2007-03-20 11:14:41 · 22 answers · asked by cabincatred 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
If the child is living full- or most-time under your roof and is under your care and supervision at least part of that time, you should be able to discipline them when they do something wrong or bad. Though, the spouses should have a serious conversation about it first so that they are on the same page about what "discipline" and "wrong/bad" actually mean.
Kids need guidance from whatever adult role models they have in their life.
2007-03-20 11:23:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I believe if your married and the step child is in your joint home then they're as much your responsibility as the actual parent. therefore you and the mother or father should sit down and come to an understanding of how the child will be raised and disciplined. My wife and I understand that if I'm not around and my youngest needs correction she isn't to hesitate just because he doesn't have her blood. The result has been a very well respected young man of 13 that gets compliments all the time. It hasn't come without some hard knocks, but none the less he's on the right path still.
2007-03-20 11:26:37 · answer #2 · answered by Numbers 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends of the age of the child and the type of discipline being used. The most important things is that the "natural" parent and "step" parent must be in agreement about the expectations of the child's behavior and there should be no difference between what the child is allowed to do or say regardless of which parent is around.
2007-03-20 11:21:47 · answer #3 · answered by nursebetty 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That depends on several things... does the child live in the home with the step-parent, how long has the step-parent been part of the family, what is the offense, what is the other parent's thought, etc. I fully believe step-parents should be able to discipline their step-children ... but it needs to be within the boundaries that the couple have agreed on before hand. Its going to be different for each family.
2007-03-20 11:20:20 · answer #4 · answered by Sonya 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm a stay at home step mom and I do discipline my children if they need it. I've brought them up for 3 years not and they don't even look at me like a step parent, nor does their father. Unfortunally if the step parent is not allowed to discipline then the kids don't respect and usually use it against the parent....Then things don't work. Good luck
2007-03-22 07:16:29 · answer #5 · answered by Melba 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know. And I've had a stepmother since age 5, and a stepfather since 11. Neither one of them ever disciplined me or my brother; it was always done by the real parent.
Conversely, my cousin moved into our house to escape his stepfather, who started applying country justice for minor infractions within a few months of moving into their house.
It seems that there should be a point where it's a good idea, otherwise it's still really a one-parent household with an extra adult floating around. It's not fair to the child, who has a longer tenure in the family, to have discipline immediately applied by a stepparent. But there should be a point where it's appropriate.
2007-03-20 11:27:30 · answer #6 · answered by Doc Occam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i went thru this when my hubby and i got togehter! i already had 3 kids and it was very hard for me to think of someone else disciplining them! but after a couple of months he started little by little with verbal punishment. we have been together almost 4 years now and he has only spanked my 2 oldest 13 & 11 just recently. my son who is 7 now was young when we got together so it was like 6 months after we were together when he started discipling him. i am the one who came to the conclusion that if he was going to be in our lives forever than he had a right to discipline as well! the older kids are when a step parent comes into the picture the harder this would be to make a decision on discipline!! my kids actually respect him more than if he just stood by and did nothing!
2007-03-20 11:27:25 · answer #7 · answered by onecrazymama05 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This should be discussed with the parent of the child,
However I would say if the behaviour was unacceptable then I would have to speak to the child. I hesitate to use the word discipline as each person has a view on what constitutes discipline.
2007-03-20 11:21:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the situation. I think the natural parent should be told what the child is doing and they should both sit down and talk to the child(ren). At one point in their life the stepparent will have to discipline them and they should respect it. Discipline starts in the household whether we are the natural parent or not. We are the "parent".
2007-03-20 11:21:33 · answer #9 · answered by Feline05 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well you have to be on the same page-- if you tell the step parent to never discipline the child and you aren't around when it needs to be done, the child gets away with it.
Ultimately the step parent needs to respect your boundaires, but you need to work together or it wont work.
2007-03-20 11:20:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋