急...贈20點...拜託高手幫我修改一下文章..

Question

我自己想的中文翻成英文，幫我看有沒有文法錯，修改一下...感激不盡...
我有兩個工作經驗都和教學有關。第一，教游泳。有些女生學游泳因為有肢體的接觸，所以會害羞，在找教練的時候就會選擇女教練。第二，在補習班當老師。我教學的對象是讀小學三年級的孩子。我的老闆認為女老師比較有愛心、耐心、細心和責任感，所以我的同事都是女生沒有男生。藉由我自己的工作經驗，我認為女生在工作上還是很有優勢的；並沒有什麼男女不平等，女生也不是只能當個家庭主婦。
I have two work experiences to all have relation with teaching. The first, teach the swimming. Some girls learn the swimming, having the contact of the body, so will feel ashamed, and will choose the female coach at the time of finding the coach. The second, be the teacher in the cram school. The object of my teaching is to study in primary school the grade three child. My owner thinks the female teacher is more good-hearted, the patience, elaboration and responsibility, so my colleagues are all girls to have no boy. By my own work experience, I think the girl has the advantage on the work still very; having no men and women\'s inequality, the girl is also not only and can be a housewife.

謝謝大家的幫忙....我真的要給最佳解20點的...但是我現在才發現變成5點...我不是騙子啦...>

Answer 1

大概看了一下後 覺得……… 似乎有點像是機器翻的～
很中文似的英文～
修改了一下～ 請看看吧～

I have two work experiences all about teaching. The first one is teaching swimming. During swimming, some girls concern that they will have body contact with the coach, so they all tend to find female coaches. The second is being the teacher in the cram school. All of my students were in grade 3 of elementary school. My boss thinks female teachers are more good-hearted, patient, scrupulous and full of the sense of responsibility, so all of my colleagues are girls. By my own work experience, I think women still have the advantage on work. There is no inequality between men and women. Women are no more housewives.

Answer 2

我有兩個工作經驗都和教學有關。第一，教游泳。有些女生學游泳因為有肢體的接觸，所以會害羞，在找教練的時候就會選擇女教練。第二，在補習班當老師。我教學的對象是讀小學三年級的孩子。我的老闆認為女老師比較有愛心、耐心、細心和責任感，所以我的同事都是女生沒有男生。藉由我自己的工作經驗，我認為女生在工作上還是很有優勢的；並沒有什麼男女不平等，女生也不是只能當個家庭主婦。My two work experiences are both related to teaching. The first one was swimming teaching. Some ladies would choose a female coach to learn swimming because of being shy to have body contact. The second one was teaching in a cram school. I taught three children who were in the third grade in a primary school. My employer considered that female teachers are kinder, more patient, and more careful with much responsibility. That's why all of my colleagues are all females. My own working experiences have made me realized that females are prior to males in those two jobs. It is needless to say that there is any fair problem between males and females. Beside, most females are able to do more than merely become housewives.

Answer 3

I have two years of working experiences on the teaching field. Firstly, I had taught swimming in the past few years. During swimming lessons, some girls may feel embarrassed due to body contact. Due to this reason, mist girls prefer female coaches. Secondly, I had taught in a crame school. My audiences are grade three students. My manager believes that female teachers have more patience and love for students. From my working experience, I believe that in the teaching field, females have an advantage of males.