My parents have been pressurising me into marriage (i have been born & brought up in england), and they brought home some friend of a friends son, who is an indian national. I have always been dead against this sort of thing as I will never be able to trust someone like that - how do you know if they truly want to be with you, or if they just want a reason to stay in the uk? (yes, i have 'trust' issues)
however after i met this guy a few times, i actually think i like him!
So any advice would be appreciated - shall i stick to my original thoughts and avoid him at all costs before my feelings begin to develop further? has anyone been/or is in a similar situation??
2006-11-26 08:49:58 · 13 answers · asked by choca-locka-baby 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Perhaps i have given the misleading title of "arranged marriage" - my family will not be getting/losing anything out of this, they just want to see me settled and happy.
2006-11-26 08:57:18 · update #1
Not every time will you meet a bad guy in an arranged arrangement. If you kinda like the guy you can get to know him more and see how it goes. On the other hand if you think he could be in it for the visa etc.. then he might be putting up a very nice face for you and until you get married... I think you should find out each and everything about him... meet his friends... and see what kind of a person he is... Obviously if you think there is something dodgy you can always ask him to get lost.... but if he is the one for you .. then it might be worth giving it a try.. :-)
2006-11-26 08:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by Cerebraltissue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To you he looks like a chimpanzee??? Have you ever seen a chimp?? You are f'king crazy or who ever arrange your marriage is evil. My guess is that it is you. I doubt very much he looks anything like a chimp. I imagine your mental problems have more to do with your fears than his looks. First of all. ALL people have about the SAME number of hair folicles per square inch of skin. The genetic differences are mostly due to how large the hair is in diameter and how long it grows before it falls out. You have as many hairs on your face ...or chest...or back..or butt as he does. Chances are yours are much finer and much shorter. So, he is hirsuite. And your reaction is that his hair is ugly. Well, that is just stupid. I know, it is what it is, but it is just a totally irrational response to human variability. There are a couple of things you could do: Get some counseling. Your marriage is in trouble. Ask him to wax or shave. You could help. Touch him. I'll bet his hair feels good. If you're willing to give him a chance. But it sounds that for some reason (and I doubt it is the hair) that you have decided not to actually commit to the marriage. Nothing we can do about that. Either try to fix it, or end it.
2016-05-23 05:25:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you should stick with your original thoughts, because he could sound all goodie now but in the end it might not turn up as you would of wanted it to. Dont try to make your parents fell better but going off and just get married, wait awhile leave the door open for Mr.Right to come along.
2006-11-26 08:54:32 · answer #3 · answered by lil_mama69smokie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think that you like him, then why hold back??
I've had problems with trust in the past as well. You'll never learn to trust someone if you are always holding back. Put yourself out there and see what happens...
You never know... he could be the man of your dreams!
2006-11-26 08:52:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that you should get to know him more, spend more time with him, and take your time too. I think as a women, you'll know after a while if he want to just be in the UK or be with you. If you like him thats good, but to play it safe, just hang out with him, know him and let him know you. Hope it all works out!
2006-11-26 08:53:50 · answer #5 · answered by Princess P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Arranged marriages seem to work better than love matches. Give it some time and see if he seems genuine. It could work out.
2006-11-26 08:52:29 · answer #6 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is compulsary for you to have an arranged marriage,
fair enough.
But don't let anyone pressurise you into it. after all, you are the one who is going to spend your life with this person. Not anyone else.
2006-11-26 08:56:53 · answer #7 · answered by The LIZARD of OG 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Weather you meet someone by chance or design is irrelevant get to know him don't rush or be pressured into doing something that your not comfortable with. Remember this is your life and happiness not your parents.
2006-11-26 08:59:13 · answer #8 · answered by Joel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you like thim thats awesome
i heard a statisic about how arranged marriages last and marrying for love ends in divorce a lot more
2006-11-26 08:53:30 · answer #9 · answered by rightwing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should let your feelings go, if you can learn to trust him and love him even better...make sure you put the whole marriage thing of for quite a while to be sure of his feelings.
2006-11-26 08:53:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋