without giving in and feeling cheap? (I don't mean on a date, just with a friend or family member).
2007-01-11 12:38:09 · 20 answers · asked by wendygirl1000 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
You should say ahead of time that it is on you. If you think that the other person would insist, tell the restaurant staff ahead of time to bring the check to you only.
2007-01-11 12:42:22 · answer #1 · answered by SS90 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Look them in the eyes. Tell them that you appreciate the offer but you insist on paying.
If they refuse wad up the cash and throw it into their face with as much force as possible. Then pick up a martini from another table and down it in one gulp and storm out of the restaurant.
When you arrive home be sure to write a pleasant note thanking them for their company in your own hand writing and suggest that you would like to enjoy their company again in the near future.
2007-01-11 14:18:02 · answer #2 · answered by tk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my husband ask me out the first time, we discussed it. I HATE TO FEEL OBLIGATED TO A MAN BECAUSE HE FED ME. I told him he could pay this time but I will pay next time. I was working, he couldn't understand because he was raised to feel women should not have to pay for dinner or anything else on a date. Which I feel is true. BUT men these days use this as an excuse to get in your pants if they can.
On the other hand...if it just friends, agree to let them pay this time graciously, with the explicit understanding that YOU pay next time.
2007-01-11 13:02:35 · answer #3 · answered by Karen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you should just let them pay would be the polite thing to do. You're not being cheap if the people offer it even after you have let them know you want it to be your treat.
2007-01-11 19:48:59 · answer #4 · answered by macho007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's an ongoing thing, offer to swap off who's turn it is to pay. Otherwise, look them square in the eye and say. "Seriously, I want to pay for your meal." If they continue to refuse accept it. (I usually offer three times and and after that I let them have their way. I even go so far sometimes as to say 'This is the last time I'm going to offer, let me pay for your dinner.')
If they can afford it and they won't let you pay after you've offered, don't think any more about it. If you still feel like a bit of a heel, take them to a movie and pay for their ticker (step ahead of them in line and loudly announce 'Two please' if you have to)
2007-01-11 23:04:35 · answer #5 · answered by LX V 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the other party insists on paying for himself you have met any social obligation you have and you have shown your generosity even if it hasn't been accepted. There is no need to feel cheap. In fact, you may be making the other party feel that way, unknowingly. Be gracious, let it slide.
2007-01-11 19:28:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You grab the check from the waitress before they do, or if you want to be extra sneaky, give the restaurant your credit card ahead of time, they'll bring you the bill and your card to sign when YOU ask for the check.
2007-01-11 12:43:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they absolutely insist, let them. And then give them a gift certificate for the same amount to the restaurant.
2007-01-12 08:25:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
graciously back down while maintaining the same smile on your face :)
Believe me I know some people who cannot acept any small favours.
Its their nature and you need to respect that, in order to avoid embarassing them.
They really don't want to look cheap way more than you don't.
Good luck!
2007-01-11 12:45:59 · answer #9 · answered by venom! 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If they go to use the facilites I would get the bill and pay for it, or when I leave the table I would pay the waiter then.
2007-01-11 12:41:49 · answer #10 · answered by flightpillow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋