這是我經過修改後的英文演講稿

Question

Ladies and gentlemen , Good afternoon. It is of my greatest honor to participate in this speech contest. Now before I start my speech, I would like to ask all of you in this room if you have ever though about where the sweetest place in the world is? For many of us, I believe “home” would immediately appeared in our heart without a second thought.

Home is the shelter and the last resort of our soul. It protects us from dangers and offers comfort and love when we are physically or emotionally ill. No matter what the hardest difficulties we encounter in our daily life, home will always be there to support us and guide us. For me, home is like a bank. I save all the love given from my family members in it. Warmth is the interest it pays me back. The more caring I deposit, the more love and support I get in return.
Our family members play an import role in our life. They give us love, hope and support. When we are sad, they comfort us. When we are frustrated, they encourage us. Their love is unconditional, their only intention is for us to grow and flourish.
Unfortunately however, many of us take family for granted. it is very easy for us to throw the anger and pressures we experienced at school onto our family. I do not think it is rational and fair to do so. Instead, we should treasure the fortune that our family is there for us unconditionally, and try to realize how lucky we are that we can share our feelings and frustration to someone and ask for their comforts no matter what.
I remember when I was young, I do not like to stay at home. Because I felt there was no fun in my home so I always preferred to go out with my friends. But as I grow older, I find out gradually home had become more and more important to me and I value it now more than anything.
Home belongs to yourself. Nothing in this world can replace your home. If you don’t treasure it, and let it slip away, then one day it disappeared,
How much will you cost? And which one can replace your home?
That’s all for my speech. Thank you for your listening.

就快要演講了，如果各位還有其他意見的話，也請跟我
說，我這次參加英文演講比賽，只是要求取經驗，得不
得獎那不重要，重要的是整個過程我所學習到的東西，
謝謝大家。

Answer 1

英文亂七八糟等一下過十二點在來貼 ;)

2005-03-29 00:02:07 補充：
注意國語表達不可以直接翻英文
不懂你的意思則保持原文
我已經盡力表達到你最靠近的意思了
加油吧!

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, it is of my greatest honor to participate in this speech contest, Before I [present/begin] my speech, I would like to ask you if you have ever thought about where the sweetest place in this world would be[會是在哪裡?] Well I believe that for many of us there is no doubt that “home” is the best answer to it.

[Home is the shelter and the last resort of our soul(我建議你重新表達因為這不是正確的英文表達)]. It protects us from dangers and gave us love when we are physically or [mentally心靈上;經神上/emotionally] [ill/inured/wounded]. No matter what the hardest difficulties we encounter in our daily life, home will always be there to support us and guide us. For me, home is just like a bank where I save all the love from my family and the warmth is like[就好像] the interest it pays me. The more care I put into it, the more love and support I get in return.
Our family members play a significant[超級重要 唸: sig ni fi cant] role in our life. They give us love, hope and support. They make us feel better when we are upset. They encourage us when we are frustrated. The intention of their love is for us to grow and flourish. Unfortunately, many of us take family for granted. It is very easy for us to put anger and pressures that we faced in school onto them. By doing this, I believe it is irrational and unfair to them. Instead, we should [treasure the fortune that our family is there for us unconditionally(我建議你重新表達因為這不是正確的英文表達)], and try to realize how lucky we are that there are people whom make us feel comfortable whenever we can share our feelings and frustration with them. I remember when I was young I never like to stay at home because it was boring and thus(因此 唸: thus到s) I preferred to go out with my friends. But as I grow older, I realized the significance of home(家的重要性) and that it is more precious than anything.
Home is yours therefore nothing in this world can replace your home. If you have not realized its importance, it will begin to slip away and one day, it will disappear. [How much will you cost? (我建議你重新表達因為這不是正確的英文表達)] And what in this world that can replace your home? Ladies and gentlemen, my speech has come to an end; I appreciate your attention throughout the speech, thank you very much.

Answer 2

Judges, ladies and
gentlemen. Good afternoon. It is my greatest honor to participate in this
speech contest. <=完全沒必要,太平凡,無法取得注意,浪費時間

Before I start to make
a speech (沒必要) I would like to ask all
of you, have you ever thought about where the sweetest place in the world is？Without any
hesitation, I think your answer must be your home. <=Ok

So today my topic is There is no place
like home. <=建議刪除,因為如果你開頭夠好,根本就不用再重複主題,最好是說為什麼家很重要(thesis
statement)

 

建議改寫introduction

 

Home is our shelter, our place of last
resort. It protects us from danger and prevents us from getting ill. No matter
what difficulties you confront, home is always there to support and aid you, no
matter what the problem is.

As for me, home is like a bank, I save
all my family's love and affection in it.
Warmness is the interest it pays me back. The more attention
you give to your family, the more love you will get in return.

 

 

Family members play a significant role in our life. They give us love and
hope. When you are sad, they comfort you. When
you are frustrated, they encourage you (註:不要用will,用現在式) . They won't ask for anything in return.
They just want us to grow up smoothly. Some people think that we can wreak our
pressures toward our family. I think it’s not rational to do so. We should all
respect our family. We may tell them our feelings and
moods and ask for their comforts. <= 這句與其他重複,而且用法不太對,建議修改

I remember when I was young I didn’t like to stay home.
Because I think there is no fun there, so I
always go out with my friends. As I grow up, I
gradually realize that home has become more and more important to me. Without home, one is lonely, without home, one is lost.
Home belongs to you and no one can replace your home, so you should treasure
your home. If you don’t and let it slip away, it would be too late for you to
regret for all the things that you had done wrong. Now I would like to end me
speech with the old Chinese proverb: son wanted to
raise, but parents exist no more. 這句翻譯最好去問你指導老師,不要用翻譯機翻譯 That’s all for my speech. Thank you for your listening 不必要,刪除

 

其他建議:最好有個分開的結尾結構會比較完整

Answer 3

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. It is of my greatest honor to participate in this speech contest. Now before I start my speech, I would like to ask all of people here; Have you ever though about where the sweetest place in the world is? For many of us, I believe “home” would immediately appear in our heart without a second thought.

Home is the shelter and the last resort of our soul. It protects us from dangers and offers comfort and love when we are physically or emotionally ill. No matter what the hardest difficulties we encounter in our daily life, home will always be there for us. To me, home is like a bank account. I save all the love given from my family members in it. Warmth is the interest. The more I deposit, the more love and support I get in return.
Our family members play an import role in our life. They give us love, hope and support. When we are sad, they comfort us. When we are frustrated, they encourage us. Their love is unconditional, their only intention is for us to grow and flourish.
Unfortunately, many of us take family from granted. It is very easy for us to throw our anger and pressures that we experienced at school onto our family. I do not think it is rational and fair to do so. Instead, we should treasure the fortune that our family is there for us unconditionally, and try to realize how lucky we are that we can share our feelings and frustration to someone and ask for their comforts no matter what.
I remember I do not like to stay at home when I was young. Because I felt there was no fun and always preferred to go out with my friends. But as I grow older, I find out gradually home had become more and more important to me and I value it more than anything now.
Home belongs to you. Nothing in this world can replace it. You need to treasure your home, one day when it disappeared, how are you going to find a replacement for it?
“HOME SWITE HOME”
That's all for my speech. Thank you.
幫你做了一些修改看看吧.

2005-03-29 00:08:46 補充：
sorry - Home sweet Home