Ive been with my fella (who is a muslim for )3 years a year ago he cheated on me and got his ex girlfriend pregnant. Iv just found out im pregnant and he wants me to get rid of my baby saying its not permitted in his relegion! But he let his ex deliver her baby. And also makes regular visits to see his ex hes told me if i decide to keep the baby his family will "disown him" and he will break up with me Im really confused and i dont understand what to do?.......
2006-09-27 06:29:37 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Read this very carefully girl! This dude isn't worth spitting on! First of all it's YOUR desision to keep your baby or not. If you let him influence you into having an abortion or giving it up for adoption, when you dont really want to, you will regret it for the rest of your life. You will never forgive yourself.
Second, who give a flying fcuk about his religon? Obviously not him, or he wouldn't have been screwing you without protection . Right?
Can you picture yourself spending the rest of your life with a guy like this?
My suggestion is to have your baby, and do it by yourself. I did it and I found a GREAT guy who loves me and my baby afterward.
Good luck girl,
Try not to get to down.
2006-09-27 06:40:40 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl I am so sorry that you have to go through this drama.
There are a few things you can do. But I feel strongly when I say leave him. LEAVE him ASAP. Now for the baby… it’s your decision. I don’t believe in abortions, but I hold nothing against people who have had them. Everyone has there reasons, and I have no right to judge.
Just keep in mind that it’s really had being a parent, especially a single parent. Would you have means to support the baby? Granted you are entitled to child support but depending upon his in come… it’s not always a reliable source of income. (But make sure you get it! You had help bringing that baby in to the world, and you most defiantly are going to need help supporting the baby) would you have friends and family to help you if the baby got sick or you needed moral support? There are a lot of things to think about… but what ever you decide… its you decision.
I wish you the best of luck and hope things turn out for the better, after all you deserve the best.
2006-09-27 06:49:03 · answer #2 · answered by girl_in707 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is right that Muslims are not suppose to have babies out of wedlock but this is not just a one way highway. You both have that decision to make about what happens to the baby. I believe that abortion is not the right way to go but this is really up to you and what you want to do. Did you ever ask him if having sex before you are married is against his religion. See he wants to have the pleasure but not the consequences of what might happen. I say get rid of him because he seems controlling and you or your baby need that. I am a young mother of two beautiful children and yes it is hard but it is all worth it when they look up at you and call you mom!! Go with your heart and not what your man is saying. You will always lose in the long run for doing something that someone else wants you to do.
2006-09-27 06:36:57 · answer #3 · answered by lala_chic2003 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but nobody can make you do something like that. He may have told you to do it but he can not force you. You have options so please don't say he made you..... If you want to keep your baby keep it. Woman raise children on their own all of the time, I'm doing it right now and my son will be 4. Men don't understand the stress and the pain along with all of the risks of aborting a child so you have to make this decision on your own... and if he loves you he'll live with what ever you decide if not you are strong enough to do it on your own.....
I'm pro choice so I'm not saying any of this because I'm against it I'm saying it because I know from experience both sides of it. I've been there and done that, take you time and decide what you really want, but remember you have to live with what you decide.
2006-09-27 06:37:20 · answer #4 · answered by :)*taurus tease*(: 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nobody can MAKE someone else do something that they don't want to do. You must realize that you can make the decision to keep your baby if you want to. For every decision we make there is at least one consequence. You know this to be true because you are now living with the consequence(s) of deciding to have unprotected sex with a man who cheats on you.
Right now your BF is telling you all about the consequences HE will suffer if you decide to keep his baby.
What about the consequence that you may suffer by giving up a child when you really aren't prepared to do that. Can you live with a decision like that?
If his ex girlfriend has a baby by him, then he will be eternally tied to her because of that child, she will remain in his life now for good because it is likely that he will want to have access to this illegitimate child.
This guy is a hypocrite, a cheater, & has threatened to dump you if you don't give in to his unreasonable demands. Do you know how to say, "Good Riddance"?
Unfortunately if you keep his child, you too will be forever tied to this man via the child, even if you end the relationship as it is now, you will have to define a new relationship with him if your child is to know it's natural father.
2006-09-27 06:51:20 · answer #5 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st it is your decision not his; if he got a girl pregnant before he should be thinking about protection, I dont think you got pregnant on purpose or alone, he was involved too. 2nd dont be afraid of leaving him, you dont need a guy like that. Imagine he is trying to blame it on you and make it your responsability, it is not your fault he would be disowned , he knew the consequences before and still took the risk. On the other hand, if you dont wanna have your baby that's your option, but if you do and you are strong enough to leave him go ahead!!!!! my mom got pregnant when she was 18 yrs and my "father" told her to get an abortion, she was going to the doctor to do it because she was afraid of him, but she realize he would leave her anyways but her son/daugther wouldnt so she had me. Im so proud of my mom and I love her more than anything in my life. So if you are ready to have a child do it becasue of you, dont think about him because he would make your life miserable anyways!!! good luck and make the best decision for U.
2006-09-27 06:43:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you do what you feel is right, religion has nothing to do with it, He is using he religion to tell you want to do. If he is man enough to have sex with you, he should be man enough to step up to the plate. He has responsibilities as much as you do. So what you both need to do is sit down and talk what needs to be done, and if you feel the need to keep the baby and he doesn't well you will not be only single parent in the world. Get help talk to your parents, pastor, whom ever you feel comfortable with. I hope everything work out for the best for you
2006-09-27 06:37:00 · answer #7 · answered by Brezzy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first off you don't need that right now you are pregnant but more so you need to make up your mind and follow your heart plus what would jesus say about you getting rid of your baby and you will live with the guilt forever. plus you don't need some guy like that anyway so just tell him bye he should of thought about all first. and whatever you do in the dark will come to the light and everyone will know how you really are. so let him know that
2006-09-27 06:36:31 · answer #8 · answered by badgirl2thefullest 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who cares if his family will disown him? If you want the baby then keep it. Simple as that. If he leaves you because of it then you are better off.
Better yet, leave him now instead of letting him make the choice. You will be better off without some loser who lives by a double standard and hides behind his religion.
2006-09-27 06:37:54 · answer #9 · answered by theoriginalquestmaker 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
obiviously he is hiding something from you- it is your body and he can't make u do anything you do not want to do-i would think about it long and hard- i was in a similar situation(mine was not muslim) but he did not want anther baby. i left him and raised my son for 2 yrs by myself until i met my fiancee -we have been ogether for 8 1/2 yrs and have a daughtet together. my son knows this his daddy.(his real father has never seen him) even though sometimes it was tough-it was the best thing i could have done
2006-09-27 06:35:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋