I can not seem to get my wife to get a job. I work and give all my pay for bills and the house payment.?

Answer 1

I've had this same problem for about 20 years, so nothing has worked for me, but it might work for you. There is very little hope in my situation. There was some good advice from others. Here are some of my ideas ... try them, what have you got to lose?

Divorce. Yes! Definitely do this. Especially if you are still young and have no children. Don't show any mercy to your moronic wife.

Leave her, but don't divorce her. Just pretend that she is mentally retarded and go on with your life as best you can, independently of her.

Reasoning. Try to speak calmly and reasonably. Be patient and give it some time. Try gentle persuasion. That did not work on my wife, but perhaps it would on yours.

Fight hard. Scream, throw things, be cruel. Again, that did not work on my wife, but it might on yours. I could not put much energy into fighting.

Think out of the box. I'm not kidding here. Go in really bizarre directions such as ...

Get a 2nd and 3rd job for yourself and the extremeness of it might get her thinking. Or quit your current job and start smashing appliances, furniture, etc...

Have a contest with her to see who can last longer without working.

Invite some smelly street people to live with you.

Stop bathing and take up weird hobbies like collecting old toothpaste tubes. Maybe she find you so revolting she'll beg for a divorce.

End every sentence to your wife by screaming the words YOU ****!

If you solve a problem, your #2 problem becomes your #1 problem. A twist on this is to create another big problem that overshadows your current #1 problem (wife won't work). Become addicted to alcohol and or drugs. Become a chronic woman chaser. Pick up whores regularily, especially in areas where cops make stings. Imagine all the trouble you can bring into your family where the fact that she doesn't work now becomes your #2 or #3 problem. Gamble heavily. Buy expensive cars. Spend money on expensive dinners for yourself. Buy a new pair of shoes every other day and shine them constantly in her presense.

Be cold to your wife. I have found a strange balance where I no longer really love my wife ... I sometimes hate her, but I manage to stay cordial. It is a sad situation. If she would even work part time, it would make a huge financial contribution to our lives that would improve so many different things. That's why I resent and hate her. Such a small effort on her part would be wonderful. I'm stuck and don't know how to change things. Don't let it happen to you! We have to strongly discourage this kind of voluntary behavior in our spouses.

Learn how to cope with the stress. It is sort of like a tree that grows up in a constant and strong wind. The tree looks all bent and deformed after 50-100 years. Yet that tree still has roots and can perform photosynthesis. In my case, I have become super practical, very good with budgeting money and walk around something like a robot where I have little empathy for other people's feelings. I have no hope of changing things so I face things squarely.

Get a lawyer to sign something with her declaring you to be her slave. Isn't that what it really is? Perhaps making the problem worse will help.

Try defining the problem in different ways. Your wife doesn't work is only one way of stating the problem. Say it like ... we can't make the house payment. My wife is lazy. I work too hard at a crummy job. Sometimes stating the problem in different ways allows you to see different solutions.

Good luck!

Answer 2

You give all your pay to her for the bills and house payment? Why should she go get a job? Heck , she's having fun with your money. When she doesn't see the money anymore,,she may get a bit motivated. And go out and make her own!

Answer 3

Can't she realize that today, most households need two incomes? I was luck to be able to stay home with small children, but once it didn't cost my whole paycheck to pay for childcare, I went to school, got a degree and got a job.
Explain to her that she's got to find something to help you out, you poor thing... There's so much more to life than paying bills, and making a house payment.. And some of it happens to cost money...

Answer 4

Maybe your wife would rather have a home business. Does she like to talk to people? Would she rather use the phone or the Internet? It would take time to develop, not like an hourly paid job, but it's an option, if she's got the commitment and energy to really contribute to the household. Visit www.fortknox.IsaFreedom.com to get an idea of what home businesses are about - it's a whole 'nother world out there ...

Answer 5

Sounds like you have more serious problems than just your wife not working. Have you two talked about it? Have you shared how you feel? The easiest way to solve a relationship problem is to calmly talk about it. If that doesn't work and its still bothering you you may want to consider couples therapy. Obviously there is a communication issue if you are writing about it on yahoo and not talking to her about it. Another thing to consider...Do you have children? that is a job in itself.

Answer 6

usually i would say it is your job as husband to provide for your wife and be a bread winner.... but in these days of women wanting to be equal she should pay at least some of the bills.. tell her to get a job or hit the road... oh yeah i forgot....take all your money out of any joint accounts and put all in your name only...that way you can control the spending...she will want to work if she has to always ask you for money

Answer 7

Do you have children? Because for the longest I couldn't get one because of daycare situations...if not...then maybe she is just lazy and i would recommend you take care of the bills and stuff and just give her a little of the money for her pocket and she will realize if she wants money then she will work for it!

Answer 8

First off stop giving her your money. She'll eventually want a new pair of shoes and will look for a job

P.S. where do I find suckers like you? I would so love to quit my job and have someone support me

Answer 9

Sounds like my sister Angie. She sits and plays World of Warcraft from 12 noon until 5 am and she WON'T GET A JOB!! She makes me sick. I don't know what you should do? Write to Dr. Phil? Jk :)

Answer 10

It would be nice to be able to hang out with my kids and raise them to be great people. Unfortunately, I have to work 2 jobs (67.5 hours/week) to make ends meet with my husband and myself. I'm always worn out and my kids are paying for it. :(

I think its important for you to realize that if you have children, your wife already has a job: being a mommy.