why am i always angry at my wife ,i don`t want to be.?

Question

we have extremely stressful lives, a sick child and a struggling business,but it`s still not fair that i blame her

Answer 1

Your right you shouldn't & now that you know that work from there. She is probably feeling the same way & you guys need to be strong cause that is alot to have on you both in a marriage. Trust me I'm in the same boat but without a sick child. Pray hard & keep God 1st & it will all work out from there.

Answer 2

You should not blame anyone. Her or yourself. Life is like a roller coaster ride, you know. We go up to some exciting highs, and we come down to some pretty low spots, but mostly we ride along the rim. Right now, you are experiencing a really low spot and you can't see your way out. Many marriages break up at your point. The best ones stay together because they refuse to blame anyone. They work together to get back up again. Sometimes help is needed. Counseling would really help you both. If you don't want to pay a typical family counselor, ask at your church for help. And don't forget to ask God to be with you as you struggle.

Answer 3

First off, for whatever reasons, you always hurt the ones you love the most. Screwed up, I know.

It could be possible you are dealing with depression or anxiety issues. That doesn't mean you are a failure. Check out the symptoms to depression and anxiety and see if you fit the bill.

I'm self employed, with three children (healthy but naughty) and constantly have a mean edge to me - and I can recognized that. I've been on antidepressents for 7 months and it's made a difference of night and day.

My marriage is fantastic, I can tolerate the kids much better, and business is back on track.

GOOD LUCK!

Answer 4

It carries over from other stuff. Quit being angry about all of it and just deal with a little at any moment. Just try to be happy and over look as much as possible that you do not like. You just have to learn to get over being mad and get on with feeling good. This is a state of mind. That is not the right way to do that darlin, lets..... Make things sem easier and nicer and they will get to seem that way. Quit worring and take these things as a test in dealing with them. Do not get upset and just do what you need. I could be a little more sucesful but choose not to. A few more hours at work and could have a new truck. But no new truck but 2 older ones with no payment and more time at home with the wifey and family. Less stress.

Answer 5

A lot of men cannot take the strain and when under stress tend to take out their feelings on their nearest and dearest, their wives. If you see yourself doing this, think again and make an effort to apologise. It is a terrible thing as a wife who is supportive of her husband to be yelled at and picked on, to take the rebuffs for her hubands own insecurities. Seek help from other men who are accountable not from beer drinking buddies. It helps a lot to get things off ones back. Your wife is a treasure given to you to hold and to love and to treat like you would your best friend. She married you because she loves you. Now go back and love her back and remember what drew you to her in the first place. Help her to keep her identity and not to lose it. It happens so easily. Dont try changing her either, because you loved what you got in the first place. Encourage her and nurture her. The bible says that when a man finds a wife, he finds a good thing! Always bear that in mind.

Thank you for being bold enough to ask. It takes a real man to do that. May you always think before you speak and may you be married to the love of your life for ever on earth. God Bless you both.

Answer 6

Because she is available and the only one there to lash out at. I am very sorry that you are having a rough time. You need to go through this together and count on eachother to be there. Maybe counseling is the key if you have the time and energy. Your wife is going through the exact same thing you are. Nobody is at fault. Be there for her. Take some time out, just a night, and get reacquainted with her. Go on a date. Forget your troubles for a couple of hours. I wish you the best of luck and also for your child and business. Take care.

Answer 7

Perhaps because she is the person closest to you at the moment. We tend to take out our frustrations on our loved ones because they are there. You wouldn't dream of lashing out at your best friend, but have no problem taking out your frustrations on your wife. She's close to the situation, she knows what's going on, and she knows >you<. Unfortuntately, she's become the brunt of your frustrations. It's not fair, no. You need to learn to communicate with her, sit down calmly and let her know how you're feeling. Make arrangements at the end of the day to sit down and discuss the day, your feelings, your thoughts, your concerns. Let her help you work through the issues, rather than pushing her away by putting the blame on her. Let her help you find ways to improve the success of your business, she may be smarter than you think. Your wife married you because she wanted to be your partner in life, not your metaphorical punching bag. Spend time together, get reacquainted, remember all the reasons you agreed to get married, to >her<, and find a way learn to cope with the stress.

Answer 8

I do that to my husband. I find that I pick a fight with him when I've had a bad day at work. I know the right thing to do is just NOT DO it, but it's hard. Maybe you should just stop blaming and try to accept that there is things in life we cannot change and it's no one's fault. Try talking to her about your concerns. Tell her if you want her to just listen or if you want her thoughts too before you start talking. Maybe if you tell her all the reasons you are stressed and talk about them with her it will be easier to see her as a compassionate figure in you day rather than a emotional punching bag.

Answer 9

For all the things that can and do go wrong we always find fault with our wifes. Why I think that is a easy target. In the back of your mind you see her always forgiving you as you do for her. the best thing is that you see the problem and possible get a couple of counselings to help better understand what and how to fix the problem.

Answer 10

Don't blame her anymore. If you know you shouldn't then don't..Go see a counselor. It sounds like you need to get some stuff off your chest. Maybe you guys need to find a babysitter and have a night out with just yourselves..It doesn't have to be an expensive date. Just go out and try to have fun once a month or so.. Good Luck and I hope everything works out.