I'm always getting approached by men that I am not at all interested in, and the ones I AM interested in treat me like dirt usually. Sometimes I try to at least get to know the guy that I don't like, and I might give him my number, but then he always wants to be with me, and I end up never liking him. How do you let someone down gently?
2007-03-06 07:10:37 · 15 answers · asked by beachgirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
there is no gentle way,someone is going to hurt
2007-03-06 07:13:38 · answer #1 · answered by madtyga2002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like me!!! Before I was in my current relationship I did the same thing. It's called being too nice. I always gave my number and just never answered the phone. I know that's not the right thing to do, but that was how I got myself out of my sticky situations. The truth is you don't have to say you're just not interested bluntly. Say your seeing someone, or your too busy to start a relationship. There a lot of things to make up if you're not a straight forward person and don't want to hurt someones feeling. Good Luck!
2007-03-06 07:22:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. If you're not interested and they are, you're going to hurt their feelings. Oh, and the reason why the guys you like keep treating you like dirt is because you have commitment anxiety. Meaning, it doesn't just "keep happening." You are purposefully seeking out (maybe subconciously) "bad" boys, usually because your standards are based on physical attraction first, and everything else second. Here's a nickel worth of free advice. Why not ask someone you like questions like "Where did you do your undergrad?" or "Who's your favorite artist?"..meaning art....this might give you an idea if he's a piece of meat or if he actually uses the grey matter between his ears.
2007-03-06 07:19:06 · answer #3 · answered by J-Dizzle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been where you are...the truth is there is no "easy" way to let someone down. Their egos, if not their feelings, will be hurt regardless. The best thing to do is be completely honest without being overly harsh. Don't say things that you know aren't true like "I wish things could be different", "I'm not looking for a relationship right now"...people know when they are being bullshitted so honesty - even though it will hurt - is the best policy. Just say you aren't interested and move on.
2007-03-06 07:16:01 · answer #4 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL u know I had this same problem. I had a class with this guy and I could tell he liked me but I was no way interrested in him, just something about him freaked me out! UGH anyway, everyday or at least every week, 2x a week is when we had the class, he would ask me questions like, so can I get to know you or make really really inept comments that kind of let me know homeboy was desperate for a girl and I don't get involved with dudes like that. He would make commnets like oh it's because I'm dark skinned (I'm black, so that's where that comes in, we have that issue in our race, just for clarification, if ur not Black) Neway I'm dark skinned as well and I told him no that that isn't the reason, my point is is that dude had issues and finally after telling him that I wasn't interested in a relationship I got pisst cuz he kept coming at me and finally i let him have it and told him that I didn't find him attractive ( not in the sense of physical attritbutes) but just his ways were freaky to me, and that I felt he was too desperate and that I don't involve myself with men like that, he looked at me like I was crazy LOL and of course went on the DEF MODE,. Neway sometimes u have to tell them straight, after you've said it in a nice way, and I did on multiple occasions, a whole lot, u get tired after a while. Neway, good luck and keep it real girl! Yeah I used to do the same thing as the other answer above me . yep I would and actually still do if I'm in a really weird situation, like at work, and men ask me for my number try and give me theirs I say I'm in a relationship or something or either I'll say give me ur number and I'll just throw it away! I know I know that's mean ,but that's better than hurting them!
2007-03-06 07:25:03 · answer #5 · answered by LU S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you really cant let them down gently b/c no matter what you are goin to hurt their feelings.. it just goes that way.. i just say tell them straight up how you feel say hey dude sorry but i dont like you like that at all but i do like you as a friend and ONLY a friend!
2007-03-06 07:14:48 · answer #6 · answered by Breanna W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well its like this there is no way to not hurt someone beginnings are scary endings are sad but its whats in the middle that counts hope that helps ya some
2007-03-06 07:19:26 · answer #7 · answered by poohbear27 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You need to let that person know that you would like to get to know him better before you date him. That is probably the safest way to stay out of situations like this. Hope this helped.
2007-03-06 07:17:15 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it her outfits? Like i hadd a pal who lived ina traolor park and he or she STUNK and her hair replaced into greasy and that i by no potential informed her. yet you clould like take her swimming and then like provide her a physique shampoo or in simple terms say "You my chum, and Im going to tell you the actuality, and additionally you're able to desire to do an analogous for me. You kinda scent undesirable. you're able to desire to like have a tub each and every morning or somthing, i dont ean to be propose yet i presumed according to danger you woulld choose to be attentive to. yet i nonetheless lovee you!! :D"
2016-10-17 10:16:07 · answer #9 · answered by olis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. Simply tell them that you are not interested in them as more than a friend.
2007-03-06 07:14:26 · answer #10 · answered by lunasage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋