A couple gets married and moves out of town. When the stepchildren visit for the summer the wife has to watch and entertain the kids while the father goes out with his friends and stays out late. Finally the wife goes to an out of town celebration for an old friend and the father decides to go out of town with his buddies that same weekend and leaves his kids with one of his friends. Does this even sound right, is the wife being used? Why does he bother to have his children visit when he doesn't spend much time with them?
2006-09-27 05:09:03 · 19 answers · asked by Skypride 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That is abuse the wife shouldnt have to be there for his kids. He is getting away with too much.
2006-09-27 05:10:49 · answer #1 · answered by 2strongfor2long 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've kinda answered your own question there...why bother having his kids there if he just goes out. All I can say is 'those poor kids'. You should tell the other parent about what those two selfish people are doing. Even of the wife is being used...she should still know better than to leave the kids with some 'friend'. The father is a d*ck and needs to get his priorities sorted and respect his wife more.
2006-09-27 12:14:45 · answer #2 · answered by Munchy Mooneo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a jerk. The wife should confront him and let him know that she's willing to help him with the children, but she's not their mother and shouldn't have that responsility. It was perfectly in his right for him to find a sitter for his kids if he's going out. If the children are getting the most out of the time with their father, I don't see a problem, except for his wife being stuck with the kids all the time. He should also let his wife know where the kids are, just in case.
2006-09-27 12:19:43 · answer #3 · answered by mindrizzle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I wouldn't call him father material. While it isn't necessary that he spend every moment of the summer with them, it would be nice if he didn't dump them on the wife or a friend. If it's once a week, he goes out..that's fine...but if it's every night...that's wrong.
If she hasn't had children with him, she needs to serious ask herself why she thinks he'd behave any differently with the children they have together...than he is with the ones he currently has.
Simple answer...no, it doesn't sound right. He has them over the summer either to skip paying support for those months, or to keep from feeling guilty about the rest of the year.
2006-09-27 12:15:05 · answer #4 · answered by Kaia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are there for the summer, he need not be with them all the time, just as he wouldn't do so, if they lived with him year round. He also probably goes out with his friends, when his wife is away, because he cannot be with her anyway, and she's less likely to complain about him not spending time with her at those times.
However, what concerns me is why he is going out with his friends, and not with her... or at least including her on those outings? Why does she remain at home; is it her choice, or is it she's expected to and/or told to?
A marriage is more than just sex and playing house; it's also being the best of friends. Your mate is suppose to be your mate, because you enjoy their company. Maybe she doesn't want to be around him when he's with his buddies, or maybe he doesn't want her around. Who then is the one that doesn't enjoy the company of the other as much? That could be where the real problems is.
2006-09-27 12:22:11 · answer #5 · answered by eric l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are His kids, then the wife is getting used.
Why would a Married man need to go out and come home late without his wife? I mean, once a year with old friends or some special occasion is one thing. But NOT when his kids are home for a visit.
I would dump this immature loser, and FAST! Life is to short!
2006-09-27 12:15:38 · answer #6 · answered by C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you marry a guy that has kids, those kids become your kids too. However he isnt a great parent if he is constantly gone when his children come to visit. I would spend time with the children because thats most important, but I wouldnt let him get away with his behavior. She has to speak up and tell him how she is feeling, no one deserves to be a doormat for anybody.
2006-09-27 12:22:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't care about his children but he wants them to think that he does.
His childrens mother can't say "you never spend time with them" because he apparently does when inviting them places.
But rather then spending time with them he has you and his friends take care of them. This is ridiculous. He isn't a suitable father and as a matter of fact if I was his kid I would've told him that I don't want to come see him anymore.
His children are going to grow up to hate him when they realize his activities are more important then them. Next time he's going to invite them over tell him that you're going out (and have his friend play along too) and that he needs to spend time with his kids. If he doesn't, you shouldn't be with him because he doesn't care about you as much but a baby sitter!
2006-09-27 12:15:48 · answer #8 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and No he is kind of using his wife like he was probably using the mother. And no maybe the new wife just keeps the kid/s because she has other kids. My punk *** boyfriend used to do this with me & his daughter until I called him out about it. But now he wants to spend time with her but she is soo used to being with me that she chooses to be with me instead of him. And he has a problem with that.
2006-09-27 12:15:09 · answer #9 · answered by Just Me!!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The father is wrong. The step-mother should refuse to take care of the kids unless the father is more involved with his children.
2006-09-27 12:15:51 · answer #10 · answered by BUPPY'S MEME 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋