How wrong am I to take my ex to court for contempt???

Question

I married a girl who was 21 and I was 32. I adopted her child who was five. She wanted a child when I was 38 and we had a beautiful daughter. When she was 36 she had unprotected sex with man that she didn't know. She was sexually abused as a child and has always had issues in the bedroom. I loved everything about her. But that wasn't enough. She was sexually abused as a child and is still a child in some areas of her life. And still I love her. Some how in all the mess she has alienated our 0 year old daughter from me and she is ok with it. She does not see the problem that my daughter did not call me on fathers day. I think in some sublyminal way my daughter is being manipulated to believe me to be the bad guy. My daughter is not getting the guidance that I think she needs. Oh she is getting love. But I have not had quality visitation in about 3 months because Janea didn't want to see me. I thought time was what she needed but things seem to be getting worse. HELP

I have called her many times and asaked her to visit me but the answer is always no and she never has a reason wxcept " I don't want to" She sais she loves me and my ex sais she tries to get Janea to see me but I wonder what is going on in her home enviroment. What is it she sees or feels ???

Answer 1

Like I said in your previous question posting...if you take your wife to court it is only going to reflect badly on you in your daughter's eyes. And without proof that she is manipulating your daughter...which it does not sound like you have hard proof of this...you are not going to get far in court. You are entitled to your visitations and if your wife is not allowing those then you could take her to court, but you didn't say that you were not getting visitation, just not quality visitation??? I would think that time spent with your daughter, regardless of good or bad, would still be quality time. I think you are focusing too much on your needs and wants and less on your daughter's needs and wants. Your daughter has some anger towards you and her not calling you on Father's Day was letting you know that. Calling your ex-wife and expressing your anger about this is not going to make your daughter want to call you more. Just keep doing nice things for your daughter. Show her no matter what you love her and are going to keep trying until she comes around. Send her a card. Offer to take her shopping to her favorite store or take her to her favorite fun place. Focus on HER...not your ex-wife and not yourself.

Answer 2

If you don't have a set visitation schedule, then you need to go to court and get one. If the mother has anger, and if she is immature and not thinking of her daughter, she will manipulate your daughter and daughter's always want to please there mothers, so the daughter is saying that to please her mother.

Your message doesn't say how old your daughter is, but it sounds like she is being manipulated and you need to enforce the visitation and see your daughter on a regular basis. If it is set for a certain time, do not cancel or let your ex cancel, and it isn't the childs choice, you are the parent and you know what is best for your child and that is to see both parents.

There are to many mother's that play these games, believe me, I have lived through it by being the step-mom and from my own experience I will say one thing, don't let her alienate you from your child. And be the better person, by keeping a cool head.

If your Mom is in the picture, you should have her explain to your daughter how important it is that she call you and wish you a happy Father's day and that it is nice to give Daddy a present, like having her make you a card, etc.

Answer 3

you have as many rights as she does so hire an attorney and get your visitation rights. nothing is wrong with this. she should not be doing this to you! no one should deprive a good father or mother from seeing their children. don't feel guilty. if you still love her who knows what the future may hold. take one day at a time. the children need a mom and a father. so do this so you can have peace of mind. then if she don't let them see you she can be held in contempt.and that will be her fault. stand up for your rights no one else will. as you can see she does not care! maybe she is seeing someone else and is afraid you will find out threw the children? if that's her thing your better off without her at least for now. i wish you a happy future and all that applies

Answer 4

I think u should go to court for an agreement with her, in order to see your daughter because i think that isn't fair how she took u away your daughter away from you. And a women like that doesn't deserve to be with u,even if u love her.And if I were u ill break up with the moment she slept with an other man.

Answer 5

She is probably not wanting to see you, because she feels that you left her, so you must not love her. I'm not sure what would help at this point, as I don't know what it will make her feel like if you force her to see you. You might want to discuss this with a child psychologist.