He lies about everything, the smallest things mostly.. i know he would never do anything to really hurt me but i need to get through to him and have him understand he can talk to me..what to do??
2006-12-02 13:47:27 · 22 answers · asked by Jen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sometimes treachery and deceit seem to be the only way to deal with things we cannot face. Facing the alternative is more condemning than the lie one makes to avoid the alternative.
2006-12-02 13:51:29 · answer #1 · answered by Drowningbluestars 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he lies about everything and you still like the guy? some people, not just men, feel compelled to lie, especially about the smallest things b/c they have low self-esteem and don't think much of themselves. they believe people feel the same way about them, so they tend to lie to make things seem bigger and better than they are to cover up their insecurities. some people are just pathalogical liars. they can't help themselves. again, it's mental. some people think the truth is boring, and opt for something more colorful and exciting. mental! some people lie so as not to hurt someone else's feelings. insecure wusses! sometimes it's best not to say anything at all. but lying will eventually catch up to you.
at any rate, dump the guy. if he lies about everything, especially the small stuff, he has issues. i'd be scared, well, wary anyway! what's the point of dating someone who can't tell the truth? you want to live a lie?
you can't change people. you shouldn't even ask him to change or get help. you should only date/marry people whose characters you already like and can deal with w/o having to actually deal with, you know? relationships are hard as it is, why make it that much harder by dating a liar? it's not your place to change or better the guy. that's his sole responsibility, and that of his parents (growing up).
it shouldn't matter to you why he lies, or that he lies. you should leave the guy, and don't look back. it's not worth the trouble. you can always find yourself a good guy you can trust. takes the grief out of dating. makes life worth living. good luck.
2006-12-02 21:58:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lying about little things is usually a defence mechanism for everyone, I would say he has either been hurt really badly in the past, by either family or girl, He does not trust you yet..
You have two options here. Wait, be patient, know that he lies and try to determine when and about what. OR, cut clean, do not hurt him anymore, he will right himself, but the path he needs to take is long and painful for both him and partner. if you are not prepared for the long hawl, pull out, stay mates, but make it very very clear, nothing more...
2006-12-02 21:51:27 · answer #3 · answered by hotdigger1980 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is hurting you. Lies hurt and make a relationship dishonest. The fact that you are not going to be able to trust him is hurting the relationship and you as well. The lies start small then increase.
It is not your job to fix him. Walk away if he does not straighten up but most of the time we women don't. "We love them" so we say and then we stay and make a project of the ordeal to fix our men. We waste many years, our emotions, our time, our self-esteem and our finance before we realize this is not our problem but theres.
liars are untrustworthy and these words don't belong in your relationship.
Best of luck.
2006-12-02 21:54:28 · answer #4 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do you expect to have a strong relationship with him if your relationship base with trust isn't even completed??? If you cant trust him then you can forget about having a good relationship with him. If he isn't trusting then what kind of relationship is that?? You NEED TRUST!!!! Why would he lie about the small things anyway? Maybe it could be fixed through couple counseling but if I was you then I would break up with him really fast .
2006-12-02 21:51:14 · answer #5 · answered by KewlieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same logic as once a cheat always a cheat. Once a liar always a liar. I have dated 2 liars and they started small and then got bigger and bigger and what was meant to be a small white lie ended up making the relationship one big lie. So safe urself the challenge of helping him (we women think we can fix everything) and dump him.
2006-12-02 21:52:42 · answer #6 · answered by Miss J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you know he's lying and make him feel that he doesn't need to lie and you like him as himself. Talk to him in person and don't hurt his feelings. If thing don't work out break up because the relationship isn't worth it.
2006-12-02 21:51:10 · answer #7 · answered by fruit salad 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he lies about small things, just wait around he'll lie about something big before it's over. Constant liars are hard to trust ....because you never know when they are lying!
2006-12-02 22:00:27 · answer #8 · answered by CLAIRE KC1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he lies to you about the little stuff then how do you know he won't hurt you? Find someone who will be honest with you because you may end up regretting it later.
2006-12-02 21:50:39 · answer #9 · answered by amber 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my ex husband was that way from the get go and i made the same excuse, he did end up hurting me by cheating, don't fool yourself,,RUN as FAR as you can. if he lies about thing he doesnt need to he is sure to lie about the ones he does need to.
2006-12-02 22:00:48 · answer #10 · answered by openminded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋