i need comebacks?

Question

some kids in school are calling me fat and its time to get back at them. a lot of people on here are like, "why don't you be the better man and walk away?" : because im not a *ussy, also people are like "just ignore them" : it dont work when you're in a class room, then you got the "tell them to shut up" ones : heres an idea for people who say that...dont answer this.

they're saying stuff like oink oink and you were the best pig the petting zoo ever had. so give me some comebacks or something, because im halfway from going up to these *ags and punchin their *uckin lights out.

Now these kids are putting crap about me being fat in their infos on AIM and I don't know what to do!!! I can't get their screen name deleted and I don't know how to get them kicked off aim or reported or anything. ANY HELP!?!

Answer 1

the problem is that their insults are weak and not clever at all. i mean oink oink? that is pathetic. to shut them up just come up with an insult that mocks their insults it doesn't have to be reality based at all. or try the rope a dope.... like you know that's all you can come up with? their insults are retarded that's the weakness

for ex.

oink oink? that's all you can come up with? what a pathetic douchebag
your mother's hoecakes are greasy from having sex with the goats

they are just doing it to get a rise out of you it's a primate ritual. they got nothing. they are such losers they waste time picking on people. it's pathetic.

Answer 2

"You know i would slap you but i dont wanna make your face look any better"
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Why don't you slip into something more comfortable...like a coma.
I never forget a face...but in your case I'll make an exception!
100,000 sperm to choose from, and you were the fastest.
You were one of the first to get a brain, before they were perfected.
When they were handing out brains you arrived too late, all you got was a rain check.
When they were giving out looks, you thought they said books, and you said "Give me something funny"
You don't have to say anything. Your face offends me just by being in the area.(give a snide look, looking her up and down w/disgust)
I'm not offended by what you say. I'm just glad that you're stringing words into sentences now.
I wouldn't get angry at you today. It's "Be kind to Animals" week.
It's not what you say, it's the thought behind it that counts, and I know there's never any thought behind anything you say.
Nothing you could say could offend me. I only get offended by things that make sense.
I just have one question, Do you still love nature, despite what it did to you?
You know, All day I thought of you... I was at the zoo.
•Are you always an idiot, or just when I'm around?
you know, Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.
•Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?
•I hear that when you were a child, your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you, but the Mafia wanted too much.
•They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.
•You must be from the shallow end of the gene pool




Here you go mate hope these help

Answer 3

This sounds like you are being bullied at school. Have you spoken to your teachers or guidance counselors? This should not be tolerated. Have you told your parents?

As for comebacks? I am not sure what to tell you. I don't want to see you get into trouble with these bozos. You're a smart kid- too smart to let some jerks bully you into fights.

I think your counselors and teachers can help you with some of these problems.

This is probably what you don't want to read.

I was bullied in grade school, too (in the 60s). I really needed help with my self esteem. I was called names because I had braces and "cat eye" glasses. I looked like a nerd. So, I certainly empathize with you.

Here are a few "politically correct" comebacks:

"I don't have to put others down in order to make myself feel better."

"So, you've been to the petting zoo lately? Was your date a goat?"

You get the idea. I hope you can get the support you need.

Answer 4

She She got my answer - used to see it on a bumper sticker! "I may be fat, but you're ugly - and I can diet".

On the bright side, if you're big enough, why not punch some lights out? Wouldn't do it in school, wait for them off the school grounds so you don't get suspended. It worked for me as a teenager. That and using my 'somewhat' superior common sense...I'd wait till they did something stupid and snap a picture. It got a lot of respect, even if I never used them. Another thing, my maman had me taught some 'self defense' - a little this and that, karate, kickboxing, you know. It helps with the fat, and it sure hurts them if you kick the right spot.

Good luck! Fat isn't the worst thing, stupid is, and they are.

Answer 5

Trying to talk to them like they have feelings is never going to work. I was that skinny, zit faced kid, with the stick body & big boobs. I was tortured by all of the sports kids, cheerleaders & some of the teachers. The names they called me were unimaginable and really uncreative.
My bestfriend was a big girl & together we found some solice.
Years later we had our first high school reunion, I was surprised to see how much they had changed, the ones who made fun of me and my friend, were fat, unmarried and had several children.
Life has a way of paying back to those who tread upon us.
Hope this helps.

Answer 6

No honey do not punch anyone out. They are immature and insensitive. Years from now you will realize it is not you with the problem but it's them. You have nothing to defend nor make excuses for...ignoring them is good because kids usually pick on other kids they can get a rise out of...if you find inner confidence about yourself they can say whatever they want to say, you know much better inside yourself. Confidence goes a long way to changing others opinions. When these kids realize that they are just wasting their breath by taunting you, they will move on to someone else...Good luck!

Answer 7

Dude. Relax.

I was fat in high school, and I dealt with the same stuff you are going through now. I promise you, I PROMISE you that if you react in the way you're suggesting, you're going to make it worse. They're just going to come down on you harder. Now, I'm not telling you to be a puss*, I'm telling you to think this through logically.

Plus, and I know this isn't what you want to hear, but when you're out of school, none of this crap is going to matter. It's hard to believe now, I know, but what goes on socially in high school has absolutely zero effect on your life later on...unless you allow it to.

Take it from someone who has been there.

Answer 8

You could say stuff like "If it makes you feel better about yourself to talk shi* about me, then go ahead, I'd need something to boost my self-esteem if I were as f'ing stupid as you too." Or maybe, "Yeah, I'm fat, but at least my girlfriend didn't sleep with ____(fill in the blank with someone they may feel threatened by)....or didn't you know?" F*ck with their heads as much as possible. Or "If you need to talk shi* about me to feel better about your penis being extremely small then go ahead". If people were saying those kind of things about me, I'd probably find a car that no one would recognize, find their cars in the middle of the night, and spray paint all over them, or throw rotten food all over it. I'd be pissed. Can you find a way to mess up their grades? Go all out man! You can do it! Better yet if you know they one of them is at a party, and is drinking, and then driving home, call the police and tell them you saw a car with license plate _______ and it was out of control. Whatever you do, don't get caught.

However, I think you should also show them, and get fit, and steal their girlfriends (then dump them).

Answer 9

I'd say be the best you can be regardless of what others say. If you need comebacks, you are reducing yourself to the level they are at. It doesn't help now but those as**es do eventually grow up and become better people.

Answer 10

hey id rather be a pig then a *****

or when they say oink oink be like

aww how cute you can make animal noises now what sound does a dog make