How can I control my temper?

Question

Sometimes I get so angry and my biggest fear is that one day I'm going to snap and get life without parole. How can I learn control this anger and frustration I have inside?

Answer 1

There are natural supplements that you can try, if you don't want to go to your doctor to see if there is a physical reason for your temper.

Try SAMe and see how that works for you. My husband has a light-wsitch temper and it works great for him, calms him down and things that would normally throw him over the edge roll off his back now.

To be on the safe side, though...check with your doctor. You could have a hormone imbalance or something that you can't self-medicate or treat on your own.

Answer 2

Yes, there are always those moments when you feel like slaughtering someone or yelling until you've lost your voice for weeks... but you have to take control over yourself, so here are some tips!
Steps

1. Realize that things can be handled well at all times; it's just a matter of what kind of attitude you put into it.
2. Be considerate of others, and ultimately, yourself. The way you react will ultimately affect your surroundings. If you have to rebuke someone for doing something wrong, you can always do it calmly, in a private place. This method is always better for everyone in the long run.
3. Realize that no one likes to be around people who get angry easily, and act abusive. The only way you can change the situation is by starting with yourself.
4. Get away from situations where your anger might get the best of you, such as when someone is teasing you. Ignore the other person and walk away. If you must, do this a few times until the person gets the hint that you will not tolerate it. But never use your mouth or body negatively to tell someone that you won't handle teasing or anything of the sort.


Tips

* When you feel like you are about to blow up, count 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and then decide how you will act. This doctor-recommended method has definitely helped, I can vouch for that.


Warnings

* Although it may seem hard in the beginning, you will get it as long as you put yourself into it. No one wakes up one day as a changed person, and you can't learn a new skill in one day...
* ... and yes, learning to control your temper is definitely a skill because not everyone can do it, and it's a great thing to master, good for you and for others.

Hope it helps.Good Luck!!
):-)

Answer 3

Yes, there are always those moments when you feel like slaughtering someone or yelling until you've lost your voice for weeks... but you have to take control over yourself, so here are some tips!


Steps:


1. Realize that things can be handled well at all times; it's just a matter of what kind of attitude you put into it.


2. Be considerate of others, and ultimately, yourself. The way you react will ultimately affect your surroundings. If you have to rebuke someone for doing something wrong, you can always do it calmly, in a private place. This method is always better for everyone in the long run.



3. Realize that no one likes to be around people who get angry easily, and act abusive. The only way you can change the situation is by starting with yourself.



4. Get away from situations where your anger might get the best of you, such as when someone is teasing you. Ignore the other person and walk away. If you must, do this a few times until the person gets the hint that you will not tolerate it. But never use your mouth or body negatively to tell someone that you won't handle teasing or anything of the sort.



I know it may seem hard in the beginning, you will get it as long as you put yourself into it. No one wakes up one day as a changed person, and you can't learn a new skill in one day...
... and yes, learning to control your temper is definitely a skill because not everyone can do it, and it's a great thing to master, good for you and for others. : )



Smile! Ü
Peace Out!

~ Ninja Girl

Answer 4

Anger and frustration are mostly caused by not understanding someone or something.

Before you want to blow up, look up and around you, recognize who or what you are angry with, realize why you want to lash out which is mostly, because you cannot get something or something done.

The reason most likely does not lie with the person or thing you want to lash out, but with the mismatch of the demand and level or quality of supply or response.

How to reduce your frustration level? Become more knowledgeable aout a lot of things, anything constructive, go study get a degre. If you already have one, venture in a direction you have never even paid attention to. Change social levels, up or down. The broader your interaction, the more you realize that everyone is different and has a right to or cannot help being so.

Life is just a conglomerate of interacting elements, influences, compositions that happen at every level; local, regional, national, global. You cannot control anything or anyone, only diminish the effects or risks of unwanted happenings or actions. That is why one speaks of calculated risks, but then how much can you control orminimize those risks.

Understanding these interdependencies, will help you understand your frustrations and help you to be more flexible in accepting the inevitable at a moment in time. It does not mean that it cannot be changed. However, understand that change takes time, effort, energy, sacrifices. We do not have a magic wand to flip and bring about the desired change.

Hope this can help.

Answer 5

I understand. I'm Italian and I'm always keeping my emotions in check. If things get to heated for the best thing to do is go for a walk and think about the situation. Why was the reason I lost my temper? Was it a misunderstanding? Or maybe the other person didn't understand your feelings and you got the short end of the stick. Sometimes it's always good to take a step back and try to see it from the other person. Also anger management helps so that way you not a lifer without parole. The advice is easier said than done. Being Navy you learn to take on board and don't show your emotions. It's control. What you can do to control your emotions. Try it. You might be surprised in what you can do.

Answer 6

There was a young boy who had a temper problem. His father gave him a hammer and a box of nails then told him to go out in the back yard every time he became angry and pound a nail into the wooden fence. So the boy did that. Before long, his box of nails was empty. His father told him to go and take each nail out of the fence. And he did. Then the father sat the boy down and told him that each time he lost control of his temper, it was as though he was pounding a nail into the heart of the people who loved him. Even if he later said he was sorry - and the nail was removed - the holes and scars remained.

If you can avoid whatever it is that causes you frustration, do so. If not, you need to learn to control your temper. For some people, thinking about the little boy with the hammer and nails - and realizing the damage your temper is causing to those around you - can be enough to help you gain control. Everyone gets frustrated and angry at times - that's normal. But since you are concerned about what you may be capable of doing because of your temper, you may need to get some help. Many churches have pastors who are trained in counseling that can help you or check your phone book for other counselors.

Answer 7

What i do is disable myself whenever i get too angry. I basically let the anger get to me but i save it for later. At the base of anger is a fear of loss. Tell yourself right during the anger that the thing you fear is not resolving the fear but creating its own symptoms. Losing control is the result of anger and anger is the fear of losing control.
Once you understand, while angry, then you have a hold over it as it no longer gives an illusion of power in the act.

Meanwhile you may want to try to save the anger for later.
Personally i love going to the gym and knocking the hell out of the punch bag and lifting weights with more desire.
Whenever i have a bad day my gym sessions go better as i have better aggression.
See im deriving a benefit from the anger. A positive spin.
That alone is worth the anger and actually makes me happy which then dissolves my tension.

Answer 8

Ever observed an old steam locomotive? It would blow up if it didn't have outlet valves and functions doing this.

Thus, you need to be practical, logical about your problem. Realize that you have it. Next, determine what causes you to stress up! Don't forget to consider that too much coffee might cause some people problems.

Once you have looked at your problem logically, then find a way to deal with it that bleeds or deflates the problem from the moment it starts stressing you out.

For example, many parents may have problem with their temper when their children go on their nerves. Here, a parent might say, I am going to count from (1-5, 1-10?) and when I reach 5 or reverse 1 then you will be punished so-and-so way.

This permits a non-stressful way of dealing with stressful situations.

Since your question is general, that is all I can suggest. Except perhaps leave the area where stress is encountered early.

Answer 9

It took me a long time to learn how to control my own temper, but my mom kept on telling me how immature I was, and after a while it stuck. Every time (nearly) I'm about to get really angry I think of how immature it would look and what exactly I would be getting angry over, and I would, "Is this really getting so angry about?" Usually the answer was 'no'.

And other times when I got so angry I would say really awful things and hurt others feelings badly and I would feel terrible afterwards when I'd calmed down and then I would have to apologize. Even then, after it's out of your mouth, you can't really take it back. It's already been said and the hurt can remain and sometimes have a lasting effect, so knowing that I could say awful things to people has also kept me from blowing up on people.

To this day it helps me to control my temper.

Answer 10

I used to have this problem and at times I still struggle with it. I have learned from past experiences that when someone moves me to the point of that much anger I walk away with the explanation that I can not get into it right now. Not all people will go with it,. They are like pit bulls and then I just ignore them and keep walking. Rude maybe but later on when I have pulled it together I call and explain why and what had upset me. If they are understanding people and friends they understand if not then I let it go because I do not need people who can push my buttons around me if they do not really care anyway. The big thing is to learn the source of your anger and work it out. Do what it take with someone else or by your self only yopu know if you need professional help. If you are striking oput at people or damaging property then it is time to seek help.

Answer 11

Let it go...we all get angry at one point or another. But anger is a spirit that can take down. Don't let it. Pray against it ask the Lord to deliver you from anger and heal you from where it began. That's a start...How far you let it go is up to you. I learn that taking that same energy stemming from anger and directing it into something good and positive, changed my life too. I concentrate on developing new behaviors by looking at why I get angry, what's really behind it, am I really angry at this person or is it something else going on. When did it begin. Looking into oneself will help you look at the truth and dealing with no matter how much it may hurt. God can heal and take way any hurt or pain. Give Him a chance. What have you got to lose. I hope this helps=)
God Bless You!