徵求英文高手幫修英文自傳

Question

內容如下....請求各位大大幫忙修正文法部分和單字錯誤的部份....謝謝!

Introduce oneself
I am the birth in a hospital jaguar, receives the parents with good care, the health grew up. In study process, I have many friends, I studies in the process luckily to have them to accompany. My family member has father and mother and a younger brother, the father is company\'s manager, mother is the housewife, my father he is an affable father, I have the difficulty time, He always helps me. My mother is a gentle mother, she cooked food in the kitchen every day, and she must process the family work every day, my younger brother he and I easy to be together. My family lives very happily every day，I am very lucky birth in the such good family.
Studies in process, I learn much knowledge and processing question\'s method, I am lochih high school students, because I was particularly interested in computer, I choice Information, in studied process, emphatically in related computer practical knowledge and technology. In school first year, teacher teaches us disassembles and assembles the computer, teacher attentively instructs us, because we usually strengthen the practice, I obtains repair computer technician Class C.
In school second year, Increased the new curriculum, let me studied much new knowledge and the experience, In summer vacation,
we make art museum a visit to some place, in visit process, I realize artistic the esthetic sense , teacher severe instructs us, because we usually strengthen the practice, I obtain network erects technician Class C.
In school third year, we prepare studies before to study the knowledge, teacher attentively instructs us, studies repair computer technology and manufacture overhaul card.
I hope I can strengthen my computer ability so that I can acquire more knowledge and technology. I would be very grateful if I were granted the opportunity to major in Translation at your university. I would give every effort to study well in order to meet the university\'s requirements and expectations.

這些是自己的打的

Answer 1

Introduce myself自我介紹
I am the birth in a hospital jaguar(jaguar是豹的意思，或許您可以套用這個句子：I was born in 2 July, 1990，日期您可以填出生年月日), receive(第一人稱動詞不用加s ) the parents with good care, the health grew up.(也可以這麼說When I was a baby, my parents pay lots of attention for me, so I grew up very health.) In study process, I have many friends, I study in the process luckily to have them to accompany (I am luckily. During my study period, I make many friends who I studied with.這樣的型式，您可以參考看看). My family member has father 、 mother and a younger brother. My father is a company's manager, and my mother is a housewife. My father is an affable father, I have the difficulty time, he always helps me. (My father always helps me, when I have problem.) My mother is a gentle mother, she cooks and does housework (家事) every day. My younger brother easy to got along with me. My family very happy(或許您可以參考這個字harmonious和諧的；融洽的) every day, I am very lucky born in the family such as this.
During study term(或是period，期間), I learn lot of knowledge and how to handle the questions(如何處理問題). I am lochih (這是學校名字的羅馬拼音嗎?) high school student, because I was particularly interest in computer, so I choice Information(是資訊管理系Department of Information Management，還是資料處理科Data Processing?) which emphasize relation between computer practical knowledge and technique.

2006-03-04 15:10:31 補充：
The first grade at school, teacher always teaches us disassemble and self-assembly the computer, teacher attentively instructs us. I practice very hard so that I obtain repair computer technician Class C.

2006-03-04 15:11:16 補充：
The second grade, I add new curriculums, so I studied more knowledge and experience.

2006-03-04 15:12:06 補充：
In summer vacation, we make art museum a visit to some place, duration of visit, I realize artistic the esthetic sense , (這段的意思是"我們去拜訪同一座美術館，在拜訪期間，我了解藝術家的美感觀念"嗎?We were visited the some art-gallery, duration of the visit, I understood the esthetic sense of artistic. )

2006-03-04 15:16:49 補充：
teacher severe instructs us, because we usually strengthen the practice, I obtain network erects technician Class C.

2006-03-04 15:17:06 補充：
In school third grade, we prepare study before to study the knowledge(這意思是：我們準備學習之前去學習知識嗎?), teacher attentively instructs us, studied repair computer technique and manufacture overhaul card.

2006-03-04 15:17:33 補充：
computer technique and manufacture overhaul card.
I hope I could strengthen my computer skill so that I can increase more knowledge and technique. I will be very grateful if I could have an opportunity to major(major是主要修的課目之意，也許您可以用study) in Translation(您所指的是翻譯系Department of translation嗎?)

2006-03-04 15:17:48 補充：
at your(這裡套上學校的名字會比較適合哦！) university. I will do my best to learn and did not disappoint to my teacher.(我會非常努力學習，並且不會讓我的老師失望。)

2006-03-04 15:19:35 補充：
真是不好意思，內容太多了，但希望對您有幫助，祝您錄取成功!~

Answer 2

什麼落智- -那是我從學校的網站看的
英文名稱..中文?那再給我幾天的時間補充吧

Answer 3

噗嗤~~~to Helen Fan,太好笑了,Besides,to原發問者,你可付中文嗎

Answer 4

內容說他是Lochih高中的, 發音比較像是"落智"