Because a woman just got out of a long term relationship and didn't want an exclusive relationship, a man and a woman start talking about having a friends w/benefits relationship.
She says she isn't sure but finally says she really wants to be with him but is is nervous because she hasn't been w/anyone other than her ex for a long time. She asks him to be patient with her and go slow. He says okay.
They were talking about seeing each other that night but when she asks he then says "no it wouldn't be a good idea". She asks what he thought she meant when she asked him to go slow and be patient. He said he thought she meant continuing slowly as friends before having sex.
2006-12-02 08:24:36 · 7 answers · asked by j t 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sometimes people don't actually want what they are pursueing. What they get off on is the chase and when they finally get it it actually holds no interest for them anymore.
2006-12-02 08:27:37 · answer #1 · answered by jjmlls 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He clearly isn't interested in a reltionship and she is. No guy wants a woman they can control. SInce he thought she wanted to be friends first, he lost interest because he is afraid of being emotionally intimate with anyone and just wants sex. He was interested at first because she indicated that she just wanted sex without the relationship.
She is a fool to think that by putting out, she can make a man want a relationship. He will lose interest in her after the sex. She wil feel used and resentful.
Sex is different for women. Women are more fulfilled by the sex when there in emotional intimacy involved. Sometimes they want no involvement, but the sex loses it's luster quickly when it is meaningless.
Most men who avoid emotional intimacy fear the vulnerable feeling of being involved that way. it causes them to get insecure and feel inadequate. Men see feelings as a weakness.
Not all guys are like that. But that's why it is a better idea to not out out for a guy unless it's going somewhere. Build a relationship first, one that can stand on it's own without the sex.
If a guy is truly interested in you, he will patiently wait. Guys like a challenge, and you will be a man-magnet if you challenge him.
Best advice is to cut him loose and find another guy. This one clearly is only interested in using sex with you to validate his ego. He is not interested in getting to know you or being a partner in a relationship.
2006-12-02 16:37:57 · answer #2 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a man thinks a woman has "issues" they usually pull away. Sounds like this was the case. If you agree to be a friend with benefits, you can't issues or restrictions, and you have to be able to walk away. That's what it's all about. Stay friends, but when the need to "get your grove on" is there, you have someone reliable and comfortable with to call.
2006-12-02 16:30:15 · answer #3 · answered by deanie1962 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He either found someone else to be with,Or he knows that he can't have a sex only friendship with her for fear he will get his heart broken,or break hers and likes\loves her\himself to much to go through that.
2006-12-02 16:30:17 · answer #4 · answered by master_der_man 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
thought it would be a long drawn out friendship before benifits.
2006-12-02 16:27:42 · answer #5 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have no idea. That's a little confusing.
2006-12-02 16:26:41 · answer #6 · answered by brown eyed gurl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is there a question in this slop?
2006-12-02 16:26:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋