Would you want to read a book with the below dust jacket description? Why or why not?

Question

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to be reminded of the glorious fundamentals that make them human, an individual feels compelled to convince them again of what they already know. This is my story, my exposition, and my presentation for you.

Constuctive criticism would be great! Thanks to all who answer.

Answer 1

No, to be honest, I wouldn't want to read this book. You can do better than this. If you really want to make me open your book then you have to tantalize me with at least a few details. You have too many generalizations. What are these "human events" and "glorious fundamentals?" You're also using very grandiose and stiff language that would turn off most people. Make it a bit more accessible and intimate. Good luck.

Answer 2

I would not even open the book. To get a readers attention and their money you need to get them in the first paragraph of the manuscript and even better if you can do it in the first sentence not the dust jacket. An example would be "Doctor Chalmers stared Mark Ryans wife Carol in the eyes and said I'm sorry, I did everything possible but your husband is going to live." That would make me want to buy the book and find out the whole story. Good luck!

Answer 3

Try not to use so much 'stuffy' language. Your cover wouldn't appeal to me as I would think it is another 'pat me on the back, I'm so great' saga written by a college professor with too much time on his hands. If you tell us what it is that makes you human, what the book is REALLY about, I think you are on the right track. It's about you, so tell us what you learned along the way (you can do it in common language - lots of us hold degrees and don't mind a common approach!)

Answer 4

Icebitch: It grabs my interest, yet in a detrimental way. "Oh this should be really undesirable. i imagine i am going to envision the precis and get a reliable giggle." Ghostvision: that's no longer undesirable, yet no longer precisely eye-catching both. The Evil One: examine Icebitch, yet magnified 100 situations. in case you imagine it truly is a reliable identify, you want to finish slightly artwork. Your tale on the different hand grabs my pastime. i imagine that "Freezing Phantom" can be a good call. may no longer fairly be suitable searching on what the ghost is like, besides the undeniable fact that that's there.

Answer 5

I agree with nightfire. Too much hardsell. Too pretentious and lays it on too thick. Borrows from the declaration of independence. However, it does make one curious once you look past the negative aspects. Tone it down a tad and it would work. Whatever it is, good luck with it.

Answer 6

Makes me feel like a hard sell at a used car lot. It's a bit heavy handed and preachy as if to say "I know what's best for you so listen to me".

Answer 7

Based on what you wrote as the description, yes, I would pick your book up to read it. But it had better grab me from the first sentence if you want me to read all of it.

Answer 8

I'd at least open it, but it seems a bit heavy for most people. If I wasn't in an academic-exploratory mood, I'd skip.

Answer 9

yeahh kinda sounds like ur saying listen to me i know whats right and you dont. and take out the last sentence and put in something exciting..something that makes you wonder.

Answer 10

Please don't take offense because none is meant-it sounds like the introduction to a school book-something that I would never read!