a womaniser and cannot be in a monogamous relationship.

I separated with him when I found out that he was having a relationship with my best friend. I just realised that we no longer needed each other. Loving one another is other is easier than living together. It is impossible to avoid conflicts when dealing with other people. Without each other we might have had a better life. It might have been the case that I did not have any experience so I did not know how to be in good relationship but I hoped that from this first love I could gain some experience and grow up. And that I did; I now have a boyfriend with whom I have been in a relationship for three years and we love each other deeply.

2006-11-26 22:40:09 補充：
Sorry, 我打錯了.是'I separated from him...'不是 'I separated with him'

2006-11-29 11:50:07 補充：
How can gs71099's be better? It contains too many errors.