Everytime I get into a relationship I am too scared to lead the relationship anywhere because I am afraid it will end up leading to sex. I am 23 yrs old ....never had sex before ....and truthfully am scared to death of it to the point I can't even have a relationship without thinking it is leading straight toward that and I can't imagine doing that with the person so I break it off early. Is this normaL? How do I get over this?
2006-12-08 14:13:14 · 9 answers · asked by Lyndsay E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's good that you understand this is a problem. That doesn't mean you need to have sex before you're married, but you need to find out why you're afraid of it because you'll miss out on a very pleasurable and emotionally fulfilling part of your life if you don't. You'll have to do a sort of inventory to find out where this came from. What kind of upbringing did you have? What did each person in your life add to your perception of intimacy and sex? What kind of relationship did your parents have? Were you or anyone you know abused? Do you know anyone who suffered from or died as a result of childbirth? What kind of school did you go to and what were the attitudes? What kind of religious upbringing and what did that teach you? You get the idea; leave no stone unturned. Try keeping a journal and devote yourself to writing at least on this topic each day. Don't just think about it, write down what all the experiences of your life added to your perception of sex.
No it isn't normal, and you might eventually want to seek outside help. You might anyway if you find out the reason on your own. Eventually you should find where the fear is coming from and you can put those pieces of your past into perspective. You might find anything from friction in your parents' marriage to the need to change ideas taught to you about Divine retribution when you were a child. If you think deeply on this, pay attention to your dreams. The mind doesn't stop working when you fall asleep.
But you've decided to face this and reclaim a part of your life. Good luck.
2006-12-08 14:55:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sex is a beautiful and precious thing ( not kidding). You shouldnt be afraid of sex. There are alot of guys out there that would like to have a sex-free relationship (if that is also what you are looking for). Date around. Just because you went on a date of 3 with a guy doesnt mean that you 2 are (will become) an item and thus, the relationship will lead to sex.
2006-12-08 14:37:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is because you feel that person is not deserving and respectful. If you felt comfortable with the person you would not end it. I am not a virgin but I date, and if I feel the guy is interested in sex so soon I end it quick. That is a warning for me what he is really after. There is nothing wrong and don't get over it. I have a lot of respect for you.
2006-12-08 14:22:36 · answer #3 · answered by Sassy Shut Your Mouth 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you so terrified of sex? Granted, I'm trying to wait for marriage. But you sound afraid of it. Sex is supposed to be very pleasant, so fearing it is not normal. Maybe you should seek counseling. Good luck!
2006-12-08 14:29:16 · answer #4 · answered by anonymous 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you never try to get into a relationship, how would you know it will lead to sex?
But Frankly... I think it would...
Get involve with a Christan then...
2006-12-08 14:17:47 · answer #5 · answered by BB2791 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're going to need a vibrator and two double a batteries. Once you get addicted to that thing, you'll quickly be over your fear of sex.
2006-12-08 14:16:51 · answer #6 · answered by PS 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
youre just not ready....which is good, but thats not all guys want atleast not the ones ive met in the past. have you ever dated a virgin?
2006-12-08 14:17:23 · answer #7 · answered by tasha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GURL I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HELP U REALLY CUZ I'AM 17 AND I'AM STILL HAVEN'T HAD SEX SO I DON'T KNOW
2006-12-08 14:18:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont do it !!!
2006-12-08 14:19:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋