I have been with my fella for 5 years, i do love him but i have had a dream to move to the states but he really dont want to move there and is 110% sure, I have familly there and a job to go to if i wanted to move there shall i wait and go if we split up or just go. Apart of me wants to and can really see my self there, but another part dont cos of my partner. my sister is out there and am i just wanting to go cos i envey my sisters life or what its confusing me and am thinking about this all the time.
2006-09-27 05:15:50 · 32 answers · asked by mandy b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Follow your dreams so that in the end you will have no regrets.
2006-09-27 05:18:38 · answer #1 · answered by Dorrie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really seem to need to go, for your own personal satisfaction. If you don't go, you might end up regretting it and also resenting your fella later.
Why don't you talk to him gently about it, not all in one go, but keep on mentioning something about it ... soften him up so it isn't a stressful issue or a shock to him.
Then, try going there for 3 months. Tell him he can go with you (3 months might seems bearable to him). If he isn't responding to that, tell him this is something you must do and he can visit anytime.
Then go. The three month period should enable you to sort things out better; such as what do you really want, and could you actually continue to live there even if it meant splitting up with your guy, or should you go back because you either hate it there or miss him too much etc.
No good thinking too much ahead, and too much thinking is bad for you.
If he thinks the parting will be only for 3 months, he will let you go (even if grudgingly) and look forward to your return.
And once you are there, you can think a bit more, and will have more to base your thoughts and feelings on, so I really believe this is the best way to solve your problem!
2006-09-27 05:26:46 · answer #2 · answered by kiteeze 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you know your answer already, you just to hear it from someone else. I would go like a shot, what has the Uk got to offer you, go out there and follow your dream, you only have one life, don't end up in a couple of years time, with regrets and hey if it doesn't work out, you can always come back. You have lived I presume in the Uk for 5 years with your man, well how about he lives in America for 5 years with you. Talk to him, tell him how you feel, tell him that you still love him, but this is something that you have to do, for you. Go for it girl grab that American Dream, either with him or without him, do what makes YOU happy. Good Luck and be happy.
2006-09-27 06:21:37 · answer #3 · answered by radiant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats more important to you? your boyfriend of 5 years? or your dream? unfortunatly no one else can decide for you. What happens if you and you bf never split up are you going to give up on your dream? what happens if you go out there and find that you should never have left him? Its a hard decission to make and I dont think anyone envys you. But if I was in that position I think I would have to follow my dream as I'd have regrets later on in life if I didn't. Good luck with your decission making!
2006-09-27 05:22:19 · answer #4 · answered by Jo. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family is a very important part of life. I think that since moving is on your mind, instead of just upping and leaving, why don't you go to the states for a vacation and then see how you feel. Good you to you
2006-09-27 05:22:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know what age you are,but i reckon youre young enough,early 20's?? You should go because if you dont youll end up resenting him in years to come and will always wonder what would have been .....get it out of your system,you may find its not for you and go home again,if hes for you, then he wont stand in your way,if hes stopping you,then do you really want to be with him? he'll control other areas of your life too. Life is for living and not for pleasing others. its guilt that has you confused. dont feel guilty.live your life how YOU want.if its true love, it will stand the test of separation. good luck and enjoy your life and live it for you and nobody else
2006-09-27 06:17:32 · answer #6 · answered by dossin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will probably regret it in years to come and end up blaming him for holding you back. There is that saying, If you love it let it go if it comes back it's yours if it doesn't it was never meant to be. I suppose you could apply this saying to your situation kind of if he really loves you he will go with you and give it a chance he never knows he might even like it. Suggest you just go for 3 months to try it.
Good Luck
2006-09-27 05:22:53 · answer #7 · answered by Claire U.K 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart ... go to the States and make a new life if that's what you really want.
You'll find another guy over there and your present fella will find himself another woman here when he gets over the break-up.
Be brave and go for it!
2006-09-27 07:39:36 · answer #8 · answered by Marinersfan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If moving to the States is your dream, then go!! If you're partner really loves you then he should be willing to go, or support you 100%. Don't give up your dreams for anyone or anything. Please update us when u decide. Good Luck .
2006-09-27 05:22:56 · answer #9 · answered by blairismypoodle2206 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You only live once...if your relationship is very good, don't go, but if he's not the love of your live, hit the road Jackie - and don't you look back no more!
Easy for me to say, right?
Follow your heart - be patient, it will tell you the truth.
Good luck.
2006-09-27 05:41:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think either way, your going to wonder "what if" later. Don't go just b/c you envy your sister tho. Thats no reason. Make a list Pro/Con to go or not to go. See what you think after you make the list then decide.
2006-09-27 05:20:16 · answer #11 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋