A few years ago when I was married, I had a really rough time of the relationship. [Hard to explain it... But I felt really torn apart]
It seemed I lost faith in the possibility of having a real nice relationship with a girl despite that it was the one thing I had always looked forward to, because I respected that we were married, and I felt I was copping this very hard!!
Anyway, what I wanted to ask was: The whole state of our relationship was affecting me so badly that I decided to go to a brothel!
I went in. There were girls sitting there; the lady asked if I wanted a girl - I nodded.
She said I needed to go out the back to prepare.
I went out to the back toilet, and decided I just could not do it!
So I shot out the back broken fence.
Can you give me some clues as to why I could not bring myself to intimately engage a girl when I so terribly badly needed the niceness of it in my life and needed just the sheer experience and reassurance of engaging a woman??
2006-08-11 20:38:18 · 7 answers · asked by dr c 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Well, first of all, I'm going to assume that you are no longer married, since you use the word "was" in referring to your marriage. With that in mind, it would be interesting to note what was the deciding variable to make the divorce come to fruition.
The next question would have to revolve around your sex life, and your age. Based on your great story, sex is an almost essential component of a relationship you would have with a female. I say "almost", because it can't be the ONLY one - and that explains your inablity to copulate with a prostitute. Sex is a referencing - a validating of a commitment made - and how strong is a commitment with a lady-of-the-night? The whole idea there is that there IS no commitment.
And so, you must determine why sex is such an important element to you, that made you go to the brothel, and is still causing you pain even now. I don't think it was the "niceness" or the "reassurance" of the engagement that is the core of the matter, and it would only be the "sheer experience" if you were a virgin, which is obviously not the case. Some men subconsciously require the touch, smell, sound, etc. of a woman because it brings with it the security that they experienced with their mothers when they were newborns. There are developmental phases each person goes through in life, and if some are not fully resolved, or replaced with a more mature version, then that person simply goes around and around in that state indefinately. Take a look at your past relationships, how you feel about women, and why looked forward to being married so adamantly in the beginning. I think your answer will reveal itself then.
2006-08-11 20:48:59 · answer #1 · answered by Scott Rinke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you were longing for a physical embrace but you weren't emotionally ready for any such thing. Heck, some people never are. Be true to yourself. Maybe in time it may be just the thing but not all people are able to shut off their emotions to get their rocks off, many people need both feeling and "passion" to function.
2006-08-12 03:46:33 · answer #2 · answered by dreamcatweaver 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I read your message. I dont know you at all. But I think that you didnt want to touch another woman because you actually know that sex and love are not the same issue. I perhaps dont understand what you are asking, but Id be glad to chat with you if you wamt me too. Im available now and I am at home
Ana
2006-08-13 19:05:53 · answer #3 · answered by Ilusion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably knew that was not what you needed to fix the problem
2006-08-12 03:44:55 · answer #4 · answered by Jodygirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
cause you know you might catch a disease..and above all GOD is watching and also..you wanted to give love one more chance
2006-08-12 03:45:25 · answer #5 · answered by kaka90250 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
your conscience kicked in
2006-08-12 03:40:58 · answer #6 · answered by Skeeterbug M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fear of incurable diseases?
2006-08-12 03:42:58 · answer #7 · answered by snafu22bohica 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋