急~可以幫我檢查一下我的文法嗎??...英文高手們請進^^”

Question

In my opinion, I think to rebuild the community needs each resident’s effort; it’s not only the duty of the organizations, but also the duty for everyone. For example, I believe every visitor who has ever been to Chinatown, he or she must be impressed by its odor and sewage in the ground. Is this the duty for the government? No,I think this is an attitude problem that it is the responsibility of all Chinatown community to keep streets clean. People should change their attitude and have a more vested interest in the community, so that they treat it as if it were their homes. And community organizations could also play an important role in educating people to keep the neighborhood clean.

If everyone who lives in Chinatown can do their best and get together, I really believe that Chinatown recoveries from the severe situation is not just a dream.
I hope next time when I go to Chinatown, I can proud of its delicious food, clean streets and historical tourism. .

這是我寫的一段文章, 但是不知道我這樣寫是否有錯..又找不到可以幫我修正的人...所以請各位大大幫幫忙...拜託你們了..這對我很重要!!!....贈15點唷!!...感激不盡!!!

Answer 1

In my opinion, 「」 to rebuild the community needs 「every」 resident’s effort
前面有 in MY opinion，所以不用I think every比each好
「It’s」 not only the duty of the organizations, but also 「」 for everyone. For
再開始個新句子比較好 the duty前面說過，可省
example, I believe every visitor who has ever been to Chinatown「」 must be
「」的主詞是every visitor，不需另用he or she當主詞
impressed by its odor and sewage in the ground. Is this the duty for the government? No,I think this is an attitude problem 「that」 is the responsibility of all Chinatown
用 that代表就可以
community to keep streets clean. People should change their attitude and have a more vested interest in the community, so that they treat it as if it were their homes. And community organizations could also play an important role in educating people to keep the neighborhood clean.

If everyone who lives in Chinatown can do their best and get together, I really believe that Chinatown 「recovery」 from the severe situation is not just a dream.
用recovery就可，不然recoveries的話後面is要改成are
I hope next time when I go to Chinatown, I can proud of its delicious food, clean streets and historical tourism. .

建議修改地方為「」處。

2006-11-16 15:17:22 補充：
I can proud of => I can 「be」proud of ，漏了這個

Answer 2

非常感謝兩位大大的幫忙唷...^^...

Answer 3

In my opinion, I think to rebuild the community needs each resident's effort; it's the duty of not only the organizations, but also everyone in the community. For example, I believe every visitor who has ever been to Chinatown, he or she must be impressed by its odor and sewage on the ground. Is this the duty of the government? No,I think it is a problem about the attitude of people in Chinatown to keep the streets clean. People should change their attitude and be more concerned about the community as if it were their homes. And community organizations could also play an important role in educating people to keep the neighborhood clean.If everyone who lives in Chinatown can do their best and get together, I really believe that the recovery of Chinatown from the serious situation is not just a dream. I hope next time when I go to Chinatown, I can be proud of its delicious food, clean streets and historical tourism.