I have been a very good friend to my friend since a few years. I am a girl and she is also a girl. I have always been there for her but she was often failed to be there for me.
We used to be alot in touch but then she showed like she is busy with her family, studies and everything but she still tried to be in touch but I felt like a burden so I told her to contact to me only when she feels like I doing and now she does like that only but I miss talking to her alot.
I have went out of my way to be good with her, I response to her very well when she contacts to me but now she gets in touch a little, even though when she is free she does not prefer talking to me, I am a last option on her life. When she has nothing to do better she contacts to me I feel like that. Even though I feel used by her still I want to talk to her and I guess she knows I like her alot. Now my question is being too good with a girl means Am I lesbian? Is she making a distance with me maybe bcoz she thought that.
2007-04-19 04:32:23 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Women's Health
People like you are very hard to find. Its said to know that ur friend has been treating u that way. I think u should move on with ur life, I know its hard to do bcoz u love ur friend but its the bad luck of ur friend that she is losing a very caring friend like u. I think ur the only one in this friendship who has put alot than her. If I had a friend like u I would have done my best to stay in touch. And ya, ur not a lesbian if u dont have any sexual feeling for her.
All the best for ur life.
2007-04-19 07:35:38 · answer #1 · answered by smile always 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no! You are only a lesbian if you have sexual desires for her and actually carry them out, and if you are you are, so what? Your personal feelings are your own, your sexuality is your own, enjoy it. Being good with someone does not mean anything other than that. It may be that your friend is telling you the absolute truth, she may be very busy, family pressures can be a real monster. Life is a weird thing, we each tread a winding path through life and sometimes those paths run together for a long while, sometimes they barely touch. Sometimes thay move apart, it is all part of coming to be and fading away that goes on all the time. Celebrate what you've had, acknowledge the love in friendship. If you love someone set them free, if they return to you they are yours forever, if they don't they never really were.
2007-04-19 05:28:51 · answer #2 · answered by steve_bewers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, being a good friend dose not make you a lesbian. It has become very hard to be good friends with the opposit sex because then people think that your dating, but now that being Bi has become "popular" its hard to be good friends with people of the same sex because then some weird, screw-headed people start to think you're gay! Honestly, Just keep being a good freind. If she ever askes you about your prefrences let the truth be known! If the answer is Yes then answer yes. If the answer is No then answer no.
In the long run, if she is just a bad friend and she stops talking to you all together then it will be her loss and not yours. You'll have memories of fun times during an important time in your life and you'll be able to look back on it and learn from the experiences shared.
2007-04-19 04:44:00 · answer #3 · answered by Kacora 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No dear you are not a lesbian. Any relationship needs patience and understanding to maintain. Friendship is not different. Have you ever spoken to her about how you feel about her or about your doubts. We meet a lot of people, there are many people we like, but only with very few we are able to open up, be honest, and care for them. So u better speak to her. If she doesn't feel the same way as u do about this friendship, get over. You seem to be capable of loving and understanding a friendship. Hope all goes well.
2007-04-19 21:02:06 · answer #4 · answered by DS 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not a lesbian but I think just because you like someone of the same sex doesn't mean you are a lesbian. I like one of my girlfriends a lot but I am not one. I like the way she makes me feel about myself as a person and how she and I interact together, we are on the same page in life but that doesn't mean I am in Love with her. Feelings are sometimes complicated and need to be sorted out. If she doesn't feel the same way you do or enjoy your company, don't be used as a last resort. Find another friend who wants to share their time with you who you can relate to and build that friendship. Friends are a dime a dozen but it is the true friends that you want to keep!! Good Luck and know that you deserve better!
2007-04-19 05:06:59 · answer #5 · answered by monique 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ahhh She is like many people we meet in the world! She sounds like a dumper and a user. Oh and No u are not lesbian unless you really feel for her.
I used to have a friend that did that exactly to me. She was my best friend and I loved her to pieces as she was so cool and we got on so well. The only thing was she would only be with me when she wanted and she would drop me at any moment when she didn't feel like it. It upset me i guess but i didn't care as long as we were friends. After a while i realise that it wasn't worht being with a person like that so i told her what i thought - in a nice way like ohh we are seperating as you like your things and i like mine - and we are friends but not really close like we were.
I think you might have to move on. I know it is hard and i still haven't moved on I think core i wish i was friends with her again as i don't remember what it was like. Just keep on going for a few months and then just tell her that you don't seem to be getting on as you used to. I am sorry to say that ut it is not worth wasting your life, love and time on her if you don't get it back! I hope you sort things out and are still friends!
Good luck!
2007-04-19 05:21:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people like more space then other people. I have a friend who I have known for 20 years. She calls me a lot and is always coming round to my house. I personally would rather she didnt visit as much or call me so much, but this doesnt mean that I dont think anything of her. Shes a really great girl and I think the world of her. I just like a lot of space.
I think this is probably whats happening with this friend of yours and as for you being a lesbian? I very much doubt it.
2007-04-19 05:10:25 · answer #7 · answered by mich 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she doesn't talks to u by herself perhaps bcz ur always there for her , i mean she thinks that u r always there to talk to her ur time doesn't has any value.i would say that if she doesn't talks to u then u also don't talk to her bcz after all ur time also worths don't show her that ur always there desperate to talk to her.be a Lil reserved and try making new friends she thinks that she hold very much importance in Ur life and u don't have any other option than talking to her that is y u r at the last priority or Ur no priority. just what u do is make new friends and don't hesitate to talk to boys then uill stop feeling yourself to b a lesbian.and yes if u r a Lil mean then just talk to her to take out Ur benefits and interest and not when ever u r bored . i mean just talk to her when u have some work with her!!
2007-04-19 04:47:09 · answer #8 · answered by gaurav g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not a lesbian for having a close girl friendship.
It's too bad your friend is not treating you right.
I think you should cut your losses & get a friend, who truly appreciates your kindness. It's going to be hard but why wait to only get the leftovers from a dwindling friendship. You deserve better.
2007-04-19 05:03:58 · answer #9 · answered by Fraulein 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you seem to have numerous concerns about this relationship, which sounds like a bad thing to start with.
Did you give this girl so much of your time and effort expecting her to return it? Are you expecting as much FROM her as you gave to her. As hard as it is, we must try and give to others unconditionally, expecting nothing in return.
Maybe she feels threatened or oppressed by you being so nice. A lot of people can not handle people being nice to them because we live in a verey self serving world.
I shouldn't worry what she thinks. I wouldn't worry what anyone thinks. We never truly know what people are thinking and have no power to change what they think. Worrying about what she thinks will have you going around in circles and you will achieve nothing.
My advice is move on and if she values you she will contact you. Protect yourself, have as many friends as possible and don't expect too much from any of them.
Be kind to yourself and don't worry.
2007-04-19 04:45:48 · answer #10 · answered by samueldisciple 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋