英文作文 請幫忙批改 謝謝

Question

Music is an important pat of my life
Music plays an important role in my life. because of my talent on music. I learned how to play the piano when I was six. From then on, music is a necessary
Thing with my growing up.
Music is magic when I feel happy to play the lighting song to expose how happy I was. And when I depress to play the soft song may help me feel better. In addition I like to listening to classical music in my leisure time. I think that can extent more temperament. The hip hop music is also my favorite music type, too , because it’s bright rhythm always touched my heart. Music always cheered me up, it really become a point of my life.


感激不禁
謝謝^^

Answer 1

文章主題:錯字 pa"r"t
Music plays an important role in my life ( , ) because of my talent "for" music.
I have been learning how to playthe piano since I was six.
自從我六歲的時候，我就已經在學如何彈鋼琴(用現在完成式表現在還有在學)
Since then , music has been a necessary thing whlie I'm growing up.
自從那，音樂在我成長的過程中一直是件重要的事
Music is magic.When I feel happy , I play the delighting songs to show how happy I am.
And when I feel depressed , I play the soft songs which may help me feel better.
In addition , I like to listen to classic music in my leisure time.
I think that can extent more temperament. -> 這句一定有錯，但因為我不知道你想要表達什麼~所以我無法幫你修改
The Hip-Hop music is also my favorite type of music ( , ) because I am always touched by its bright rhythm.
(＊注意: also = too ~ 所以有too , 就不要有also)
Music always cheer me up. It has really become part of my life.

2006-01-27 14:52:08 補充：
我編號001的，我來修正一下一個地方
我說"自從我六歲的時候，我就已經在學如何彈鋼琴(用現在完成式表現在還有在學)"
這句話將"現在完成式"改為"現在完成進行式"，用現在完成進行式來表示還在學!!)

Answer 2

Music is (part) of my life. 音樂是我生活的一部分Music plays an important role in my life.(可以)(Due to being gifted in) music, I (started to learn) how to play (刪除) piano when I was six.From then on, music (has been  a necessary portion of) my life.Music is (like a) magic (to me.) (When I am up, I usually) play (cheerful) (music) to (show) how happy I (am). And when I (am down), I (would) play soft (music) (to) help me feel better.In addition(,) I like to (listen) to classical music in my leisure time. I think (listening to music)  can (improve my musical skills and talents). The hip hop (刪除) is (刪除, 因為後面已經有too) my favorite type (of music) too, because (its) (vivid) rhythm always (touches) my heart (deeply).Music always (can cheer) me up, and it really (has) become (part) of my life.

Answer 3

你的基本文法要先搞定，幾乎每個句子都有問題。