i need something funny to ridicule failure. you wanna help me?

Question

i want to cheer up my friend. he sort of failed in something. i just need a joke or anything that can make failure seem as something not be ashamed of.

Answer 1

Failure is a part of life, and everyone has to deal with it in some way. If you are to be successful, you can't let failure get you down. You have to view failure as a learning experience, learn from your mistakes, learn your weaknesses and work to strengthen them.

I included some information on failures of famous people and some quotes.



Abraham Lincoln had 12 major failures before he was elected president of the United States.

· Isaac Newton did poorly in grade school.

· Beethoven's music teacher once said of him "as a composer he is hopeless."

· When Thomas Edison was a boy his teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything. He tried more than 2,000 experiments before he created the first successful light bulb.

· F.W. Woolworth got a job in a dry good store when he was 21, but his employer would not let him wait on customers because he "didn't have enough sense."

· Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. · A newspaper editor fired Walt Disney because he had no good ideas.

· Winston Churchill failed the 6th grade.

· Steven Spielberg dropped out of high school in his sophomore year. He was persuaded to come back and placed in a learning disabled class. He lasted a month and dropped out of school forever.

· Einstein's parents thought he was mentally retarded. His grades in school were so poor that a teacher asked him to quit, saying, 'Einstein, you will never amount to anything.'"

· Walt Disney’s first cartoon production company went bankrupt.

· Viewing Fred Astaire’s 1928 screen test, a producer noted: “Can't act. Can't sing. Balding. Can dance a little.”

· In 1947, one year into her contract, Marilyn Monroe was dropped by 20th Century-Fox because Darryl Zanuck thought she was unattractive.

· Barbra Streisand made her stage debut at nineteen in a show that closed after one performance.

· John Grisham’s first novel was rejected by sixteen agents and a dozen publishing houses.



Quotes About Failure:

"Most great people have attained their greatest success just one step beyond their greatest failure."

"Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up."

"Life's real failure is when you do not realize how close you were to success when you gave up."

"Often the difference between a successful person and a failure is not one has better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on one's ideas, to take a calculated risk - and to act."

"I do not believe in failure. It is not failure if you enjoyed the process."

"Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success."

"Through perseverance many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure."

Answer 2

Gee whiz Anak...Dont ridicule failure!! Tell your friend how important it is to be able to fail. You cant even imagine how many people out there that wont even try something....using the excuse that, why bother? I'll just fail...or I might fail....or I heard about another person that failed.

I'm sure...that if your friend sits down and thinks about what he or she did that caused the failure, they will probably be able to come up with a pretty important reason. The hard part here is the honesty part. Take away all the petty reasons like blaming other people, what you will have left is..what did I do that caused me to fail.

If your friend really gave it the best effort that was possible, then there will be a lesson to be learned. Usually, that lesson is...you should have worked a little bit harder.

Just a side note....I failed in three different business ventures, all with partners where it was real tempting to take a couple of days off and let them do the work....Then I started a fourth business by myself and dedicated all of my time and effort to making the company successful....it worked.

Answer 3

Tell him life is meaningless, and pretty much everything we do is as meaningless, so there is no shame in failure, for in the end, no one will care or remember. Cheers me up all of the time!

Answer 4

that isn't any longer top to assert that about any race/ethnic team. There are some incredibly ignorant people in this international.. do not enable them get to you I heavily wish my destiny little ones do not teach as stupid and illiberal as maximum little ones presently

Answer 5

type in failure in google and press "I'm Feeling Lucky" button. I think it is foolish, however.

Answer 6

"You get knocked down, get up again". No shame in falling, its a shame staying down there. So tell him/her ot get back up and try again.

Answer 7

Look on the bright, you can only get better!

Answer 8

whatever it is it can't eat him. Unless it's a grizzly or a croc?

Answer 9

THIS ONE IS FABULOUS!!!

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It was written by an 8-year-old?? Named Danny Dutton, who lives in Chula Vista, CA. He wrote it for his third grade homework assignment, to "explain God." I wonder if any of us could have done as well.



EXPLANATION OF GOD:


"One of God's main jobs is making people. He makes them to replace the ones that die, so there will be enough people to take care of things on earth. He doesn't make grownups, just babies. I think because they are smaller and easier to make. That way he doesn't have to take up his valuable time teaching them to talk and walk. He can just leave that to mothers and fathers."


"God's second most important job is listening to prayers. An awful lot of this goes on, since some people, like preachers and things, pray at times beside bedtime. God doesn't have time to listen to the radio or TV because of this. Because he hears everything, there must be a terrible lot of noise in his ears, unless he has thought of a way to turn it off."


"God sees everything and hears everything and is everywhere which keeps Him pretty busy. So you shouldn't go wasting his time by going over your mom and dad's head asking for something they said you couldn't have."


"Atheists are people who don't believe in God. I don't think there are any in Chula Vista. At least there aren't any who come to our church."

"Jesus is God's Son. He used to do all the hard work, like walking on water and performing miracles and trying to teach the people who didn't want to learn about God. They finally got tired of him preaching to them and they crucified him But he was good and kind, like his father, and he told his father that they didn't know what they were doing and to forgive them and God said O.K."


"His dad (God) appreciated everything that he had done and all his hard work on earth so he told him he didn't have to go out on the road anymore. He could stay in heaven. So he did. And now he helps his dad out by listening to prayers and seeing things which are important for God to take care of and which ones he can take care of himself without having to bother God. Like a secretary, only more important."


"You can pray anytime you want and they are sure to help you because they got it worked out so one of them is on duty all the time."

"You should always go to church on Sunday because it makes God happy, and if there's anybody you want to make happy, it's God!


Don't skip church to do something you think will be more fun like going to the beach. This is wrong. And besides the sun doesn't come out at the beach until noon anyway."


"If you don't believe in God, besides being an atheist, you will be very lonely, because your parents can't go everywhere with you, like to camp, but God can. It is good to know He's around you when you're scared, in the dark or when you can't swim and you get thrown into real deep water by big kids."


"But...you shouldn't just always think of what God can do for you. I figure God put me here and he can take me back anytime he pleases.


And...that's why I believe in God."


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(If you believe in God, please pass this on, and may God bless you too.)

Answer 10

If at first you don't succeed - lower your standards.