marriage and kid

Question

i married three years ago and my husband never admired me in anything. He blamed me for being stupid,fat,immature,,not risk-taking adventurous........Whatever I do,he blamed. The way I clean the house,do the laundry,wash dishes.......Now he said he wants kid. If you were me,will you?Can you love someone who never shows respects to you and force yourself to have kid?

Also he is 55,no money,he intends to rely on me for the kids expenses? Is it fair? What should I do? Because every time, I argue,he immediately blames me for being stupid and hurt my

dignity.

i am 43,also too old to raise kid

Answer 1

now, 3years like that
then, 13 years like that also
after 13 years SAME

i told you, he will never change; the way you can change this situation is LEAVE

pls note that DO NOT use a child to KEEP relationship, WRONG WRONG WRONG

remember : he will never change, even 30 years later if he can live......

TRUST ME

2006-10-25 00:45:15 補充：
43 is a serious age to have a child AND you don't need to take a risk to have this chancewhen he is 13, you are 56, his father 68; both of you, cannot teach & control himtoo many problems raise up when he is 13; both of you are old lady & gentleman

Answer 2

You got the answer. You are unhappy and wanted to quit the marriage.
Don't think of having kid if he will not be a responsible father. He is 55 and the kid will grow up to 20 when he is 76. You are the only one to raise up the child. I guess you are 30+ or 40+.
You don't have to stand for such an insult in your everyday life. By your writing, you are able to live by your own. You can live independently.
Ignore all those objection from your family about divorce. They never understand the frastration you have.
Don't be a broken-hearted people. Tell yourself you are strong (cause you can stand for such a husband for 3 years). Tell yourself you can live alone (cause you are expected to raise up a child alone if you have one!). Tell yourself you will be more happy after divorce (cause it's the only chance you walk away from current situation.

+++ if you love your husband so much, then you can think of the alternative below. Try to change yourself. For all the critics he mentioned, think positively. Try to figure out how to improve yourself be a better wife. He will find that you changed and will be happy.

Also, tell he straight away that you don't judge yourself FAT. You just need happiness in the relationship, FAT doesn't meant problem to a relationship. Fat people can be happy. Tell him to stop telling you that you are fat.

Answer 3

Without mutual respect, I doubt whether how long can you rmarriage exist. I would seriously consider about having kids.