I friend of mine from high school is getting married this summer. It's been 10 years and we are not really close at all anymore. She is having a bridal shower this weekend. Do I have to get her two separate presents for the shower and the wedding, or is one enough for the whole occasion? Mind you she is registered at some pretty high end store that I just really can't afford too much at. Thanks to all!
2007-03-20 04:24:11 · 16 answers · asked by redpeach_mi 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You need to send her 2 gifts, and each gift should cost $25 for each year you haven't seen her, and should contain 4 ounces of gold for each ex-boyfriend you have in common, and should be hand delivered by Chippendale dancers, and actually you should send a separate gift for each member of your family who WON'T be attending the wedding or the shower, and each gift should cost 4 months' salary of your highest paid relative.
2007-03-20 04:35:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
The only etiquette there is about gift giving is this:
ANY gift should be given from the heart. It should not make the giver struggle, nor should it be inappropriately extravagant. The gift you give should reflect your relation to this person as well as your feeling for them.
What this means is that you should only give what your pocketbook can easily afford (if this is $20 or $200 that it what it is).
Generally a gift is given for each, but the shower is only the closest of friends...
If its been 10 yrs and you are not that close to her anymore I would wonder why you were invited, it could be she really wanted to renew your friendship or it could be a gift grab, only you know her well enough to answer this.
Some people use the shower as their opportunity to give their wedding present, so that they need not mail another to the couple.
There is no etiquette that dictates which way to go with this... I would say though that as you are not close to the bride any longer you would do better to give your wedding gift at the shower and call it good enough, especially if youre on a budget.
2007-03-20 04:47:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that if you aren't close then you can skip one of these events, preferrably the shower in my opinion. If you can't afford a gift for both but still want to attend both functions then get the gift for the shower since she is sure to notice if you don't bring one there and just give her a nice card for the wedding.
2007-03-20 04:44:11 · answer #3 · answered by kauai_lvr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually the bridal shower gift is something more for the bride herself. And the wedding gift is for both of them. I think you do need to take them a gift for each, but you dont have to do get her something from her registry for the shower, just for the wedding.
2007-03-23 12:26:55 · answer #4 · answered by MariChelita 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be appropriate to give a gift at both functions, if you plan to attend both. Even if she's registered at some high end stores, you can easily use her registry as a source of ideas for what she would like, then shop for your gifts at a store that you can afford. That way, you get her something she would truly like, and something that's easier on your budget. In general, registries are a great source of ideas for receiving not only gifts that you need, but makes things easier on the giver, by displaying what kinds of items you would be interested in.
2007-03-20 04:46:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you even invited to the shower if you aren't really good friends? I would say give her something on the lower end of her registry for the shower, then another lower priced item fro the wedding. If you accept invites to both events, you do need to give a gift at each event.
2007-03-20 04:37:20 · answer #6 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are attending both, you give a gift for both. With the shower gift at least cover how much your lunch might cost and then try to double that cost. For the wedding, if you are attending with a date you need to AT LEAST cover the cost of the plate at dinner which people must realize has gone up in recent years. Dinner plates now average around $35-$40 per plate and if you are bringing a date that is double. Call the reception site and ask what the average price for plate is, times 2 if bringing a date and then at least give that much.
2007-03-20 04:45:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, etiquette says buy a gift for both. But, this does not mean you have to go broke, especially for a casual acquaintance. People often register for large things they want to be able to pick out themselves. You could simply get them a gift card to the store where they are registered for the wedding and some cute kitchen thing for the shower.
You could split the cost of a larger gift with some of your friends that might also go to the wedding.
2007-03-20 04:39:40 · answer #8 · answered by soelo 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get her a shower gift and then take a card to the wedding, maybe with a gift card in it if you're feeling generous.
I know exactly what you mean.... all of my friends are getting married and between bachelorette parties, wedding showers, wedding gifts, I'm going broke!
2007-03-20 04:33:37 · answer #9 · answered by jframeisu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're invited to both, and attend both, a gift is in order for each. I would buy her a gift for the shower, go with what you can afford but the shower is all about the gifts; a card with $ for the wedding is the best way to go.
2007-03-20 04:30:32 · answer #10 · answered by Just tryin' to help 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes a separate gift for both. You don't have to give her a gift off her registry though. If you can't afford much, why not something simple like kitchen towels and pot holders, bookends, gardening tools if they are buying a home. There are lots of inexpensive things you could give. If you're just old friends she'll be happy that you want to share her day with her. Good luck
2007-03-20 04:33:09 · answer #11 · answered by J M 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋