what shld a woman( widowed,with two children) do when her parents are too interfering in family and business matters?They think they are being a help,but the discussion almost always ends up in a bitter argument so much so that it becomes a scene for neighbours and other family members?
2006-08-16 07:14:02 · 4 answers · asked by aquarian 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This is about boundaries. There are several things you need to do.
Step one. Think through what boundaries you need to put in place so that your parents won't have knowledge of things you don't want them to know about. Before you can enforce boundaries, you need to really know what and where they are appropriate for YOU.
Step two. Let them know, lovingly and gently, that the information they're asking about is personal. A great response to too-personal questions is, "Why do you ask?" That will let them know you think they've crossed your boundary. Also, have a conversation with your children about family finances... that your internal family finances are PERSONAL and should not be shared with ANYONE.
Step three. Continue to maintain that boundary. It may hurt their feelings intially, but in the long run, it will create a much more healthy relationship between you and your parents, and your children and your parents.
One thing you didn't mention is whether or not your parents help you financially. If they do, I would suggest they may be entitled to know a bit more about your financial situation than if they don't.
2006-08-16 07:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by Amy S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you're having problems with your parents, but know that this is only coming from their being concerned about you. Sometimes though it can become overbearing and that's when you need to have a CALM talk with them. You have enough on your plate being a widowed mom of 2, to have to deal with the negativity your parents inflict on you. If they can't approach you in a civil, respectful way, you need to tell them to beat it until they can treat you right.
2006-08-16 14:21:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not try writing them a letter explaining how you feel about the interfering? That way you can't argue back and forth, you would have gotten your complete point across.
2006-08-16 14:25:35 · answer #3 · answered by karen W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it hard to do but stop talking to them, and do better for your self
2006-08-16 14:19:44 · answer #4 · answered by IndyMM 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋