All categories - 7 January 2007

joke1
Diner: Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!
Waiter: Don`t worry, Sir, - it`s not that hot!
joke2
Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.
Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.
"Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"
"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"
joke3--
Teacher: Why are you late, Joseph?
Joseph: Because of a sign down the road.
Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late?
Joseph: The sign said, "School Ahead, Go Slow!"

2007-01-07 01:47:27 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Jokes & Riddles

my left click menu comes but while right clicking it either takes time to open or doesnt open at all. at the same time i went to control panel clicked on mouse option there tried adjusting still same prob. it is optical mouse with light at back.

2007-01-07 01:47:23 · 4 answers · asked by karthik r 1 in Laptops & Notebooks

2007-01-07 01:47:20 · 6 answers · asked by franksell2000 2 in Heart Diseases

to stop the threat of the world flooding due to climate change?

2007-01-07 01:46:59 · 2 answers · asked by happytaffy 4 in Earth Sciences & Geology

i wonder if i can take her doogie style.what do you think

2007-01-07 01:46:58 · 14 answers · asked by hopeing 1 in Singles & Dating

2007-01-07 01:46:53 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics

I am looking for a web site where he will be able to maybe meet players or get some memrobilia from the club

2007-01-07 01:46:50 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in English Football

I just was watching a video by jayz off his Kingdom come album .. and all I saw was him in this black car, and he was wearing a black hood, and he was riding around one city .. but what's the name of that song. It's sooo nice. And I want to watch that video again maybe on youtube.

Thanks

2007-01-07 01:46:46 · 4 answers · asked by hhgdgdfg 2 in Music

Does waiting to be married to someone before you are intimate make the marriage stronger?

2007-01-07 01:46:44 · 22 answers · asked by Abbra 1 in Marriage & Divorce

2007-01-07 01:46:35 · 3 answers · asked by stixmojo 1 in Heart Diseases

can u pls tell me whom or phat is d haltiast form of d crackin world?

2007-01-07 01:46:24 · 7 answers · asked by amazed !!! 4 in Cricket

what is the background, who invented it, and why?

2007-01-07 01:46:19 · 3 answers · asked by colin.henderson 1 in Programming & Design

I am a Jew. My father is a billionaire and he has an arms company and he is a shareholder in the British American Tobacco company. I am helping my father run the company.

One of the investers in our company asked me, "what do you say to the critics who compare the tobacco industry to alcohol?".

This is what I answered.
"I say uh uh. I'm rubber and they are glue and anything they say bounces off me and sticks to a ......dam."

I think it is a perfect answer with depth and intelligence and that they are jealous.

2007-01-07 01:46:12 · 7 answers · asked by Mr Business 3 in Singles & Dating

2007-01-07 01:46:11 · 8 answers · asked by JustLynn 6 in Polls & Surveys

What happened to the middle class that did all the work and fought the wars?

2007-01-07 01:46:05 · 6 answers · asked by Gypsy Gal 6 in History

2007-01-07 01:45:59 · 13 answers · asked by bagish 1 in Hair

2007-01-07 01:45:54 · 8 answers · asked by Hanlie C 1 in Languages

I broke up with my ex two years ago but continued to see him for a few months, I fell pregnant and only recently found out that he is her biological father, now he wants me back and wants to get married, and it is a logical solution but I don't love him, he's rude and arrogant, has no idea on what is appropriate for children ie puts on scary movies and expects our 4yr old to sit with him while he watches them. he has absolutely no idea on parenting and has in the past treated my daughter and I quite poorly, abusively even, he says he has changed but seems to be the same old mongrel he always was. I know I should let him spend time with the kids but I honestly believe he will only end up hurting them, I am trying to keep everyone happy in this sucky situation and I just don't know what to do? Do I look for someone better or just settle for what I can have. I am sick of being a single mum, and recently made the mistake of having sex with him again, worried I might be pregnant again.

2007-01-07 01:45:47 · 15 answers · asked by cheeky_lil_pixiegirl 3 in Other - Family & Relationships

2007-01-07 01:45:45 · 1 answers · asked by JLH 1 in Video & Online Games

I need some help - how do you know when your in love?

I have been going out with this guy for a couple of months and I really like him, I see him nearly every day and when I'm not with him I tend to think about him aswell. How do I know if I love him? and is it too early to say it - will I scare him off if I do?

2007-01-07 01:45:42 · 14 answers · asked by helpme?? 1 in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender

A farmer named Clyde had a car accident. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Clyde.
"Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the lawyer.
Clyde responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite mule, Bessie, into the..."
"I didn't ask for any details", the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"
Clyde said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road...."
The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a frau d. Please tell him to simply answer the question."
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Clyde 's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule, Bessie".
Clyde thanked the Judge and proceeded.
"Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move. However, I could hear ole Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.
Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun s till in hand, looked at me,and said, "How are you feeling?"

"Now what the **** would you say?

2007-01-07 01:45:38 · 14 answers · asked by dididdleydihi 3 in Jokes & Riddles

2007-01-07 01:45:36 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Credit

2007-01-07 01:45:30 · 16 answers · asked by nαrcíssα [misses being a TC] 6 in Polls & Surveys

My teenage daughter is a very smart young girl, and I believe that it is for that reason that she has begun to question her beliefs. She reccently told me that she is starting to lose her faith in God, and that she's started to be more interested in all of the scientific discoveries that have occured over the years that, as she puts it, make much more sense and scientific backing than the Bible.

I really do not know what to do in this situation. I do not want my daughter to become an atheist, especially at such an early stage in life.

What should I do?

2007-01-07 01:45:28 · 33 answers · asked by SGGGIRL 2 in Parenting

we paid 2 years ago it is rediculous?

2007-01-07 01:45:25 · 4 answers · asked by BabyDolll128 3 in Orlando

Replacing galvanized pipe(which basically is rusted shut), and wondered if where the people who had the house before hand replaced with copper, if we could tap into that with plastic to replace the steel?

2007-01-07 01:45:25 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Maintenance & Repairs

2007-01-07 01:45:22 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Singles & Dating

Hi my stepson is 14. I've always had my doubts as he has grown up, not into "boy" things. He has access to the internet via wireless, his pc is always messing up, and I have to fix it. I have found things on there that point to being gay, i.e. pictures, I also have a router that shuts down wireless links if any "porn" words are attempted and gives admin the reason why. I have found out that his activities have bee logged on the router, especially msn messenger, where he has been having webcams with a particular boy "friend" and watching each other do things that you can just imagine.
While I respect his privacy, and the privacy police will say i shouldn't have looked, I had to fix his pc, and I had to access the router logs, to find out what was shutting it down.
My questions are these,
Is he gay? or is it a growing up fad? (although I never went through this, and I am a man of 38)
I have no problem with it if he is, whats bugging me is should I tell his mother? if so how? Thanks

2007-01-07 01:45:18 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender

2007-01-07 01:45:13 · 3 answers · asked by TIMER 1 in Singles & Dating